Bittersweet Love

Chapter 20

Logan's point of view:

I feel much better today. During breakfast, Camille came by to check on me. Because Gustavo doesn't need us today, Kendall suggested that we could go to the pool. However, I told the guys to go ahead because I wanted to ask Camille about her dad.

"And there were really no problems with your dad yesterday?" I ask Camille as I gather my things for the pool. Her annoyed sighing is unmistakable. "For the fifth time, Logan: No, there were no problems. On the contrary, he even asked me how you are."

"That's weird," I mumble to myself.

"Logan, stop thinking about my dad." Her voice sounds so cold that I turn to her in surprise. She crosses her arms. "What?"

"I … I'm just surprised how upset you are."

"It's no wonder," she sighs. "Every girl would be upset that her boyfriend thinks more of her father than of her."

Her words make me think. "Does it really look like that?" I ask uncertainly. Camille nods seriously. Slowly, I approach her and put my arms around her. "I'm sorry. But I assure you that I really prefer to think of you."

Now she smiles and leans her head against my chest. "Can we agree on something?"

"On what?" I ask curiously.

"Not worrying about my dad until there's a reason for it." She looks up at me hopefully, and at that moment, I realize that I will agree with her, of course. I would do anything for her. I nod and smile. "OK."

She looks very relieved and kisses me briefly. "We should go to the pool now. The guys are probably waiting for us."

I nod, take my bag and go out of the room with her.

We reach the elevator. As I reach out to press the button, I suddenly freeze. And memories of yesterday come up: darkness, narrowness, no air …

"Logan? What's wrong?"

I can't answer. Then I feel her lips on my cheek and hear her voice in my ear, "Come on, let's take the stairs. It's okay."

"No … that's silly," I reply reluctantly, but I'm still unable to press the button. Her hand encloses mine and she pulls me away from the elevator. When we reach the staircase and have the first stair behind us, I stop. "Now you think I'm a coward," I mumble, not daring to look at Camille. She stops too. "Of course not. Claustrophobia is nothing to be ashamed of. Many people suffer from it. There's nothing wrong with that."

"I wish I could be cooler."

"Logan, if I had wanted a cool boyfriend then I could have picked Kendall or James, but I picked you."

"Thanks," I say sarcastically. Camille shakes her head and grabs my shoulders. "Logan, I love you. All I want is you. And for me it's not bad at all if something like this happens. On the contrary, I'm happy if I can help you with such a thing and be there for you. Even though I would prefer that you didn't have to suffer like that, of course. But you really don't need to be ashamed of these things. I love you and that will not change."

I nod and take a deep breath to calm down myself. Then I smile at her lovingly. "Do you know how perfect you are?" I whisper and kiss her. For a few seconds we stay in this position, then I feel that Camille wants to pull back. Instead I press her lightly against the wall and deepen the kiss …

Later:

The pool area is full as always, but still Camille and I manage to get a seat in one of the pool tents. So we have at least a little privacy. And no, we didn't do it in the staircase. Although I can't deny that I find it increasingly difficult not to think about it. I'm worried about that. I don't want to be one of those guys who thinks of one thing all the time. Hopefully that will change soon. But I can only think of one way to change it, but unfortunately this is out of the question at the moment.

Camille's voice interrupts my thoughts, "Did you talk to them about it?" Her eyes are on Kendall and Carlos, who are romping around in the water and James, who is lying on a pool chair and basking.

"What is there to talk about? They already know about it."

"Yes, but have you talked to them since then?"

I slide back and forth on my seat. "Well … I know I should do it, but I'm not very keen on it. Because the last time this topic came up, there was a huge mess. Remember?"

"They reacted that way because they thought you didn't trust them. That's why you should prove them wrong."

"I don't think they want to hear that."

"Of course you shouldn't tell them any details. Although I'm surprised they didn't ask for it. I thought boys were constantly talking about something like that."

"And what about you girls?" I ask, giving her a knowing look. She looks surprised. "How do you know?"

I grin. "Jo sometimes looks at me so interested that I seriously wonder what you actually tell her."

Now she grins too. "Of course I'm only telling her good things about you. But what I'm telling her remains among us girls."

I nod. There is no point in asking Camille for details. Silence spreads until Camille says, "I should talk about it with my dad."

I look at her in horror. "Why? That doesn't make any sense."

She looks at me thoughtfully and says, "He has been calmer lately. At least I want to try it. If he doesn't want to talk about it, I'll just leave it."

I don't like that at all, but I don't know what to say to it, so I say reluctantly, "Fine."

Camille gets up from her seat, comes over to me and sits down on my lap. Then she hugs me and says, "I know you're worried that he might do something again to separate us. But I will not allow that this time."

I sigh and put my arms around her. Some people give us curious looks as they pass by, but they say nothing what makes me very happy. After several minutes, Camille suddenly asks, "Tonight?"

"Excuse me?" I ask, confused.

"Are we talking to them tonight?"

I nod and then look thoughtfully over at the guys. Let's see how the evening will go.