Lee Felix Is Not Okay | Changlix

Chapter 2

Felix opened his eyes and blinked the sleep out of them. He looked around and tried to figure out where he was but it was too dark and Felix was honestly a little paranoid.

Felix suddenly noticed that he felt something warm wrapped around him and he panicked for a second. His eyes then adjusted to the dark and he looked to his side to see none other than the face of Seo Changbin breathing softly next to him, his arms wrapped around Felix. Felix flushed and tried to shake off the butterflies he was feeling.

He decided the best thing to do was probably to wake Changbin up, he also needed an explanation as to how he got where he was. And so he pulled his arm out from Changbin's grasp and nudged him in the side then shook him to try and wake him up. After a few seconds, he heard Changbin groan and he quickly pulled his hand away.

"Changbin? Wake up." Felix spoke softly and Changbin opened his eyes slightly and looked up at Felix.

"You're awake..." Changbin's voice was raspy and tired and Felix would be lying if he said it wasn't amazing.

Changbin turned over and let Felix out of his grasp and Felix was kind of sad that the warmth was gone. Over Changbin's shoulder Felix could see light coming from what he assumed was Changbin's phone.

"It's 1am." Changbin put his phone down and turned back on his side to face Felix. They were close and Felix could feel Bin's breathing on his face.

Felix tried to calm down. "Yeah...how did I get here again?" The last thing Felix remembered was blacking out at JYP's get together.

Changbin looked at Felix and frowned. "I found you crying in the bathroom at the JYP thing last night. I tried to calm you down but you passed out in my arms." Changbin looked sheepishly at Felix. "I had to get Woojin to help me bring you back to the dorms."

Felix reddened and he muttered a quiet "sorry..."

Changbin quickly looked back to Felix "No, no! It's not your fault...oh and you woke up at some point on the way to the dorms. Only for a minute though and then you fell asleep. Woojin and I didn't want to leave you alone so I agreed to stay in here with you incase you woke up..."

"Oh, thank you." Felix gave a small smile to Changbin and now it was his turn to get flustered (Which did not go unnoticed by Felix).

"It's really no problem, I care about you after all." Changbin returned Felix's smile.

The boys laid there for a little while, just looking at each other. Admiring one another. They got closer, and closer, and infinitely closer.

Felix felt those nervous butterflies in his stomach again as he looked Changbin in the eyes.

Changbin's eyes fluttered closed and he moved even closer to Felix, and Felix panicked. He jerked back and his head hit the wall behind him hardly.

Changbin immediately sat up and pulled Felix's head into his chest "Are you okay oh my god!"

Felix pushed Changbin away and he felt tears start to stream down his face, half from the physical pain and have from the emotional. "Go away!" Felix practically screamed and Changbin flinched but stayed put.

Felix kept up telling Changbin to leave until his voice was just a whisper.

"Please...go away." Felix was still crying.

Changbin looked pained and worried but Felix was looking down. He pulled the blonde haired boy closer one last time and pecked him gently on the top of his head, then he stood. Changbin left the room and closed the door behind him, eyes watering and tears almost escaping.

Felix still sat on his bed, shaking and looking down. He was still crying but the stream had slowed down.

"Why..." He sounded torn apart and tired and he once again, felt like dying.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*BEEP, BEEP, BEEP*

Felix awoke to the loud, ear piercing sound of his alarm. He rolled over and checked the time. 6:30 AM. About two hours after Felix had finally managed to fall asleep. He groaned and rolled back over in bed, intent on falling asleep again, until the memories from earlier that morning arose in his head. Felix buried his head in his pillow and groaned a second time even louder. He practically forced himself to sit up and sat for a moment trying to wake up completely. At that moment a cheerful looking Jeongin burst into his room.

"Wake up Felix-hyung~! It-oh, you're already up!" Jeongin smiled brightly at Felix and told him to get dressed. "Channie is taking us out for breakfast, so hurry up!" Jeongin left Felix's room and closed the door behind him.

"How can someone be so cheerful at 6 in the morning.." Felix mumbled as he stood to get dressed. He could already tell this was going to be a long day and he hadn't even seen Changbin yet.

Felix dressed first in a t-shirt and jeans before he looked at his wrists and realized he'd better wear a sweater. And so he did, He ended up in a white sweater and black jeans.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The ride to the breakfast place was fine. Felix and Jisung were being loud and Jeongin was asking Woojin if they were there yet and Chan's eye was twitching. Seungmin was laughing at Hyunjin who was talking to Changbin who was staring at Felix. And of course Minho was watching Jisung. Things almost felt normal for Felix as if things were actually okay and all was right again.

When they all arrived at the restaurant, they sat at a large, half circle shaped booth. Felix sat beside Jisung and Changbin was across the table from him. Felix honestly wanted to avoid Changbin at all costs. He knew he was in love with Changbin, he just didn't want to be. It was wrong, what would his family thing? His friends? The memories of that morning would not escape Felix. Was Changbin trying to kiss him? Or was Felix just being delusional. A part of him wished Changbin was trying to kiss him, but a larger part hoped he wasn't.

"Felix? Hello? What are you thinking about ordering?" Felix was pulled from his thoughts by Jisung beside him and he turned to look at him.

"Oh, uh, I haven't really thought about it yet..." Felix felt dumb and decided to actually open his menu. He was afraid of ordering for himself honestly, he felt like a child.

"Maybe I'll just get whatever you're getting." Felix voiced to Jisung.

Jisung looked to Felix and smiled softly "Okay, I'll order it for you then."

Felix felt relieved and he moved his head to take in his surroundings. He saw Minho talking to Seungmin and Hyunjin, Woojin talking with Chan and Jeongin, and finally, he saw Changbin staring at him. Felix met his eyes. Changbin looked worried. Felix looked away.

Changbin was worried about Felix. He has known for a while that he hasn't been quite himself lately but perhaps it's worse than he first thought. After Felix's panic attack last night and then his meltdown that morning, Changbin was definitely more than just a little worried about Felix. He knew Felix wasn't okay and he wanted to help him. But he didn't think Felix wanted anything to do with him right now. He felt like he had to confront him, maybe later in the dorms. Changbin just wanted Felix to be okay, and he wanted to help him with that.

The waitress approached their table with bored look on her face. "Are you ready to order?" Chan looked around and confirmed that they were indeed ready to order and they went around the table ordering what they wanted. When she got to Jisung he ordered pancakes and let the waitress know that Felix would be having the same. The waitress closed her book."That'll be out as soon as possible." The waitress left their table to bring the kitchen their order and chatter at the table resumed once again.

"Hey Felix, I thought you didn't like pancakes?" Felix noticed Changbin talking to him from across the table.

"Well, they're okay..." Felix responded sheepishly before turning to converse with Jisung and Minho.

When the food got to their table, Felix took a bite of his food and decided he could honestly go without. They left and Felix had barely touched his food.