Langst: Lost Under The Waves

2- They don't need to know

Lance stirred to find he was in the back of the red lion with a blanket wrapped loosely around him.

The gesture would have made the old Lance smile but now it just made his chest ache.

Sighing he let his head rest back on the wall next to him trying to think of a way out of his situation.

He had spilled the beans to Keith and who knows what he would do next. Probably tell the team how he couldn't even save himself, how he wanted to die?

He didn't want their pity.

The lion came to a stop and Lance groaned internally as Keith turned to look at him.

"Ready?" Keith asked worriedly getting a nod in response. "Alright then."

Keith helped Lance up and refused to let go of his arm which was looped over his shoulders, even when Lance said he was fine.

"Lance." Hunk said quickly pulling his friend into a tight hug. "When you went missing we didn't know where you were we were really worried and I panicked and I thought you were dead or going to die but Keith found you I'm so glad."

"Whoa Hunk, breathe." Pidge said shaking her head as she hugged Lance. "Good to see you're okay."

"Thanks." Lance said quietly but he couldn't quite force his smile, not yet, he needed to cry himself to sleep first.

"You look tired." Shiro said squeezing his shoulder. "You should get some rest."

Lance nodded before heading off to his room leaving the paladins in the red lions hanger.

"Alright spill." Pidge said turning to Keith.

"Something is definitely wrong." Keith explained worriedly.

"We said that this morning." Hunk pointed out. "Was he not feeling well?"

"Kind of, but I think it's mental." Keith said with a slight frown. "He thinks he's worthless and useless."

"He what?" Shiro asked his eyes going wide.

"How can he think that?" Allura asked confused. "He's a paladin."

"Yeah but I'm his rival and he was, no joke, crying on my shoulder." Keith explained with a slight snap of anger.

"How long did he cry for?" Pidge asked her voice quieter now.

"Since I pulled him out till I got him to my lion." Keith sighed. "He just kept asking why I hadn't left him down there and let him die."

"This isn't good." Shiro said quietly. "We need to address the situation and fast."

"No offense Shiro, but he won't take a lecture well." Hunk stated shaking his head. "We have to tread carefully, I've only ever seen him like this once before and even then it was hard."

"He's been like this before?" Keith and Pidge questioned getting a nod in response.

"When?" Keith asked after a few minutes of silence.

"About 2 weeks after you dropped out." Hunk explained sadly.

"Oh no." Keith grumbled running a hand through his hair. "We need to fix this."

"What Keith?" Shiro questioned confused.

"He feels like he's my replacement, like he got my position at the garrison only after I left." Keith stated crossing his arms. "I managed to calm him down but the second I started telling him how great he was he started crying again."

"That's what I mean."

"Not very encouraging Hunk." Pidge frowned shaking her head. "How do we change things?"

"For now let me speak to him." Hunk sighed. "He'll tell me but you guys can't let on that you know, it'll break him more."

~~~

Once Lance reached his room he stared at the ceiling emotionlessly.

He wished he could stay numb but the feelings always returned and that's when it became hard.

He quickly pulled his armour off and grabbed his jacket staying in his undersuit.

He ended up falling asleep hugging his jacket still in half of his armour with tears that were leaking from the corners of his eyes.

When Lance woke up his alarm was going off next to him.

He groaned as he sat up to find he has a pulsing headache, probably from the crying and the cut that he hadn't mentioned to anyone.

They don't need to know.

Lance quickly got up, had a shower and got changed into the new clothes that they had brought from the space mall.

He ended up in a grey hoodie with blue jeans and grey high tops.

As he headed to breakfast he felt a little bit better then the day before and it was evident in the way he walked let alone the small smile on his face.

As he entered the dining room he found Shiro and Allura sat in silence clearly deep in thought.

Lance smirked and took his seat clearing his throat making the two look at him.

"Morning guys." He smiled as he lent back in his chair.

"You seem happy." Allura said surprised.

"Yeah, I actually slept well so that's a bonus." Lance shrugged.

"Morning Shiro, Allura, Lance." Hunk said as he yawned entering the room still in his pajamas.

Behind him entered Pidge, her hair sticking up more then usual making Lance chuckle as she sat with a zoned out expression glued to her face.

Keith then walked in looking like death with dark bags under his eyes.

"You alright Keith?" Shiro asked concerned.

"I couldn't sleep." Keith grumbled taking his space next to Lance. "Morning Lance."

"Morning." Lance laughed making the others look at him confused. "You look like death."

"Maybe I am." Keith pouted making Lance chuckle again.

"You're fun." Lance said shaking his head as Hunk appeared with food looking really concerned.