Adopted by One Direction

Sunday the Day of Rest

I lay in bed, tossing and turning, unable to fall asleep. I had been getting a lot less sleep since I heard the 'you'll be going to boarding school' news, due to nerves and partly depression. In the daytime, probably no one would think anything was out of order, but if someone happened to look into my mind, they would know that something was wrong. Nowadays, I just didn't know how to feel. I was always angry at the boys, but that didn't stop me from missing them. My life was just in such a mess, all my emotions were mixed together, and worst of all, the boys were distancing themselves from me. I know it had only been an evening, but it was already obvious that they were acting differently than usual.

I had laid in my bed for several hours, not being able to sleep. The hallway outside was already dark, and I could hear no sound of the boys talking. Wait I sat up suddenly, straining my ears to hear the sound I had heard just a few seconds ago. Yes, there it was. Faint sobs coming from a few rooms down from mine. It didn't take a genius to find out who it was.

I slipped out of bed and headed down the hallway towards the direction of the sobs. Normally I would have been scared of the dim hallway, but now my mind was concentrated on something else. I went into the room tentatively, making no sound. He gave no sign that he knew I was there. I stood by his bed silently, watching his shoulders falling up and down with each sob, hearing the cries coming from his throat that sounded like a wounded puppy. Every time I opened my mouth to announce my presence, something seemed to stop me. I had no idea why. I just stood there, fighting with my own mind, watching on as he continued to cry. Those cries sounded so desperate, so hopeless, so full of pain that even the most heartless person would've been moved by it. But yet, I remained where I was, listening to the heart-breaking sobs that broke my heart as well.

In what seemed like an eternity, I finally won over my own mind and reached my hand out. I touched that messy blonde hair lightly, enough to let him know that I was there. When Niall turned around to face me, he didn't seem at all surprised. A little smile filled his tear-streaked face. He held out his arms, and I fell into them willingly. "Don't cry, Niall," I said soothingly, as I felt his body shaking with tears. "I'm here, I'm here. It's alright."  We seemed to understand what each other was thinking without speaking out loud. Niall suddenly held me tight, his fingernails digging into my shoulders so that I could barely move. He didn't let go, holding onto me almost fiercely.

"You need to let go, Niall," I said firmly. "You need too. You heard what Liam said, I have to go. But I'll come back for you, I promise." Niall was like a little frightened kid, and I was the calming mother. Niall listened to everything I said, while I comforted him. To be truthful, I think that I was the one who needed comforting, but by comforting Niall, I was in a way comforting myself too. "I can't let you go!" Niall wept desperately. "You can't leave me! I can't live without you, I'll miss you too much!" "I feel exactly the same too," I said, rubbing his back, "But there's no other solution now, I guess we'll just have to try don't we?" "I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't. "Niall kept mumbling. "Yes, you can, Niall." I said, "You still have the boys!"

It took another half an hour of me repeating the same sentence for him to calm down. Slowly, his sobs subdued and in its place was only a shivering Niall. In his matching pyjamas with his messy hair and wet eyes, he really looked like a little kid. I tucked him into the covers firmly and climbed in after him. "I'm sorry." He said after a few minutes, his voice suddenly steady and calm. "I should be the one comforting you, not the other way round! You're right, I still have the boys but you'll be all alone." I gave him a bright smile. "I'll probably survive. I mean, I survived my dad and the orphanage and my uncle, boarding school shouldn't be that hard. It's the 'not being with you guys' part that's hard."

"Me too. Life without you before was normal, but now I've been with you, I realized that I just can't go back to normal. It'll be so boring and lonely." "Yeah. Before it seemed so normal just seeing you, but when I think that I won't be seeing you for a month, even looking at you seems interesting." Niall propped himself up on his elbows and stared at me intently. It was like he was X-Raying my face. "What?" "I'm trying to memorize your entire appearance. You should be OK. If you ever want to see us then you can just buy a poster. But unfortunately, there is no Passion Tomlinson poster."