I woke up the next morning, staring blankly at the ceiling as I recalled Leon's pained expression when I blurted out those cruel, mindless words yesterday.
I need to apologise.
Determined, I tugged the blanket aside and struggled to push myself off the bed. Grabbing the IV hanger and a crutch, I shambled into the bathroom. I leaned against the sink and looked at myself in the mirror while squirting some toothpaste on the bristles of my toothbrush.
Although the bruises and swellings had faded, I still looked terrible. Face sunken with shadows under my eyes. I pushed the toothbrush into my mouth and lifted my shirt up. My fingers traced all the sutures that closed the multiple lacerations on my body and smoothed over my jutted out ribs. I had lost so much weight since I couldn't eat until a week ago and the thought of being fed through a tube made me shudder uncomfortably.
I let go of my shirt, allowing it to fall back down to cover my horrendous-looking body. At least I am still alive. I can weather through this. I reminded myself. It doesn't matter how many nights I had to go through sleeping meagre hours because of all those nightmares and how many times I fall while trying to get those weak legs to work, I would get through this. For Mom, for Leon, for Clara.
I quickly brushed my teeth and limped my way to the door. I hadn't left my ward by myself since I was hospitalised. I thought since I took the first step, I would ask Leon to take a stroll with me. I could also use this chance to apologise to him for last night too. My hands reached out to grab the door and I turned around, feeling really proud of myself. I can do this. I was so happy and I wanted to show it off to Leon.
I pushed the door slightly and heard something that brought me to a complete stop.
I heard Leon laughing.
Peeking outside, he sat on the row of waiting chairs outside the ward, talking to Tyson and Mabel. He looked relaxed, with his back leaning entirely against the back of the chair and his legs folded in a comfortable position. He was smiling and laughing at something that Tyson had just said. I hadn't seen him like that since I woke up. It was like he was permanently worried and sad when I am around.
It was as though someone tried to force a blunt needle into my heart, it hurts so badly. I pushed the door close silently, knowing that perhaps it wasn't a good time for me to show myself. I turned around, looked at my empty ward and sighed. I bit down on my lower lip as I dragged myself back to the bed.
Maybe I should give Leon a break. I should give him some time alone or let him spend it with his friends. He had been spending way too much time in the hospital with me — so much that it felt as though I was taking all the sunshine away from his life. The only time Leon ever leave me was when he needed to run off for a meeting or class, but he always made sure someone was around me.
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Status Quo | ✓
Romance❝𝒄𝒂𝒏 𝒂 𝒌𝒊𝒔𝒔 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒆 𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒖𝒔 𝒒𝒖𝒐?❞ ━━━━━━━━━━ Rachelle Anderson moved to Massachusetts for two reasons: to pursue her dream of being a cellist and to pursue her childhood friend, Leon Taylor. Rachelle and Leon had been fri...