Don't Blame Yourself (Yoshiki x Ayumi Fanfiction)

Chapter 11: [insert creative title here]

Ayumi Shinozaki's P.O.V

"Mm..." I sigh softly, still half-asleep. There was some sort of heat around me, but I wasn't complaining about it. It was so warm...soft...comfortable. Even the breath on my neck-- wait, what?!

I open my eyes quickly in surprise, to see a room that isn't my own. Where was I? My mind was still foggy from my restful sleep, which to my happiness, was dreamless. The room was white and mostly empty...and I wasn't alone. I was pressed up against another body. Who was it...? Whoever it was had their arms loosely around my hips. If this wasn't who I thought it was...I would freak.

As I turned around as much as I could, the first thing I saw was the familiar blonde hair. I sighed of relief. I guess I had forgotten I was at his house. It was understandable, I suppose, since I did forget my location even when I woke up at home. Stupid memory. It's never here when I first wake up.

I never wanted to get up, but at the sane time I wanted to get out of his hold. Maybe make breakfast or something. I tried moving his arms, but he stirred in his sleep. I didn't want to wake him. So, instead, I wriggled out by going down. After a few moments of trying to escape the blankets, I finally made my way onto the floor.

Yoshiki looked quite content just lying there, possibly even cute. He did get this worried expression on at times, but I assumed that it was just Heavenly Host nightmares. I had them a lot, so it wasn't a big shock to me. I sighed, glad I didn't have any that night. In fact, I feel great right now. Best sleep I've had in a while...God, that sounded selfish

I pull myself up to my feet, and glance around his room. It was almost empty, the only thing on the wall was a calender. I walk over to it, and squint trying to read it. It was...Saturday today...November 8th...Miki was calling for her normal...BIRTHDAY CALL?!

First, who the hell was Miki? Second, today was his birthday?! Had he even told when his birtbday was? Nonetheless, I felt bad for forgetting if he did tell. If he didn't...well, I can't blame myself.  But still... I didn't even ask when it was. I had just completely ignored him.

A frown spread across my face. I was determined to do something for him today. He...he had helped me so many times before, in Heavenly Host and out, and all I've done is cause him physical and mental pain. I really hope he is the only one who knows about my suicide attempts, because people would think I was a complete bitch (Ayumi-chan...you have a hate club that hates you for that exact reason. So...sowwy. Too late. .3.).

I turned towards the door and scurried out of the room, softly closing the door behind me. Yoshiki was still fast asleep. I didn't blame him. After a day like yesterday...I'm surprised I didn't sleep in that late. Wait...what time was it, anyways? My phone was in my bag which was in  the bathroom. Well, I had a change of clothes in there anyways, so might as well.

Turning toward the tiny bathroom, I took a step and realized that there was this...eerie feeling. As if this wasn't real. As if this was all in my demented head, playing a sick trick on me. I guess I did inherit Hinoe's sixth sense, but I just brushed this off. It was probably just the emptiness of this place was.

Entering the room with my bag, I closed the door with my back and grabbed my bag from the floor. Inside was my uniform which I had stripped off and shoved into the dark crevasses of the bag.

I dug into the bag, digging until I clutched familiar fabric. Pulling out what was in my hand was my sports bra and favorite orange sweater. Okay...that was two articles of clothing out. Grunting impatiently, I begin to search through my belongings. Jeans...? Yeah, these had to be my jeans. Now...socks...

After a few moments, I had my outfit laid out in front of me, not a wrinkle to be seen. Smiling, I pulled on my clothes quickly, glancing to the mirror. I had forgotten to take my hairs out of my pigtails. Oh well.

I grabbed my brush, took out the red ties, shoving it with my toothbrush which I kind of left on the counter. As I brushed through the dark tangled strands, I cleaned up my stuff with my free hand. I did this every morning, so it was easy. Hinoe and I shared a bathroom, so I had to clean up my stuff for her. I don't know why she still lived with us, other than to babysit me. I didn't mind. She was nice to have there...most of the time.

I dug my phone out of the bag when I finished brushing my hair. I looked at the time, my eyes slightly widening.

9:43.

It was 9:43 AM. No, wait...9:44.

Okay, I had slept a little longer than I usually did. But maybe I had taken a while to do my bathroom routine. That's probably why.

Yoshiki's apartment was small, but it was easy to navigate around. I was able to find a place to set my bag out of the way of everything else and get into the kitchen in no time. I smiled at my quickness. Heheh...

Okay...breakfast. I hope he doesn't mind...I don't think he will. Besides, it's his birthday. I gotta do something! I opened the refrigerator, looking for something to make breakfast with.

--

"Yoshiki?" I call, knocking on the door. I had just finished making breakfast with what I could find, and all that was left to do was get him out here to eat it. I waited for a few moments, half-expecting him to be asleep. But...the door slowly opened.

No one was in the room. At all. Gone. Poof. Adios. Sayonara. Empty.

I blink a few times, worry and anxiety reaching to the surface with shallow breaths. I would have heard and seen him come out. The window was shut tight. No signs of him ever being in the room. The clothes were gone. The calender was gone. The alarm clock and phone was gone. HE was gone.

"No, no, no!" I cry, worst case scenarios flipping through my mind. I was staring at the window. I finally noticed one last reminder of him. His ID tag was on the window, attatched to something. Had he climbed out, ditching his jacket (which I guessed the ID tag was stuck on)? Maybe he was just being a jerk and playing a prank. Then I opened the window and looked down.

Two stories. Climbing out would mean death. I grabbed the jacket, pulling it close to me. Where...WHERE?

This all seemed surreal. Was I dreaming? I had to have been. But as many times as I pinched myself, I wouldn't wake up. No matter how hard.

The darkness of this situation started to hit at me, turning my shallow breaths into hyperventilating. I curled up into a ball, and started concentrating on breathing to no avail. He was gone. There was no bed frame to hold up the bed. The closet was too tiny. The kitchen had a clear view of this hallway. The apartment was eerily abandoned.

My vision was blacking out with lack of breath. So were my thoughts. It was as if I had drank too much. Tears brimmed my eyes, as I tried to come up with an explanation of this.

But nothing.

DUN DUN DUUUUH!

Sorry if this was crappy.

But over 900 reads o.o

PEOPLE STAHP READING MY CRAPPY BOOKS D: (Translation: Thank you for reading :33333)

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