If Walls Could Talk (Adamtina)

Chapter 19

Adam's eyes opened to a colorful abstract painting of a bird-of-paradise that was instantly familiar. As he lay on his side, the framed image falling into his line of sight, his mind hurtled back in time. Through foggy eyes, he saw himself standing there, hammering a nail into the wall before hanging the beautiful artwork they'd bought together in London.
I'm in Christina's room. Our old room.
The sudden realization nearly slapped Adam across the face as he lifted his head with the haze of morning to view the room that had once been his too. Tangible memories charged at his eyes as he appraised the furniture and ornaments, trying to work out what had changed. There were a few differences, but, mostly, the room looked very much like it did when he used to wake up here each day.
He felt his body turn heavy as it all came flooding back. The reason he was here. His break up with Claire. Showing up at Christina's place last night. Holding her in his arms as he fell asleep.
Christina.
She was nowhere to be seen and Adam just lay there for a few moments gazing at her pillow, willing himself to remember how she felt against his skin last night, but he'd slept too deeply. The sudden scent of cooking eggs found his nose and he looked to see if the clock that once lived next to her side of the bed was still there. It wasn't.
Adam folded his long legs over the edge of the bed and sat up, exhaling deeply as his mind wrestled with emotions that collided into each other. He felt like he'd been cut open and split in two. Part of him was heartbroken and disgusted at himself for waking up in another woman's bed so soon after ending his relationship. But another side of him - a bigger side - felt enamored. Christina was somewhere in this house. He still couldn't quite believe it.
He spotted his jeans and t-shirt loosely thrown over the back of a chair and slipped them back on as he exhaled heavily, deciding to spare Christina the awkward sight of him in his boxers. As he opened the bedroom door to the distant sound of clinking plates, he slipped into the bathroom and brushed his hair up a bit with his fingers, before pouring some mouthwash into his mouth and swirling it around.
He tried to steady his anxious mind with a deep breath before he entered the kitchen, feeling himself literally lose the stride in his step as he found her standing at the bench with her back to him. Her long hair was cascading down her back in unbrushed waves, her soft pink nightgown riding up above her lean, tanned thighs as she stood on her tiptoes to retrieve a plate.
Oh god.
The sight of her; fresh, natural, and sexy in the morning light flooded him with more flashbacks and he sucked in a loud breath, which made Christina spin around. A hot current shot across the room as their eyes met again, the sensation making Adam's cheeks flush.
"Morning," Christina said softly, her smile affectionate. He smiled back and took in her make-up free face, the curves of her little body cruelly camouflaged under the silky fabric that clung to her like glue. Butterflies awoke in his stomach as he looked at her slightly messy hair that made him think of how it might look after he was really done with her.
Shut the fuck up, you pervert.
"Morning," he replied tightly.
Sudden shyness painted Christina's face as she reached for the silk robe that was draped over one of her kitchen stools and slipped it on, even though the room was warm. She'd clearly noticed his eyes on her and the thought made Adam sheepish.
"I'm glad you're up," Christina said gently, "Because I made some breakfast and I - I didn't know if I should wake you... is that okay?" Her face turned hopeful as she tied up the silk belt of her robe.
Is it okay?
Adam felt his insides glowing as he walked towards the tiny girl and looked over her shoulder to view the plates of eggs, grilled tomatoes, toasts. Their bodies were standing so close together he could hear her breath.
"Of course," he said softly with a half-smile. "This looks awesome... thank you." Christina smiled with relief as she gently brushed past him, carrying the two plates, which she put on the bench. The feeling of her body against his, so close yet so far through that fucking silk thing she was wearing made his hairs stand on end.
"How did you sleep?" Christina asked softly as they sat down on opposite stools and began to eat.
"Really deep, actually," Adam replied. He nearly choked on a piece of egg at the somewhat unbelievable reality that they'd slept together last night in the same bed. And now here they were eating breakfast together again like it was three years ago.
How the hell did all this happen?
"How about you?" he asked as he looked back at her.
"Okay, thanks."
The sound of forks and knives clinking against plates continued through the air.
"You've changed a few things in your room," Adam blurted softly, trying to make conversation.
Oh yeah, like that's not awkward.
Christina's face rose in surprise. "Yeah, I guess I have," she chuckled softly. "Most of it's the same though."
He glanced around the kitchen, which opened into the living area, trying to work out what else was different. Obviously all his old things were gone.
"I haven't done much with the place," Christina answered to his silent question.
"I noticed," Adam said huskily as he took a sip of juice. Christina looked up and their eyes locked together, a charged moment between them stirring up the air.
The reality of them suddenly sitting there enjoying breakfast together like they were the most normal couple in the world made Adam feel almost faint, and he steadied himself on his stool by anchoring his foot to the floor. He suddenly didn't quite know what to do - how to be here with her. The feeling was just so intense.
"Are you okay?" Christina said softly. He looked up and saw concern filling the face of the person who still knew his moods better than anybody.
"Yeah..." he mumbled, hearing the lack of commitment in his voice.
But it was all a bit much. He'd been up less than half an hour and he was already freaking out. Waking up in a different bed, with a different woman to the one he was used to... part of it made Adam want to gag on his food. He knew deep in his heart that he wanted to be here, but so much had changed so fast. He felt breathless.
Suddenly he felt Christina wrap her soft hand around his arm. He glanced across at her gorgeous eyes that were colored with concern, her robe falling open at the top as she leaned forward, exposing the creamy tanned skin of her cleavage. Adam quickly looked down at his plate, trying not to think about what was underneath.
Okay, one minute you're totally freaking about waking up in Christina's bed, and the next minute all you can think of is dragging her back to it so you can fuck her in all manner of ways until the sun goes down. Are you a freaking head case?
"Do you want to leave?" Christina whispered. The question surprised Adam as his eyes flicked up to meet hers.
"What?" He answered softly.
Christina swallowed hard. She spoke gently, her voice sweet like music. "Well, you just look a little freaked out this morning, and I - I just want you to know that I'll totally understand if you need to go. I mean... it's a big deal you being here, and I know that, and... I just don't want you to feel like you have to stay for - for me. I mean, I'm not saying that you even want to I'm just... saying."
Adam nearly melted into his food as he watched the beautiful girl stammering nervously. He wanted to take her hand in his, just like he'd done last night, but right now he felt paralyzed.
"Chris, I want to be here," he answered softly, his eyes holding hers. "If that's okay with you, of course."
Her face flooded with affection as she smiled back at him and brushed her fingers against his arm, before removing her hand and settling back on her stool. "Of course I want you to," she said gently. "But like I said last night," she continued, her voice slightly strained with nerves, "I'm just... here for you. As a friend. You don't have to factor me into anything, just... let know what you need from me."
She was trying so hard. Adam chuckled under his breath. "Trust me," he said softly, his eyebrows raising a little. "You're kind of a factor."
You're the reason I'm not getting married anymore, Christina. You're the reason.
Christina blushed at his words and a few moments of silence passed between them. Silences were the worst right now, as the hot tension that stole the air between them intensified, demanding the empty space be filled with something they knew they both wanted. Adam felt his heart rate increase as he watched Christina's lips wrapping around the side of her glass as she drank her juice, wanting to take the cup out of her hand and just pull her mouth into his. But he knew that if he put his tongue anywhere near her body right now he probably wouldn't be able to tear it away until he'd licked up every piece of her he could get.
"What would you like to do today?" Christina asked, snapping Adam's wandering mind into focus. "I mean, what would you like to do... I didn't mean it like I was assuming you wanted to do something together."
Adam leaned forward on his stool and looked right at Christina. "Stop talking like that," he said softly as he reached out and brushed his hand down the side of her hair. "You don't need to be this way."
Christina swallowed tightly. "What way?"
Adam slid his body a little closer to hers. "Like you have to be careful all the time about wanting me to be here, to spend time with you."
Christina's face turned crimson, her breath becoming louder as Adam's fingers drifted across to her cheek, giving it a soft stroke before he brushed his thumb across her lip.
He could hear his heart thumping in his ears. "Christina, I'm here because of you. Because I want to be here." Christina just looked back at him lovingly, the soft skin of her cleavage lifting with heavy breaths as his mind whirred.
"I'd kind of like to stay here today, actually," Adam said, feeling a little shy at the request.
Christina's eyebrows rose a little in surprise. "At the house?"
He nodded. "I just... I really don't feel like facing the world today. I just want to hang out here with you and do nothing, if that's okay."
I just can't be anywhere else right now.
Christina's face couldn't hide how pleased she was. "Of course."
Adam's chest pinched with a trace of guilt that part of him also didn't want to venture out with Christina today in case he was photographed with her and Claire saw the photos.
But the greater reason was her. Just being with her in this house again. It was all his heart could take.
***
Adam stretched his long legs out in front of him, letting the sun warm them through his jeans as he held his phone up to his ear.
"How are you doing?" Patsy's gentle voice filtered through the line.
Adam sighed, still feeling knocked around, like he was recovering from war wounds. "A bit better today," he replied softly as he gazed out at Christina's back garden.
"That's good to hear. You sound a little better... are you still with Jake?"
"No, I'm..." He swallowed tightly. "I'm at Christina's."
"Oh.... Okay," Patsy said softly.
"How did you go?" Adam asked, not wanting to talk about that any further.
"Well, I've spoken to most people and left messages with the rest. I'm hoping they'll call back, but I'll try them again a bit later. Your brother wanted to call you but I told him to give you a couple of days."
"Oh, cool... thanks." Adam exhaled heavily and stared at the pool, feeling bizarrely envious of its calmness. "How did most people react?" His brow furrowed.
"Well, some actually already knew... Claire had already called a few people on her side herself, which isn't surprising."
Adam's stomach plunged into a dark place at the sound of Claire's name and he felt his breakfast curdling in his stomach. He'd been trying so hard not to think about her, despite her wide green eyes still plaguing so many of his thoughts.
"And the rest... well, they were quite surprised as you can imagine," Patsy continued. "But everybody's been very understanding and everybody expressed a lot of concern for you. You truly have wonderful friends, Adam."
For some reason that only made him feel more like shit. He hated disappointing so many people.
"Adam..." Patsy said gently, her tone changing to apprehensive. "I really think you should call Claire." Adam felt his face wince as his mom continued. "I spoke to her today."
Adam felt weak. "You did?"
"Well, after I started calling people and they were saying she'd already told them, I - I wanted to avoid doubling up on calls.... but to tell you the truth, Adam, I also felt like I wanted to see how she was doing."
"Yeah... of course," Adam replied tightly, as he dropped his forehead into his hands. "How is she?" He whispered, his voice so soft it could barely be heard.
"I think you need to call her, Adam." Patsy repeated softly. "She sounded... well, okay, I guess, under the circumstances. She was just very focused on the wedding details. We didn't really talk about much else as she clearly wasn't up to it. But she did say she hadn't heard from you, and she sounded a bit hurt by that."
Adam felt like he could cry. Had not calling Claire made him an even bigger asshole? But call her about what? What more was there to say?
"Yeah," he whispered, not sure what else he should say. "Well, thanks so much again for calling everyone."
"Of course, darling," Patsy said gently. "By the way, Claire also said she's told the wedding coordinator what happened, who will let the others know, like the venue, the caterers, and the rest."
Oh shit. "I hadn't even thought about any of that." What a dick you are, Adam.
Adam went to say something, but Patsy was already talking again. "What are your plans for tomorrow?" she asked gently. "Would you like to do something together?"
Adam swallowed hard. He was still thinking about how he wanted to spend his would-be wedding day, and he'd only really come up with one idea that had any appeal to him. But he didn't want to get in that conversation with his mom right now.
"Thanks so much, mom, but I - I think I'm just gonna lay low."
After chatting to her a bit longer, Adam eventually hung up and stared at his phone for a while, letting the depression that he was trying so hard to fight claim him for some more time. He knew he should really call Claire and see how she was, but he was just so freaking terrified. Plus, Christina was right on the other side of the door, and if she walked out while he was mid-conversation he'd probably have a panic attack and drown himself in the pool.
Instead, he thumbed through the screen of his iPhone to make another call. He wanted to make sure he filled the hole of tomorrow with the only thing he really wanted to do in his heart.