stargazing. || soongyu

⇸ one.

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a small warning;

to give a heads up, this story does contain stories and actions of abuse and includes an abusive relationship. there's also self-harm and talk of depression, anxiety, etc.

if these topics make you sensitive, this book isn't a recommended read. it's not too heavy, but it is a minor factor in the story.

for those who are going to stay, i hope you enjoy the story! ♡

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thump, thump, thump.

the sound of soonyoung's heartbeat blared into his ears, the sound filling up the whole room. his heart was racing a million miles a minute. all he wanted to do was escape from the hell he was trapped into.

"what are you doing in there? get the hell out!"

the man's voice pierced into soonyoung's head, the tears coming from his eyes never stopped. they flowed all down until his cheeks and eyes were stained a bright red. he was shaking, swaying around like a small child who just got yelled at.

"i'm sorry, please come out now. i promise not to do anything."

his heart broke for what felt like the hundredth time that month. he knew every single one of those words was a flat out lie, yet he couldn't help but feel bad. why couldn't he trust him?

because in his heart, he knew it was all lies. the way he would manipulate and abuse soonyoung, it was too much for him at this point. but he couldn't escape. the relationship he thought was sunshine and rainbows was now a dark thunderstorm. he just wanted it to stop raining so he could move on. yet, no matter what, he couldn't escape. he always came back.

"i mean it, please come out. we need to talk."

soonyoung already had lost his focus and was too scared to get up or even intentionally move a muscle. he couldn't, he wouldn't. he would make his escape once and for all, he just needed to plan it out better.

the blonde boy sat within the small, dark room. it was actually a closet, the blinds on the doors bringing in the small source of light that came from the lamp. it was early evening, and the couple got into yet another fight. but it was about asparagus.

he didn't even care anymore. no longer did he want to do this, especially over fucking asparagus. so to get away from the problems for now, soonyoung dozed off into a sleep, hoping to wake up the next day.

but when he woke up, it was still dark, and the lamp was still on. it clearly hasn't been too long, but he could feel his body was a lot stronger and still ached in the areas where new purple and blue bruises were beginning to form once again, covering the older ones from just a few days ago. except now, there was one on the right side of his face. right on the apple of his cheek.

tears began to flow again, and he sobbed into his knees that were shaking and covered in bruises too. he felt so hopeless, lying around the apartment like a ragdoll that was only used to be beaten up. he didn't want to be a doll anymore, he wanted to feel loved like a normal human.

he finally brushed away the tears, there were no more to even come out now. he had cried away whatever was left in his system, and now he just wanted some fresh air. it was tight in the small closet, the smell of his and his boyfriend's clothes filled the air and made him nearly suffocate.

quietly, he opened the closet door and peeked around the room, but no one was in there. it was dead silence. he stood up, walking slowly out of their bedroom and into the main area of the apartment. it was empty.

he must have left, thank god. soonyoung thought as he grabbed one of his hoodies and sweatpants before heading outside.

the skies were open and clear that night, the moon shining brightly down onto the city. the stars were delicately scattered along the navy sky, forming thousands of unknown patterns and giving for a beautiful night.

the weather was nearly perfect, no need for large layers or going near naked. it was amazing. the fresh air circulated through soonyoung's nose, the smell of fresh wet grass and smoke. even though it wasn't too pleasant of a scent, it was still better than that rusty old closet.

soonyoung walked until he made it to the meadow near his complex. he laid down, the grass dry enough not to make him cold. he moved the dry, bleach blonde hair out of his eyes to properly focus on the view in front of him. the sky.

he absolutely adores everything about astronomy. that's what he wanted his career to be, yet he wasn't able to go to college. he got persuaded out of doing it, and he still regrets it to this day. the young love made him do stupid decisions he wishes he could take back.

he always was able to take it away by looking around, finding small patterns in the sky with the tiny but buzzing stars. stargazing, he would call it. it was his favourite thing to do in the whole world besides singing. he loved to sing just as much and write songs and play the guitar, yet he wasn't allowed.

it was almost like he was living with his mother, being restricted from doing what he loves and being forced to do the things she likes. yet, he wasn't living with his mother.

he was living with his abuse boyfriend, jeon wonwoo.

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