✔️STRONG [L.S]

[39]

{LOUIS' POV}

*April 24th, 2015*

I leaned against the counter as I read the prescription's for Harry's medicine's. Then, I sat the pill's he needed to take on the table. Dust covered my finger's as they brushed against the wood, making me crinkle my nose. It suddenly hit me just how long we had been gone from our home. With no one taking care of it, it was filthy. So, with that in mind, I grabbed the broom from the closet and began to sweep the tile floor of the kitchen. Today, I decided, would be for cleaning. That sounded strange coming from me I know, but the past year has really gotten to me. I've grown more mature now I suppose; not as loud as I was before.
A year. That's what really got me thinking. A whole year of my life was gone, and I was never going to get it back. If the past year hadn't happened how it did, what would be different? We would have finished the tour-yes. But what else? What would have happened with Harry and I? Would management have let us finally come out? I laughed sadly to myself. Probably not.
I froze at that thought; realizing something. The whole world knew. The whole world knew
Harry and I were -are we still?- an item; that we were gay. My chest tightened. They knew everything else too. They knew Harry has schizophrenia. They knew he beat me. They knew I tried to kill myself. They knew we were both sent away. The only thing I knew for a fact they didn't know, was that Harry raped me. I shivered, shaking my head as I continued to sweep.

***

By the time Harry woke up and stumbled sleepily through the doorway. I had the whole kitchen cleaned, and even had time to go and grab groceries for breakfast. And by breakfast I mean a box of poptarts and two gatorades. No matter what else had changed over the year, I still couldn't cook. It wouldn't matter if I could anyway, seeing as the electric and water weren't working. Only because we weren't here to pay bill's. I made a mental note to call the company today.

Harry slid into a chair at the table and cracked open his gatorade, taking his pill's.

"Kitchen looks nice." He said quietly, looking around.

"Mhm." You could literally cut the tension in the room with a knife. After the incident the night before, I slept in the bedroom, and Harry slept on the couch. We hadn't agreed on it verbally- no word's were spoken at all- but I think we both realized we couldn't jump into thing's so fast. I gulped quietly, crossing my arm's as I glanced everywhere but him. Were we even still an item? Did I want us to be? Did he want us to be?

"Louis." I hadn't realized he moved from the chair until he was already slowly making his way toward's me. I started taking small step's back, and he followed me until he had me cornered against the counter. He lowered his face into my neck, breathing in heavily.

"Let me take you on a date." He mumbled, pressing his lip's lightly to my neck. I tensed at the touch, not sure whether to lean into it or not.

"I-I don't know Harry..." He didn't seem to accept my answer, trailing his lip's up to pull my earlobe between his teeth.

"There's so much to do around here, a-and we just got back home...." Panic was flaring up inside of me as his hand's gripped my hip's, finger's dipping right under my pant's.

"Angel..." He breathed in my ear.

'My pretty little broken angel.'

My heart stuttered at the endearment, and I squeezed my eye's shut. He started sucking a kiss right under my ear, and that's when the alarm bell's inside of me went off.

"Harry. Harry please move." I felt like the air around me was closing in, suffocating me.

"Harry please I can't breathe!!" I panicked, pushing at his chest as my own burned for oxygen. He finally stepped back with wide eye's, and I slowly slid to the ground, shaking hand's pulling at my clothes. Why was it so hot in here?

'Fucking man whore.'

Fear filled me as I pulled more frantically at my cloth's; unable to pull them off with how I was shaking. I started to sob, taking deep gasp's of air in between because I felt like my chest was being weighed down with a car.

'Does it make you feel good about yourself Louis? Letting man use you like a sex doll?'

Suddenly, cold hand's were on me, pulling my shirt over my head.

"Just breathe Lou. Just breathe. You're having a panic attack."

"H-Hot..." I whimpered, pressing the cold hand's back on my skin.

"I know...But you're okay. I promise." One of the cool hand's reached up to brush the sweaty fringe from my face, and I squeezed my eye's shut as air slowly filled my lung's again.

I cracked my eye's open a few minute's later, seeing a worried face near mine.

"You can sleep Angel, it's alright." And then the world slipped from me.

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