One Last Time

Chapter 17

It was
always
you.

- F. Scott Fitzgerald

Lana

It wasn't the cold winter morning that really awoke me this morning no. In fact, it was actually the gentle snoring that was right above my head and the erratic heartbeat under my ears. I furrow my brows as I felt far to comfy in this position when I do not even feel this comfortable on a normal morning, which made me wonder what was going on.

I stir in my sleep as I rub my face with my hands before I open my eyes to be welcomed with the same cologne that I've been inhaling ever since last night. I glance up to see Ivan sleeping soundly; it was like as if he was catching up on years worth of sleep.

It was at this moment that I took the opportunity to pluck out every beauty and flaw he possessed and I was gobsmacked. Ivan is beautiful just like how I remembered. Ivan is a sight for sore eyes and it was definitely because of his mother, his mom was absolutely beautiful. I remember when I first met her, how I was in so much awh because I thought I was staring at an angel. Watching Ivan now just really made me realise how much I have lost but the possibility of getting it right back in my hands were there however, I was too afraid to take it. I didn't want to risk losing myself again because if I did take that risk again, not only would I be suffering a loss but so will my daughter who is just so young.

Luckily, through his deep sleep he managed to untangle his arm around me and let me lose so I was able to get out of his hold easily, without having to wake him up. I stood up and gave myself time to actually wake up. I stretch and yawned before I went up to check on Amelia who was still asleep. The time right now was eight in the morning so I decided to let Amelia sleep for another hour or so because of the events of yesterday; it tired her out.

I freshened up before they both could wake up and then began to prepare breakfast however while I was making breakfast, the sounds of heavy foot steps caught my attention and by the time I turned my gaze to the direction of the lounge, Ivan was leaning on the kitchen counter as he rubbed his eyes.

"Morning." He croaked with his deep sleepy voice. Immediately for some odd reason, my heart fluttered in my chest.

"Morning." I turn my attention back to the stove as I was preparing pancakes for the morning, "Sleep well?"

"Yes." He answer and I looked over my shoulders again to see him smile widely at me, "Best sleep I've had in... years actually."

Just as I was about to set the plates up for the table, I turned around to grab the plate but Ivan was already in my way. In just a second, he reached the island table and leaned on but as I was not watching where I was going, I tripped over his foot when he caught me just in time. I leaned against his chest as he held both my arms and that's when we both begin to lose ourselves in each other's gazes... well I know I was going deep and losing myself.

"Can I ask you a question?" He asked and I nod my head slowly as I bite my lip. Ivan's eyes trailed down to my lips when he gulped before he exhaled, "How long have you known Stephan?"

Oh...

My expression drop when I watch him with apprehension; I really didn't want to answer that question because I was afraid of his reaction.

"Two and half years." I said and looked away from him hoping that he would let go off me but he didn't. Technically, I really didn't have to answer this question because it was none of Ivan's business however, I had the sudden urge to answer him anyway as my mouth wouldn't stop. I look back up at him and noticed how hard he was preventing himself asking another question to me but I answered it regardless despite the fact that he didn't even ask me because I could tell from his face what he really wanted to ask. "We never dated... if that's what you wanted to know."