Darker Than He Seems| |Sanders Sides

Depression (Pt. IV)

Depression's Storm

Tw; Anxiety/Panic attacks, the usual, depression, depressive spell/episode, crying, blaming oneself, Apathy just dies for Envy, blood, suicide attempt mention, gore, Remy hasn't slept in several weeks, and I think that's it

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Virgil was just minding his own buisness, hanging out, sitting on top of a high shelf. You know, normal things he does. It was a normal day, until the door burst open, and Remy and Apathy let themselves in. "Hey bitches, we're alive!"

"Where's my tiny Sea Serpant? I've been making sure Remy hasn't gotten himself killed in his insomnia-induced haze, I need to cuddle and binge Addams Family Values clips with my-hey Emile-tiny Boyf."

"Um, about that," Emile got up from his place on the couch and walked slowly over to the emotionless side.

"What? Has something happened?" Apathy asked, worry crawling it's way up his throat, the taste of iron filled his mouth, but he ignored it.

 "Um.... Envy's currently experiencing one of his depressive spirals and Dee and I have been and trying to keep him away from sharp things?" Emile said, experimently.

"What?! And you didnt think to call me?!" Apathy shouted. His mouth was most definately full of blood now, it was dripping down his chin. Not to mention the blood he felt dripping down his arms and figertips.

"Well, Dee asked me not to tell you this, but he did attempt suicide a couple days ago," Remy said guiltly.

"And you didn't disobey him?! Is that why you were stalling coming back here?!" Apathy yelled, then took a moment to cough a bit; blood was filling his lungs and he felt like he could barely breath. Maybe that was partially due to the panicked state he was in.

Remy winced. "Y- yeah.... I figured we could wait out this one, so you wouldn't worry, but the other day Emi sent me a text saying we needed to come back or things might get worse."

"What does it look like I'm doing now?! Worrying!? Probably more then if we had come back when we were supposed to! Because I'd have been here for my boyfriend you fucking idiot!"

"Apathy, just take a breath, Deceit's upstairs trying to get Envy to fall asleep, can we talk about this maybe downstairs?" Emile said, smiling slightly.

"How can I-" more coughed up blood. "-I take a fucking breath if I can't breathe!?" When he said that realization struck across Apathy's face. He started hyperventilating. The phrase repeated itself in his head several times over until he was hyperventilating. The breaths he managed to take were raspy and hollow. Blood was filling his lungs and esouphagus. "Ican'tbreathe- I- I can't breathe, I can't- it was- my fault- I'm the problem- I- I-"

Virgil, still on his perch up on one of the shelves, had been witnessing the entire thing. The amount of pure panic and anxiety radiating off of Apathy like a dark ocean drowning anyone who swam too far out. He was conflicted. Virgil wanted to do something to help, but he knew Emile and Remy enough to know they were able to take care of it. And he... kinda wanted to see how things played out.

"Apathy, it's not your fault, I promise! Envy just.... doesn't work the same as a normal side." Apathy couldn't really hear him. Smoke was coming off of his hands, his blood was steaming it seemed.

"My fault- didn't mean too- I- breathe- can't-"

"Apathy," Emile said, gently grabbing Apathy's hand and placing it on his chest. "Follow my breathing okay?" Apathy calmed down after a little while, but passed out almost as soon as he did. Remy caught him as the emotionless side fell. His breathing was still raspy, as his lungs weren't nessecarily clear of the blood.

"Might as well let him rest until Envy wakes up. Or get's out of bed. Whichever will happen soonest."

"Good idea," Emile said, concerned. He wasn't nessecarily to worried about Apathy, it was the fact that Apathy had a panic attack. The last time he ever had a panic attack was when he first used his puppet strings on accident.....

The two walked upstairs so they could put Apathy in his bed.

But now, Virgil was even more confused. They had talked as if Envy going into a depressive state was a normal thing. Virgil never remembered seeing the jealous trait act like this before, though. He might need to ask.....

A few hours later, most of the sides were gathered in the living room. Virgil was sitting on the coffee table, Patton, Emile, and Logan were in the kitchen trying to decide what would be for dinner, Deceit and Remy were on the floor while the tv played some random cartoon, Roman was in the arm chair, and Envy and Apathy managed to get the couch all to themselves. They were just chilling, watching tv when Apathy noticed something.... odd.

"Envy,where's your ring?"

"What?" Envy asked, quiet and tired.

"Your ring. Where is it?"

"It's right he- oh shit." Envy held up his hand, where he usually wore his ring. It was missing; his Talisman was gone.

"When was the last time you saw it?" Remy asked. The other two had gotten the attention of the other sides in the room.

"Um........ I dunno....." Envy said, curling himself into a ball on the couch. Apathy placed a reassuring hand on Envy's shoulder.

"It's fine, we can find it. It can't be that hard to find an onyx and emerald ring," Roman said. Envy kept silent.

"Lake...  The Lake.... or maybe it was the garden a few weeks ago...." Envy said at last.

"Well, when we left the lake you had it, I know. You forgot it, but used your water manipulation to grab it before we left," Apathy said.

"So that'd leaves the garden.... Roman and Deceit can go check, if that's fine," Virgil said.

Envy nodded. He doubted he had the energy at the moment to get off the couch. Everything had just been fuzzy and hazey this past week. And it was strange, his shadow had grown... a bit quieter then usual..... And he was just now noticing his missing ring. No wonder he felt so out of it.

He just wanted to sleep.... Maybe... he could close his eyes... Just for a moment....... And he was asleep within a minute. The lights dimmed themselves and Apathy was now stuck. Envy wasn't a light sleeper, but he wasn't a heavy sleeper either.

"Okay, you guys can go look for his ring before he wakes up.... Also someone get him a blanket, I'm not nessecarily a heat generator and I don't want my Green Day to get cold." Deceit got the blanket for Envy and plaaced it gently over the sleeping sides peaceful shoulders.

"Alright Roman, let's go," Deceit walked away.

"Hey guys, we're gonna go check to see if Envy's ring is missing and stuff," Roman said to the people in the kitchen. "We might be back for dinner, we might not, anyway see you later!" Roman and Deceit left the Lightscape.

"What was that about?" Patton asked.

"Shh, Envy's sleeping," Virgil said, walking into the kitchen to grab a soda from the fridge. I'll be up in my room in case anyone needs me for something." As Vee walked back towards the stairs, he caught a glimpse of Envy's shadow, with glowing green eyes and a snarl. It looked as if it had horns as well. But when he blinked, the shadow was normal again.

Poor Virgil is so confused at this point. He wants to talk to Envy, but he doesn't want to hurt the sides feelings anymore when he seemed so vulnerable at the moment... So he'll hold off the questions for later.

I'm sorry. So sorry. But hey! Apathy is back! He needs a hug. So does Envy. Also Envy's life may be in danger. But only a little bit; he always his original Talisman! Wait what? Also, one more chapter until the end of this book!! Ooh, I'm so excited ifkjsvnlfjksnf!! Bye Guys, Gals, and Nonbinary Pals! ✌Peace Out!✌