Hiding Myself From Loving You (A Before You Exit-KPOP Fan Fiction)

Chapter 10

Hiding Myself From Loving You
Chapter 10:

[Gem's POV]

Dang it, Gem. You were slipped by those words on your mouth. Youre so careless. Pabo-ya! Ughhhhh I didnt realized I already said it, leaving Connor a question mark on those words. And I also shouldnt tell him about my feelings for Riley...but yeah...I was already been slipped. But I still have to pretend.

"N-nothing, Con. Dont mind wha-"

"Dont fool me, Gem. I know there's something with those words." Connor shouted at me. This is the first time he shouted like that in front of me, and I deserved it. T.T

"I-I'm so sorry, Connor..." I continued crying.

"WHAT. IS. IT, GEM? JUST TELL ME RIGH--"

"I'm leaving for Korea tomorrow..."

I finally told him the truth, and as I expected, Connor was really shocked on that news cos he really couldnt believe it. He must be so worried bout Riley's emotional condition right now, and I understand it. He was also shocked cos he didnt expect that I'd be gone tomorrow, but he didnt knew that I'd be leaving for good.

"W-wh-why is it so sudden, Gem, and why do you have to leave?" Connor's reaction's really panicking.

"I'm really so sorry Connor if I told you this today, but I just gained my courage to tell you bout this. I really dont know how to tell this to you guys, especially Riley...I just really don--"

"Do you think not telling Ri about you leaving us would affect his emotional condition? You just made it worst..." His words really stabbed me to be honest. He's right.

"I wanna find myself, Connor..." I sobbed so hard that I almost couldnt breathe anymore, "I wanna find my true identity and my true feelings. It's not my intention to hurt you guys, but...I just need some more time..."

Connor still gave me his warm hug and although it hurts him as well, he did support my decision.

"Are you really sure on that decision?"

"Yes..."

"Then I'll be missing you so much, Gem..." He started to cry.

"I miss you too Con and also your brothers. You know what... I'm missing him so much but I really have to--"

"Sssshhh..." he put his finger on my lips, "dont worry. I know he would understand. Just let me handle this, okay?"

"Thanks again, Con. You're really my friend."

"When will you come back?"

His question made my body frozen a bit. I know it's hard for him to tell him that I wont go back here, so I still had to pretend...

"I-I dont know, Con. I dont know."

"Then we'll be waiting for you anytime you come back..."

"Thanks...."

"Dont thank me silly. Youre my close friend, so yeah...^^"

"Well, thank you for being with me all the time since childhood, same as Riley and Toby. I would be nothing without you guys."

"Dont be such a drama queen, Gem," he chuckled, "We're a family, right? We're helping each other..."

"But I feel so guilty right now, Con..."

"You must be...hahahaha jusy joking."

I playfully punched his arm again as he teased me.

"I hate you Con! XDD" I told him jokingly in Korean.