Bangtan Writers Reviews

Pieces of the Past by @Auria_xox

Enigma by Auria_xox
Review by ARILEZX

IMPRESSION BEFORE READING

Title.

Definitely intriguing and catchy.

B U T

In a title, adjectives, verbs, pronouns, etc. (pretty much all words except for prepositions and articles, such as the and an) are capitalized.

Description

The first paragraph of your description sounds very awkward when you read it.

It may as well just be me but if you want, I can send you a revised version of it :)

Cover

Shouldn't like both Jimin and Yoongi be on the cover?

But I am not complaining though. I like your cover very much (:

Fits the vibe of your story.

AFTER READING

I am not really fond of blunt beginnings. Especially in stories like yours, when there is scope for so much better.

A little background about the main characters and their relationship would have been appreciated.

Your words were stiff and fast and the flow was inconsistent in the first chapter itself.

FOCUSES

Characters.

They were abrupt and lacked consistency in them, and I think most of it was due to the lack of information about their past (or background you could say).

Like for e.g:

In the first chapter, you'd mentioned about how everybody (minus Hoseok) drifted away from Yoongi after Jimin's death.

Now if all of them were very good friends, shouldn't they have comforted and helped Yoongi? Especially when he had lost the love of his life?

You could say that maybe it was because of them not being able to handle his death, but then what about Hoseok?

Plot.

My immediate reaction was confusion.

That is to say, when you write plots of this particular genre, meticulous planning is needed. You need to add minute details to help the readers understand the story.

But you have to be careful not to dump all the information at the readers all at once.

Keeping that in mind, the sudden appearance of the mysterious character can be justified by the addition of thrill to the story.

Please forgive me for saying this, but everything that you wrote after that chapter was completely random and seemed to have no connection with the preceding chapters. I failed to see a connection between them.

Writing Style.

Your style wasn't really suitable for this genre.

You have to be careful about where to describe what.

I don't want to know what colour pen was the character holding. What I do want to know is who that mysterious figure (from chapter one) was. What were his intentions? What is the connection between the story and the butterfly marks?

You have to answer the questions of the readers in such a subtle manner that when you answer one question, you leave them at a cliffhanger with even more unanswered questions.

ADVICE

Characters + Plot.

Both of them are somewhat indirectly dependant upon each other. You make your characters more realistic, your story picks up the pace.

You fill out the plot holes, your characters begin improving.

You can begin by giving your characters some specific traits to help them standout. Like certain hobbies, allergies or dislikes. Then slowly relate those traits to their pasts (subtly) to create a sense of excitement.

As far as the plot is concerned, you can still pick up your pace since the book is still in its early phase. However, I do recommend you rewrite the first chapter with an entirely different direction in mind.

Writing style.

The only way of improving your style is by reading more stories of the same genre (to get an idea of how to deliver such stories) and stories of different genres (to get an idea of basically everything).

In short, just read more.

Also, learning new words and phrases might prove to be an asset too.

ENDING NOTE

Did this review make any sense? No?

Thought so.

I am so sorry for being this late <3

You nice, keep going <333

We remind you to credit us, thebtswriters, and your reviewer,ARILEZX, in the description of your story for giving you a review. Thank you for requesting!