❝ the DAY you chose to LEAVE me
it RAINED constantly OUTSIDE
in TRUTH i SWORE the RAIN to be
the TEARS in CUPID's EYES ❞
[ bill denbrough x oc ] [ it 2019 ]
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in which, april ambrose gets a phone call from a childhood friend urging her to come bac...
APRIL FELT AS IF SHE WERE ABOUT TO DIE. Her hands trembled as she gripped her rented car's steering wheel. The entire car ride she had repeated the conversation with Nolan, got bombarded by memories, and pulled over multiple times to breathe in and out and finally, she hit the welcome sign. Her breath hitches at the sight. In blue lettering, she reads: ' DERRY WELCOMES YOU '. She wanted to turn back.
This did not feel very welcoming. Her eyes trained on the road as she drove through the highway leading to her hometown. She was ten minutes out now. She wanted to forget everything. Forget it all. She wanted to go back to yearning for answers rather than having them. She wanted to rewind to the beginning of yesterday when she was clearing through her bins and give it all up. April wanted nothing more than for that phone call to have never happened, for her memories to disappear. She wanted to go back to when she hadn't hurt Nolan.
It was frightening, how calm he was. She replayed it over in her head. He chose to sleep on the couch last night, telling her that maybe she was caught up in remembering everything, that he'd be patient with her and surely, she couldn't be in love with whoever she was confiding in him about because it had been twenty-seven years since she had last seen him. He told her she must be confused, that she remembers things she never thought she'd remember and that must be why these emotions feel so big. If it were any other circumstance, April would have believed him. She would have trusted his word because he was right. Twenty-seven years since the last she had spoken to Bill and yet, she could still feel how she was caught in the teenage way she adored him. She remembered that now too: How she would have followed him anywhere.
April spent the night sobbing in her bed, in fear of the monster, guilt for Nolan's pain, and sadness for forgetting. She was sobbing for it all. She told herself that maybe this whole thing wouldn't even matter. Maybe, she would never have to talk about these forgotten emotions again because maybe, she would just die out here and never have to acknowledge any of it, never have to explain anything, and never have to do the hurting herself. She almost wished that would happen. In a particularly dark moment, she thought: 'Maybe IT could just finish the job this time'. God knows IT had almost done it with the first.
Yet, here she was, pulling into the town, her eyes trained on the familiar streetlights, the run-down brick buildings, and a new addition: Fresh pavement. April suddenly remembered the first time she rode Richie's bike, in this very area - - a sidestreet leading to Main. It was on cracked pavement and she had fallen off from poor reaction time, unable to move the handlebars fast enough to avoid a huge pothole. She hit the ground, scraping her knees and Richie could only laugh, picking her up and helping her brush off her dress.
