My Life

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My life ,
It has no advantage
My life never advances

I smile but
They know deep inside I'm growing sadness ,
This little thing called life
I just can't understand
But even though it beats me down
Still I remain standing ,
Sick of lies ,
The pain I have inside is everlasting
From being friends with everyone just to see ,
Non of them lasted
They said they'll be here forever x
Never thought they would vanish
What happened?

Why do I compare myself to the next person ?
I should love myself
Questioning my existence doesn't help
Stuck in spiralling depression
Nothing can get me up
I wonder if I'm the only one
Who has been in this slamp

"No matter how high you jump ,
You just get yourself over the hump"

And you try a different way to climb it
While wondering ,
How did you even get inside
It feels like floors are lowered
And the world is rising
Leaving you at the bottom trying
Harder and harder to reach it with discouraging ways to try it...

Does no one see the position I'm standing?
My biological parents don't understand me
Sometimes its hard to call family 'family'
When in reality its me not getting attention ,
And I always get screwed when you know I don't deserve it
My life may look it ,
But isn't perfect
I feel worthless
Like if I died everyone's life would be great
Because I am a burden

My grandma is certain that I make everyone's life hell
So for real I gotta say
I honoured to close these curtains

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