MISLEAD

chapter 15 : i miss you

Blessing pov

I hadn't stopped thinking about the sex I had with farian, I am still definitely scared, after that day I had seen him around the school about twice, even with all my efforts on trying to avoid him, he just seemed to be everywhere.

Tessa has been behaving weird, apart from us not speaking to each other, she has been looking pale, quite often. But that's isn't my problem.

My problem is the fact that I'm getting tired of all these life, and I still cannot believe farian kinda took advantage of me, I know he didn't force me or anything, but he took advantage of the fact that I was in a vulnerable state.

Everyone had packed their bags to go home for the mid term break, I sat in my room with my luggage's all packed, facing anima and chidinma who were also packing

"Chi chi, shey your driver would come and pick you?" I asked

" My dad called recently there's no need I'll be going on my own this time" she said looking very uncomfortable like she was hiding something.

The truth is that chidinma is very secretive and she's always hiding something, but this time it's different, like she's actually hiding something but wants to tell me and can't.

Anima put her deodorant in her side bag, zipping it up " me like this, dad says I'll spend my mid term in Mecca with mumsi, and me I don't want to go, not with my mum, she'll just make the whole trip boring" she said shrugging

"See this one o, atleast you see mecca go, me that if my driver comes to pick me, I'll go home and be bored and all alone, I just pray aunty uduak visits" I said wearing my backpack and heading downstairs to the school gate as anima and chidinma follows with their already packed bags

"Dim! dims!, this your bag big o, Na travel you dey travel?" Anima joked as chidinma ignored her walking ahead of us

"What's wrong with chidinma?" Amina asked me looking a bit worried

I Shaked my head indicating I had no idea, as Amina replied me as she sighted my mum and not my driver " this midterm is going to be an interesting one"

With shock written all over my face I replied Amina without looking directly at her but at my mum who stood outside her car waiting " I wonder what I've done now"

***

The car ride own was weird, saying weird is an understatement, it felt strange, mum kept asking me questions every 30 minutes like she was afraid to talk to me or she didn't just know how to engage in a conversation with her own daughter.

Talking to her for that few minutes felt like we were strangers, talking to each other for the first time.

I got home and walked straight into my room after greeting dad, is it that the weather is weird or is dad home earlier than I used to remember, it was just few minutes to 7 when we got home, and dad comes home nothing less than  8 o'clock, everything felt strange, mum walked to her room like she was confused as to where it is situated.

After pulling of my school wear and taking a long shower, I flung my self on my soft and cozy bed I had missed, my foam in school was good but this one at home was made with real bird feathers, dad bought it for me when I requested for a room make over for my 13th birthday, I think I'll do another makeover, this room doesn't look like that of a 16 years old, it seemed too immature. I'll change alot of things but I'll keep the bed.

My room always looked the same way I leave it whenever I plan on returning back to school, but this time it seemed like someone has been visiting the room, it wasn't this tidy the last time I left and this book, my poems, isn't supposed to be lying on my bedside table, I thought I packed them before I left, or didn't I?

I was cut out of my thoughts when the door of my room was slightly open with a light knock following

"May I come in?" Mum voice came out next.
Like seriously is that mum?, What the hell is she doing in my room?, I have to hide this poem, I thought to myself as I quickly shoved the book underneath my pillow. Mum walked in and asked if she could sit, and I told her to, shock still evident on my face.

" How are you?" Mum asked

"I'm good?"

"I know this is weird but can you please just try to loosen up a bit, I'm not here to scold you or bite, I just want to talk to you" she said with guilt and sadness all over her face

I sat down a bit more comfortable but I still found all that was happening strange " are you okay mum?" I finally found my voice

" Yes I am, I'm sorry uyai, I really am,i know it has not been easy for you too, since edet, it affected all of us, it wasn't easy for me, but I wasn't being fair, I forgot about you, how you'd handle loosing your only brother, you were just a child, I forgot about that, I let the pain of edet's death ruin our relationship, I had blamed you within me, I know you did nothing, you are not at fault, till date it still pains me that I had missed 5 years of your life, even while am still around" she said with tears coming out of her eyes.

I quickly moved forward, using my hand to wipe the tears away as i bring her close to me hugging her and trying my best not to cry. I have waited for this moment all my life.

Mum pulled back, this time holding my hands "I know I have made you feel like you were not good enough, but I've never for once stopped loving you, I always did and I still do, it just pained me whenever I looked at you, cause seeing you reminded me of your brother, I love you two, and I want to make up for those years I missed, I know it might be too late, but I want you to know that anything you need or if you ever want to talk, I'll be here, I'll always be" I hugged her again as I reply her

"I love you mum"

"I love you too baby".

Happy Tuesday❤️
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