suicidio

Alone

I was left alone in the hospital today

Because my doctor thought it would fix me. 

You wanna know what I think? 

I think he was trying to make me suicidal again,

Because that’s what happened.

He says it’s because I’m not working on anything.

But he doesn’t know how hard I’ve been trying.

Trying to live and not die.

Trying to feel better.

Trying to be happy.

I put myself in boxes at the time,

Throw away the key.  

I’m stuck.  

But when I finally started looking for the key again, 

He locked me in a smaller box and dangled the key over my head.  

I’ve never wanted to die more.  Right when I was starting to see the light,

He turned off the sun.  

After two hours of being alone, I broke down crying.

I’ve cried more today than I have in two months.  

Why am I being punished like this? 

Is it because I hurt myself? 

You act like I’m not punished enough every single day.