After the War.

It Was Going So Well.

Rage boiled through me as I walked through the hall to my room. The walls felt colder than before and if I had slowed enough I was sure paintings would have been speaking to me but I didn't pay any attention as I saw red and felt cold.

My painting was greeted and the password spoken as I pushed in and saw the same blasted cat as I had been for years. "I may be a pain in her ass but you are a hell of a lot worse. For the love of all that is holy don't follow me. I am about to change and I don't fancy stripping in front of McGonagall's cat," I seethed and felt myself spit in passing as the fire roared and the falling snow outside fell with a hint of aggression. Not that it mattered anymore as the events had happened and I was alive.

I slammed the door behind me and found a fresh but most importantly dry set of clothes for the rest of my day. Not that there was much other than dinner and that was a no show for most of the year anyway. It didn't matter at that time about dinner, my clothes that would have to dry didn't matter, nor the pressure of doing well in a school I was still certain I didn't belong in, none of it mattered. What did matter was getting dry and sitting down because I was tired. Babushka took up residence on my bed and sprawled out but as I threw my wet clothes she audibly made a stretching sound and then curled back up. A glance was sent my way but she was a cat and only knew how to judge.

Just as the clothes were being pulled on I stopped and grabbed comfortable pyjamas on and folded up my clothes again. I didn't have it in me to wear outside clothes. Lessons would force me into an uncomfortable situation where I had to look at the face of those girls and other people in the Gryffindor house. One thing was for sure, I no longer liked Emily and that hurt more than anything.

I felt my legs give way and hands cupped my face as I thought on what had happened. The shorts I wore had slipped up so it was like a pair of pants and my top was covering the essentials. Slowly my hands began to rub my face and tears fell making it easier to wipe my face. My morning had started so well.

I felt exhausted but the tears wouldn't stop and even when a pair of arms wrapped around me I didn't stop until finally, strong hands pulled my hands away and my horrible mug was visible to all. I felt so ugly as well as betrayed.

"Hey, Iona. Don't cry because if you do then so will I. Selfish I know but that is me summed up." He fell into silence but I didn't say anything. His arms soon wrapping around me and pulling me closer to his side. He was holding close until finally I was on his lap and he was rocking me.
"Please Iona. Don't cry." I seemed to slow down my breathing and the double breaths claimed me as well as the shaking that I had to deal with.

After a while, I relaxed and looked properly. My eyes met the cat and I glared, not hating it but not really understanding why it was always there when I was at my lowest.
"Freaking cat. Run along." I waved my hand and it did just that. Nothing was said for a second before finally, I thought I might sleep.

"Can you tell me what happened?" I sighed and let out a shaky breath and nodded before pushing him to lay down and I curled up. Trusting him with all of my emotions in a way I had never done before.

"Emily said that she wanted to revise with me and wanted some help. I met her and we did for a while before we began to walk around the lake and quiz each other on the questions. I told her about how a few Christmas' ago I got scared and fell into the lake. The next thing I know I'm in the lake and a load of Gryffindor girls are all laughing and pointing. It was the four that she is always with." I stopped and the soft sound of past tears stopped me from talking at points. "Am I really that stupid? Do I really believe in people too soon? Am I really so worthless that a girl I have started to open up to could do this? Am I an idiot?" He rubbed my arm and I signed out. Content with his actions as the sleep surrounded me. The night was carrying me away.

"Please don't leave me." Was given as my last breath before finally the night took its claim to me and my brain, one final glance told me that the cat was at my door again. It had been a tough day for me and so it was easy to sleep so early. Elliot hadn't slept for days so I knew he needed it too.

My eyes felt stuck together when I was forced to open them. A warm body held my body close to them and hands were resting around me but I broke free and gave a strong push to the body below me. "Elliot. Wake your ass up. Breakfast has just begun and you need to change." He nodded and got up with a sigh, leaving after a quick kiss was given to me on my cheek.

By the time I had washed and dressed my first and longest lesson of the day was due to start and I was not ready for it. Professor Binns could drive even the kindest Hufflepuff into the most crazed Gryffindor or angry Slytherin. I didn't let that stop me from my walking and when at the door I slid in with all of the wind in my sails. That was what I wanted the outside world to think at least because one thing I could do was force a smile and pretend that I wasn't even struggling. That and Emily didn't deserve to see me struggling or even remotely different from her actions the girls that were often with her didn't deserve to see me frown either.

When I walked in though I stopped for a split second before walking over to my usual chair and pretending that there was nothing wrong with that I saw. Or rather what I didn't see. Emily was absent and so was her crew. I couldn't understand why, if any of us couldn't or rather shouldn't be in the classroom it would be me and yet those five were all absent and Professor Binns' eyes suck to their vacant seats. Since the start of the year I was almost always the last one in and yet five of them were all absent at once. I thought perhaps they had skipped the lesson but it wasn't like those five to skip and it also wasn't likely that they would have missed out on seeing me suffer they probably would have preferred it if I hadn't turned up.

It had been an entire day and I had seen them in other lessons but they kept to themselves as they whispered and the Leah girl pointed, laughing at me, but I kept with those around me and the fact of me being in multiple houses helped as I was acquainted well enough with my whole year and also some family members of theirs. Dinner was the last thing to check off and so I was able to be alone in my room. I had snacked all day and so missing meals wouldn't have had any real implications, even if I had started eating in the hall more often since the start of the year. That was until the lake incident not long ago.

My room was tidy but once I was at my desk all of the work I needed to be done was placed down and parchment followed. My ink ran smoothly across the page as I used my quill, the serenity soothed me until finally, my hands glided on their own. The books were at my side with the most suitable pages available until the ink would run out and I would have to use the pot again. Transfigurations was a good class and nearly my favourite but arithmancy was the one I could learn about for days. My opinions had changed over my time at Hogwarts but it was settled at that moment that no other subject was quite as good. I had been mumbling to myself as soon as I started working. Comments on how I didn't understand what was being said and then comments of how I understood it followed. Numbers and small notes on symbols I would have to remember left and soon I found that not only had I finished the work but also read the next few pages, complete with notes.

My heart was a steady beat and I found my foot tapping on the floor as a way of creating some sound but I drowned it out quickly by diving into the next topic. I had covered all of the subjects I didn't want to do first and then arithmancy followed by transfiguration so that it was a steady close. I was so intrigued in finding an answer, stumped completely by it, that I never realised that I had stopped tapping on the floor and I had also stopped wiggling my body constantly.

"Miss Flint, I was sent to collect you." I jumped and turned quickly before seeing that it was Professor Vector. I smiled up at her for a second before getting to my feet and then moving to the side of the chair to pull on my robe before blindly following. She was an overly strict teacher who held a passion for her subject. She was at times harsh and my marks weren't as high as I felt I deserved but she knew her facts and was a kind woman. Her face was harsh but her hair was always down and in a style that tricked others into thinking that she was more laid back than she really was. She also just so happened to be the only professor that I never would have asked any questions to. I would follow her because of two reasons, I trusted her and was slightly scared of her, hence she had grown to be my boggart.

As soon as we go to our destination I no longer trusted her. She had led me to dinner and I had to stay. She was stood behind me and so I walked in and sat with Elliot. His face was politely smiling like always and all of his Ravenclaw friends greeted me with warm and kind smiles.