Touchy

Chapter 12

Double upload

Anger bubbles like lava inside me. I feel like I'm going to explode; instead I end up pressing the palms of my hands into my eyes. I won't cry, especially over something as stupid as this. I won't cry. It's not worth it. God, it's worth everything to me. My friendship with Phoebe means the world to me that if I lose her over some stupid text, I'll never be accepting of myself. I never even read the text, and I'm pretty certain she didn't even, just the name. Why does a name have to make us overreact?

Out of interest, I can't help but pick up my phone. I press the notification and read the message: Have you seen the sky? And that's the big message that's made my best friend leave my house on her own terms. Pathetic. That's what I think of all of this – pathetic. Pathetically childish and completely unreasonably needed at that too. It all feels like a joke and not even one that's been taken too far, just one that's been misunderstood and blown out of proportion. Phoebe will see that when she calms down right? She'll understand. Won't she? I sincerely hope so. She just needs to think about it all, exactly like I do too.

The sound of a car engine dying and the slamming of a car door come from the front of the house making me jump to my senses. With Phoebe here, I'd completely forgotten that I was expecting mum and dad to be getting back from work soon. Now it seems like too soon though. I need time. I need space. I need fresh air. Being cooped up in the house, and kitchen at that, isn't doing me any good right now. I need to escape.

The noise of a key being turned in the front door travels through to me and I start to panic. My heart rate increases at the unlocking noise. Rationally, I conclude that it can only be mum or dad as they're the only other people, apart from me, that have a key to the house. However, my heart doesn't seem to want to be rational as it still spikes against my ribcage frantically until mum's voice echoes down the hallway. "Hello," she calls out as the clopping of her heels get louder.

"Hi, I'm in the kitchen," I reply, putting my phone into my hands in case my hands decide to start shaking or something.

"Ummm, I can tell. That cake smells delicious, I can't wait to try some later," mum answers back as she enters the kitchen, handbag dangling on her arm, clearly heavy from the folder that's best wedged inside. Unfortunately, the purple cardboard protrudes out into the open quite a bit. "Have a good day sweetie?" She asks as she plants a kiss on top of my head, dropping her bag down on the table afterwards.

The less she knows about Joanne and Facebook, the better. The less she knows about my confrontation with Phoebe, the better. I shrug my shoulders as my way of replying. If I don't have to speak, I can't say anything that I'll regret. "What about you?" I ask instead, anything to get the topic of conversation off me.

Surprisingly, she shrugs her shoulders in exactly the same way I just did. "Average, work is work as you can imagine," she says whilst pouring herself a glass of cold orange juice from the fridge. "However, I was thinking of ordering pizza to make the day better. What do you think?" She gives me a wink as if she needed to even ask the question in the first place – which she didn't. "I guess I'll grab the phone then," she says whilst smiling. My mum really is an angel that it pains me to speak up, but I do anyway as I need to.