Dance With Me {l.t.} ✔

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Being back in Doncaster without Louis was odd. This was our home. We picked it out together. We moved into it together. This is where we brought our son home. Together. Being here without him now seemed utterly unfair.
"Just love him."
Johannah's words echoed in my head every so often these days. Just those three words. Just love him. Was I doing that?
We had been back in Doncaster for a week now. It took Louis two days after our fight to even reach out to me, to find me, and when he did, he was drunk off his ass.
"Wha' tha fok you mean you're in Donny?" He slurred his words through the phone. The noise in the background was near deafening. 
"Louis, can you step outside if you want to talk about this? It's really too loud wherever you're at right now." I heard him grumbling under his breath, but about a minute later, the background noise was practically silent. "Thank you."
"Yeah. What the fok is goin' on, Milana. You've got me son across tha country, away from his dad!"
"Louis, we talked about this before I left," I reminded him. "You're in a huge partying mindset lately, and it's got to end. It's destroying who you are as a person, and you know as well as I do that you have been letting your friends and these clubs get between you and your time with Asher. My god, Louis. You aren't even working that heavily right now, and you might as well be touring the globe with as much as you've cared for your own child these past few months. 
I'm exhausted from parenting single-handedly when there is no reason for it. I'm tired of having to care for you in the early hours when you stumble through the front door, still drunk off your ass. It's disgusting, and what is it all for?
Huh? Why are you doing all of this Louis? Who is getting a benefit off it? The tabloids that have your drunken face all over their pages? What good is it doing anyone besides putting money in the pockets of the paparazzi?"
"You just don't get it," he huffed out. I had to give him credit: he did seem a bit more remorseful this time around, but the damage had been done. He had chosen to party, and he carried on for two more nights before he worried about where his son and live-in girlfriend had run off to.
"I do get it," I retorted. "I know you lost your mom. I know you had to perform a song that she practically co-wrote in front of a live audience. Louis, I know these things because I was there. I was at the hospital with your family. I was at your mom's ceremony. I was caring for you and our infant son when it was hurting you so bad that you couldn't even stand up. I know what's going on. I get it. I'm hurting, too."
"Oh, piss off." 
And I couldn't even have time to be mad at him for snapping at me because he ended the call. He was done talking to me. That was about five days ago, and I had yet to hear anymore from him. I wasn't trying, either.
I decided to start settling into life here in Doncaster. There were dance studios and events going on around the area, so finding work would be easy. I searched for a couple things to get Asher into, as well, and I was happy to find a few Mommy groups that would start meeting up in the summer.
For now, I was focusing on family. I hadn't really told any of Louis' family about whatever the hell was going on between us, but that didn't mean they couldn't see me and Asher. It wasn't unusual for Louis to be off somewhere for work.
It was just unusual that he wasn't actually working while he was gone this time.
I was hosting Dan and the kids tomorrow night. Fizz was out on a small DJ'ing tour, so it would just be the four youngest. I was still excited. Phoebe and Daisy were just about head over heels about being able to see Asher again. He had grown so much since they had seen him last.
Next Friday night was my birthday party, and I was hoping to get in contact with Louis again before that. I would really like to work through all of this, but above all of that, he deserved to see his child. I mean, Asher sure didn't do anything to deserve losing his Dad. Plus, I could use whatever help or break Louis would (hopefully) bring. Being without his dad was making the little guy down right bratty.

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From: Lou Bear
Message: when can I c him?

To: Lou Bear
Message: any chance you can break from cali to donny in a few days for the weekend?