Darker Than He Seems| |Sanders Sides

Depression (Pt. I)

Depression's Wings

Tw; Depression, Depressive episode/depressive spell, implications of cutting, mentions of overdose, mentions of suicide attempt, mentions of past suicide attempts, self-harm, cooking, I think that's it, please tell me if I missed something, this is a lot, Sorry not sorry

---Time Lapse---

Deceit

Envy was released from the hospital this morning. I wanted to ask him why he tried overdosing, but I was hesitant. He's tried to kill himself before, but he never tried to overdose. "Why did you...?" I trailed off.

Envy shrugged. "Seemed easier then life," he mumbled.

"Envy, that's not true! Death is just as hard as life."

"Hm.." Envy's shoulders slumped and he crossed his arms. He looked exhausted for someone who was just unconcsious for nine hours, give or take.

"Um..." God, Emile is so much better at conversation then me. "Do you wanna tell me why you feel it deaths easier then life?"

Envy shrugged again. "Dunno.It just seems easier right now...."

"Why?"

"Because... It just does... It's not like I'm needed..... Like you guys love to point out, I overshare everything. It would be better if I disappeared... For everyone...."

"Is that what you think? Envy, that is in no way true, you're pranks can be a bit dangerous but that doesn't mean we don't need you! And yes, you do have a tendency to overshare a lot, but we don't mind at all."

"You act like you mind," Envy said bitterly. 

"W- we never meant to make it seem that way," I said, as we arrived at the Lights house. I opened the door and let Envy in. He hesitated.

"You didn't tell them, did you?" Envy asked quietly.

"I was to busy panicking over the fact you were almost dead."

"Okay.." Envy walked in and I walked in after him. Patton was in the kitchen cooking, Logan was reading in the kitchen, and Virgil and Roman were playing Mario Kart.

"Hey kiddo's where were-" Envy walked up to his room and disappeared up there. "-you. What's up with him?"

I sighed. "Nothing... it's unimportant, what'll be for dinner?"

"Pasta."

"I wanted pizza!" Roman complained.

"We can have pizza some other time, but it's not healthy to just eat pizza!" I rolled my eyes and walked up stairs.

---Time Lapse---

None

Dee managed to keep Envy from trying to kill himself. Unfortunately, he wasn't so lucky when it came to when he tried to hurt himself. Mainly because Envy had one too many dangerous "pets" and kept sharp objects in his room. But Emile came over (Remy kept his word) and found the Lights as normal, and Deceit and Envy, with Envy... Not so normal. Emile quickly figured out what was going on.

Emile walked up to Deceit, who was standing in the background and asked simply, "Depressive episode?" Dee nodded. "How long have Remy and Apathy been gone?" Emile asked, looking at Envy, sitting on the couch, and staring at the television. It wasn't even on.

"Four days." Dee frowned. "I'm starting to worry about them. More specifically, Apathy."

"That's fair.... But for now, we should just focus on Envy." Dee nodded. He likely didn't see what Emile saw. Emile noticed it the moment he walked in. Envy's shadow was clinging to his shoulders, and whispering things in his ear.

Virgil and Roman were confused. Envy seemed a lot quieter recently, and it didn't look like he slept at all. Virgil can't talk, but still. It was strange. Envy was a rather talkative side when he wanted to be, and yeah, he still talked to them sometimes, but, at the same time, he was so much quieter. He didn't really pay attention when someone was speaking, either; he was just constantly zoned out, in his own little world. What was going through his head??

"Have you noticed something wrong with Envy?" Roman asked Virgil at some point.

"Yeah," Virgil nodded, "He's acting....weird."

"Yes, almost like he's-"

"Deirdre."

I think I'll end it there :P I hope I made you wonderful readers suffer! I'm joking. So Virgil's come to an odd conclusion, huh? Emile seemed focused on the shadow. Why? See you later, Guys, Gals, and Nonbinary Pals! ✌Peace Out!✌