S.A.D || zarry au

ten

~

        I stopped putting my hands on my knees gasping for air. I believed that I was far enough away to where he couldn't catch me.

        When silence settled in Zayn's room, I bolted. I fucking ran as quick and I could out of that house. I told him I was going to the bathroom, but I slipped out. Said I had to use the restroom and sneaked out the door.

        I'm so scared. So freakin' scared. I don't know what to do. When I met Zayn I figured that I'd cower away before I got in too deep. Boy, now was I deep.

        Zayn deserves better. He does.

        Maybe if I avoid him he'll stay away. Yeah, I'll do that.

        I looked up breathing heavy. I recognized the neighborhood. It was about twenty minutes from my house by car.

        I swiped out my phone and called Liam quickly. "Hey, Li, can you come pick me up?"

        "Where you at?"

        I told him my location which followed in him yelling at me why I was there and why wasn't I with Zayn.

        Used my famous "I'll explain later".

        Within about thirty minutes of sitting on a curb, Liam's car pulled up and I hopped into the passenger seat.

        "Explain, now," Liam said as he started driving into the direction of my house.

        And, I did. Every detail because there's no sense in holding anything back from Liam.

        "Harry," he breathed out when I was finished, "you shouldn't have done that."

        "I had no choice," I hissed.

        "Yes, you did, and you chose to let your fears cave in on you," he pulled into my driveway and parked.

        "Hm, seems like I do that a lot don't I?" I snap quickly exiting his car and running into my house.

        My mother wasn't home so I wasn't questioned when I bolted for my room and slammed the door. I left the front door opened knowing that Liam would make himself comfortable on the couch until I was ready to come out and talk a bit more.

        I face planted into my pillow and started screaming and crying into it.

        I was right, Liam was wrong. Zayn deserved better and I deserved nothing. That's the truth and that's how it should be.

        After I few minutes faced my ceiling and an empty, aching pain in my chest aroused. It was a familiar feeling. A feeling of sadness, loneliness, depression. It sucked, a lot, but it's something I've learned to live with; kinda.

        I eyed my dresser knowing that my razor was just sitting in there. I shook my head. No, not this time. I didn't want to walk down to Liam with blood dripping down my arm and no excuse. He doesn't need to see me in my worsted state. Liam's seen me talk about suicide, he's comforted me while I cry, and he's even skipped so many days of school just so he can make me feel better when I'm in a deep, depressed mood. But, Liam's never seen me hurt myself. He knows I've done it, do it, but he's never actually been around when or straight after it happened and I don't plan on letting that streak break today.

        I sat up from my position laying down on my bed and threw my jacket off. I stood up and walked out of the room and peaked down the stairs where I saw Liam curled on the couch with a blanket watching what sounded like Spongebob.

        Liam was a six year old trapped in a fifteen year old's body.

        I padded down the steps and Liam glanced at me, "Hey, Hazza."

        "Hey, Li," I murmured sitting in the spot next to him. He lifted up the blanket and let me under it. I curled up to his side and he draped his arm around my shoulders.

        "You okay?" he asked.

        I sighed, "A little."

        We stayed there snuggling against the couch while Liam's phone continued to buzz over and over. "Liam, get your damn phone," I groaned annoyed.

        He grabbed his phone from beside him and his eyes slightly widened. "These are for you," he then said passing his phone to me.

        "What?" I ask as I looked at the messages. I looked at the contact name: Zayn Malik. "How did you get his number?"

        "After that anxiety attack you had he gave me his and I gave him mine for safety precautions because I was afraid it'd happen again.

        My eyes skimmed over the messages.

        Liam, is Harry with you?

        He was at my house and then he just disappeared.

        Is he okay?

        "At least let the poor lad know you're okay," Liam sighed.

        I sent a simple text: He's fine.

        "You can't run from your problems for forever," Liam said as I snuggled against his side once again.

        "I know."

        That doesn't mean I sure as hell won't try.

~

So there it is! Poor Harry. Poor Zayn.

But, do not fear things will get better later! Way better!

Love!!

Tori xx