Running from You

20

"Now, sweetie, we're just going to go by the store for a minute before we leave. We're driving past Dean's house, so we can drop him off".
Lucas stares at his mom, a blank stare that tells me he doesn't care for the way his mom is talking to him. It's annoying me too, she's acting like he's a little kid. He's not stupid, he's just... Energetic.

I look over at  Mr Farell, Lucas's dad. He's glaring at his son with a cold expression. It's making me feel nervous, and I don't know why. Something in his light green eyes is telling me he's not too happy about the sudden decision to move to Paris either. His gaze glides past the packed suitcases and bags, to the taxi pulling up in front of the house. They sold their car two days ago. It wasn't hard, it's a very nice car. Suddenly, I feel the cold eyes fixated on me. I look down nervously, as the man clears his throat.
"We should get in" he says. We all nod, grabbing a suitcase and stuffing them in the trunk of the taxi.

We all get in, and we drive over to my house. Mr Farell is sitting next to the taxi driver in the front, his wife sitting by the window in the backseat. I'm sitting at the other window, pressed up against the door. Lucas is sitting in the middle, his hair falling over his eyes.
"I like your hair sweetie" Mrs Farell says, brushing her hand through Lucas's hair. He gently slaps her hand away.
"Dean did it" he says. "Because you know I can't do it without looking like an idiot".
I repress the urge to say he always does, because the tension in the car is so thick that I know it'll upset him if I said it now.

The car stops in front of my house.
"Now, we're going to go shopping. On the way back we'll drive past here again" Mrs Farell explains. "So if you want Lucas, you can get out and we'll pick you up on the way back. That way you can say goodbye properly".
Mr Farell makes a grumbling noise, but his wife kicks his seat to shut him up.
"Okay" Lucas says, and we get out of the car. Lucas's mom shuts the door, and the taxi drives away.

We're both quiet for a moment, until the car is around the corner and out of sight. Lucas sighs, and turns to me.
"So, this is it" he says.
"I guess so" I say. I stare at him, taking in every detail I can see in the dark. There's a lonely street light standing near us, the light reflecting of Lucas's eyes just a little too much for my comfort.
"It's not like we'll never see each other again" I say. "We'll chat, and Skype, and I can come over during my break".
"Yeah, that's true" Lucas says, and he nods a little too enthusiastically. Like he's trying to convince himself. I can't judge him though because I'm doing the exact same thing.

I look at him, and suddenly feel a strange feeling rush through me. I just let it happen. A week ago I would've held it back, but lately I've been getting so many strange feelings that I've stopped being scared of them. But this feeling isn't so much a physical feeling, it's something in my brain.
Tell him.
The voice of my own thoughts startles me.
You should tell him.
Maybe Jay and Alex have slipped me some kind of truth serum. They've been bugging me to tell Lucas about my crush on him. If that's even what I can call it, because it doesn't feel like it'll just wash over anymore. Every day I waited until school was over just so I could see him again, and every time he smiles at me, I feel a rush of satisfaction.
It's the least you could do, maybe it'll cheer him up a little.
I resist the urge to shake my head in order to make the thoughts go away. Lucas would notice and ask about it. Right now, he's staring into the sky, fiddling with his hoodie strings. He turns to me.

"Hey, you never told me who you like".
I frown, processing those words for a moment, and then I feel my eyes widening.
"I never asked about it because it got kind of overshadowed by the whole dad thing" he says quietly. "But I'm really curious".
I open and close my mouth a few times, trying to think of what to say.
Just say that you like HIM. He deserves to know why you've been acting so strange the last few days.
"I, uh... I don't know?" I stutter. He stares at me for a moment, and then laughs quietly. Maybe it's more of a scoff.
"Okay, you don't have to tell me. I just thought you could say it as a going away present or something".
"I already gave you the hoodie" I point out.
"Oh, right. Shit" he says, now chuckling for real. "Then just tell me because you love me so much".
Hey! You do love him so much!
I close my eyes, squeezing them shut for a second, and then let out a long breath. Shut up, mind. Besides, I've never said that I actually love him. Not romantically, anyway. It's just a silly crush.