Ignited ✔️

1:20

-RIVER-

Another bottle down and I still didn't feel any better. I felt guilty. I'm a fucking liar and I hate myself. My mind was in  a constant war and my body was numb. My eyes burned and were hooded due to the hidden stack of weed I had smoked only an hour earlier.

I was glad that Raina had taken Rosie out of the house because I wouldn't want her to be near me like this. Nobody should be. I'm self destructive. I don't even think when I'm drunk.

I tried to fucking kiss Emery. My job is to squeeze as much information out of her as possible not to kiss her. I didn't know what I was thinking.

The rain pattering against the roof of my apartment helped soothe my crazy mind. I couldn't handle myself right now. The bourbon in my hand had fully taken control of me and I couldn't help but think.

I fucking hate thinking.

All I see when I close my eyes is my moms face, the terrified expression it held right before she died. All I can see is the red blood seeping out of her stomach from where she was shot.

What really scares me is those days I close my eyes and see her instead. Her pale blue eyes searching for me screaming for me to come save her.

I can't save her.

My phone pings notifying me of a new text.

Raina: River you need to go down to the garage. The girl you're supposed to be watching just ran out sobbing. She was talking to Carter.

My heart started wildly thumping against my rib cage as I read the words on my screen. Why was Emery talking to Carter?

Did he tell her?

I stumble as I try to stand up and the bottle in my hand falls to the floor, the ember liquid pours out of the bottle but I pay no mind to it.

My vision was blurry and my head felt like stone. It was so heavy. I trip over a discarded bottle as I rush to put on my boots.

My phone pings with another text as I swing open my front door and run down the stairs.

Carter: I just have to say this... you're welcome. I've made your life so much easier now

What a fucking prick.

I run around to the front of the garage and yank open the heavy door. I didn't even bother to change or grab a jacket.

"Carter!" I shout

Everyone's eyes are on me as I scan to garage for him.

"Show yourself you fucking prick!"

Carter appears coming out of the office with wet spots on his shirt and an evil grin plastered on his face.

"What the fuck did you do?!" I scream as I clutch the collar of his shirt and slam him back against the wall.

His grin only widens and his devilish brown eyes twinkle.

"I told her the truth River. She deserved to know" he sneers

Red clouded my vision as my fist clenched. I swung and hit him in the jaw, if I wasn't higher than a kite I would've been able to hit him harder.

Carter spits in my face and breaks free of my weakened grip. He tackles me to the ground and my head hits the concrete flooring. Pain rushed to the area of impact and spots flooded my already blurry vision.

I throw my fist out again and make impact with something, I just didn't know what. My adrenaline was spiked and my high was starting to wear off.

Carter pins me to the ground and punches my stomach and ribs repeatedly. My air escaped me and I couldn't get it back.

I could hear a voice screaming but I couldn't make out whose it was or what they were saying. My focus was only on his face and how badly I wanted to bruise it.

Emery's face suddenly flashed in my vision and I saw that terrified expression again. The one that has been consuming my thoughts the last two weeks.

A spurt of energy forms in my body and I switch our positions and my hand wrap around Carters neck. His hands claw at my arms and body as my grip tightens.

His brown eyes began bulging and his face was turning bright red as he attempted to gasp for air.

"River!" My sister shouts from behind me.

"River stop it! You're going to kill him!"

The panic in her voice stopped me. I release his throat and quickly stand up before swiftly kicking his stomach.

Raina rushes to his side and grabs his face between her hands as Rosie slowly trails behind her. My niece looks up at me and I'm surprised that I don't see any fear in her eyes.

"Zio River?" (Uncle River) Rosie says as she slowly approaches me.

I couldn't speak, my jaw was locked and my brain wasn't functioning properly.

She slips her small hand into mind and stands up on her tip toes, motioning for me to get closer to her.

"bella signora corse verso la spiaggia" (pretty lady ran towards the beach) she whispered in my ear.

I pull away and study her as she shows me a huge toothless smile.

"So che mamma non lo fa, ma mi piace. lei è buona per te." (I know momma doesn't, but I like her. She's good for you.)

"Grazie fiore" (Thanks flower) I respond before leaning down and kissing the top of her head.

She removes her hand from mine and gives me a quick tight hug before running back over to her mom who was still fussing over the asshole crying on the floor.

Fucking pussy.

I didn't even hit him that hard.

I roll my eyes at him before turning on my heel. I knew exactly where I could find her. I slam open the heavy metal door and step out into the cold rain as I catch sight of the lighthouse in the distance.

I was tired of this. I needed to get it over with.

My feet led the way as I ran towards the lighthouse. The wet pavement under my feet just made me move faster. My socks and boots were soaked due to the rain and the puddles I ran through but I didn't care. I didn't care that my hoodie was soaked through or that my jeans were sticking to my skin, I only cared about her in this moment.

For the first time in a long time my heart was beating for a reason. I hadn't realized it before today just what that reason was.

I was terrified things were going to go wrong, and I knew that I was going to get hurt once my dad found out but I didn't care.

When the entrance to the staircase came into my line of sight, I sprinted up the stairs two at a time. My lungs were begging for air but I didn't let that stop me or slow me down.

Once I finally reached the top, I push the door open and step out onto the balcony and that when I saw her.