11 - Confusion At Its Finest

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There is no instinct like one of the heart. ~Lord Byron

Luke's POV

Michael pulled back and smiled at my expression before patting my cheek and walking away to his car.

I don't quite know hat happened except that I think Michael just kissed me.

He kissed me.

I'm not quite sure what's worse about this. The confusion or the fact I liked it. I never thought I was gay or bisexual or anything but straight but Michael kissed me and unless he's secretly a woman.. Well, then I don't know.

I must have stood there in shock for at least fifteen minutes, maybe even twenty before everyone or anyone came outside.

"Luke? What are you doing? You are taking an extended period of time. Where is Michael?" Ettie said as she walked over to me and waved a hand in front of my face.

My hands trailed up to my lips and ghosted over them as I spoke. "Michael kissed me.."

"What?!" Calum gasped.

"I think Michael kissed me." I mumbled.

"You think?!" Ashton chimed in.

"Well what happened?" Natalie asked.

"I-I'm not gay.." I mumbled. "But I..I-uh.."

"You..What?" Ashton pressed.

"I liked it.." I said and turned to everyone with shocked expressions. "It's so unbelievably incorrect but..Hell I don't know."

"Luke maybe you are gay.." Ashton said.

"I-I am defiantly not!" I panicked.

"You kissed a guy and liked it." Calum sighed.

"Katy Perry kissed a girl and liked it but she's straight!" I argued and ran off. Since my car wasn't here I had to walk home but I wasn't about to stand by while people tell me my sexuality.

I am not gay I know that much. My mother would be so upset if I was. Her son, her perfect son, not giving her children.. She would hate me for it. I know it.

Stupid Michael with his stupid soft and warm and nice and - dammit! I shouldn't be going on like this. I hate Michael sometimes. A lot of the time. He makes situations so complicated. So damn hard for me. Why does he do that?!

I could sure use a good book right now.. Maybe some math problems to distract me.

Well what is three thousand divided by thirty seven?

Eighty-one point zero eight one.

Four-hundred-and-ninety-three multiplied by the square root of ten?

One-thousand five-hundred eighty-eight point eight-six-six.

Curse my smart brain!

I can literally feel myself going insane right now as my brain works incredibly fast.

Why is this happening to me? Weeks ago I was completely content until one day I was interrupted in the library. I was sour that I was disturbed but it passed almost immediately. It was weird when I was approached at ounch, but I didn't think anything of it. And now I wish I did. Maybe I could miss the complex feelings surging through me.

It's weird, I want so badly for all of this to never have happened but in the long run, I'm so glad it did.

Do I honestly like Michael? What am I kidding. He makes me crazy happy. He makes me nervous and he is nice - most of the time.

"Michael Clifford.." I mumbled. "What have you done to me?"

I finally made it home and of course no one else was home. I was purely alone. Maybe I should have stayed with everyone else. I hated being home alone and as whimpy as it may sound I would lock all the doors and windows and simply whimper on the couch.

I pulled out my phone and called Ashton and he picked up almost immediatly.

"Hey Luke." Ashton said.

"I-I'm home. All-All alone." I stuttered.

"Luke..You're seventeen years old." Ashton sighed.

"I know." I groaned. "Please come over Ashton, I don't like being home alone.."

"Will you buy pizza?"

"Yes."

"I will be over." Ashton said and the line went dead as I laid on the couch. Pulling a book off the table.

I could usually get lost in a book without problem, I was usually really satisfied with reading because for me it took away the pain, it took away the mental anguish of the day. It just made me relax. But not today.

I still couldn't get my mind of Michael and I couldn't deny the fact that I wanted him here right now. Not Ashton.

Okay maybe I'm not so straight.

"Hell.." I groaned as I flopped over to look at the ceiling.

A few minutes later, after being curled in a ball, the doorbell rang and I stood up to answer it.

I suppose I should stop asking for certain events to happen to me because I opened the door and stood wide eyed. Realizing that was not Ashton, not even close. Instead it was Michael.

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AUTHOR'S NOTIFICATION:

So ya :3 That was short and predictable and unedited xD but I'm tired and people at my school are ridiculous. Seriously they need to grow up, and I'm saying that in the lightest terms possible.

I'm like starving also but it's almost time for dinner, so. Just have to wait.

Anyways that's all I really have to say!

Yay! I think?

*Giggles*

Hugs, Kisses, Cuddles and Serenades xX

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