Chap. 15 ♪ "Amends"

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Aya Weathers

"So, what's the deal between you and Chris? I haven't seen no TMZ reports, Shaderoom posts, y'all haven't even been spotted leaving the same building. Are you two still on bad terms?" Karilyn asked me as we sat together by the outdoor fountain at the mall.

"Yeah. He hasn't been at the studio. It's been 3 days, it's starting to get ridiculous." I guess Chris is still in his lil' feelings over what happened. I could honestly care less though. He can't be mad at me for speaking my truth. If that's how I felt, then that's just how it's gonna be. His little attitude ain't finna change nothing either.

"Ugh, y'all are so annoying." She rolled her eyes and took a sip of her iced tea. Y'all? You all? Us two? The two of us?

"No, Chris is annoying." I emphasized his name.

"No, you two. Chris is being childish, while you can't accept the fact that people can change." She came for my whole entire character.

"It's not even about change. I don't want him." I continued to put on my tough-to-crack facade.

"Correction, you want him, but you're so scared of getting hurt again that you deny the feeling in hopes that it will completely go away. However, since that is not going as planned, you're showing off this heartless act that is not that hard to see through." She completely bashed my heart in.

Did I mention that Karilyn's profession is a certified marriage counselor? She wants to go back to school and get her PhD to be a clinical psychologist.

"Or I just don't like him like that." I still tried to cover myself up, but she wasn't going for it.

"Remember when we went shopping for the Grammys and you were telling me how you and Chris got together? What was it that you said? 'I don't necessarily need to set barriers on myself to succeed'? Take your own advice, Aya." She advised me. How the fuck she remember that shit? That was 2 whole chapters ago.

"It was made up, Karilyn. It was just an excuse." I sighed heavily.

"Don't lie to me. Aya, you need to relax yourself. Ever since Teddy you act like you don't give a fuck. I get that he hurt you, but sitting here saying you'll never love again will only make you look weak." Karilyn was now scolding me.

"Stop calling him that." I mumbled, forking my orange chicken. I'm not even hungry anymore.

"Risks are made to be taken, mistakes are meant to be made. Teddy was a risk taken, a mistake made, and a lesson learned." She mentioned that bum ass nigga again.

"Can we please talk about something else?" I pleaded with an eye roll.

"No, somebody needs to tell you what you need to hear. Stop letting yourself be vulnerable and making other people vulnerable in the process because you don't have the nerve to accept that nobody is fucking perfect. Chris makes mistakes. A lot. But he's trying to learn. Your presence is helping him learn. Now I'm not saying that you have to jump into a relationship with him at this very moment, but help him learn, Aya. Help him so you can help yourself."

"I'm scared, Karilyn. I'm fucking scared because I don't want to go through that type of heartbreak again." My head was beginning to pound, just thinking about what happened.

"I understand. We're grown, Aya. You were so worried about letting a failed relationship, or a man in general stop your bag. But what's happening right now, Aya? When you and Chris were on good terms, you produced a #1 hit. Now you're arguing and he won't even come into the studio. Let go of your pride."

"Fine," I gave in because she was right. "If this goes wrong, can I sue you?" I asked, causing her to chuckle.

"No, but you can say you told me so."

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