His daughter (Austin Carlile)

7

Erika

"Are you ready?" No. But did he really want my honest answer. Probably, but I wasn't gonna give it to him.

"Yes." He smiled and led me out to the car so we could drive to the restaurant a few minutes away.

Local, nothing fancy but apparently great food. "So who am I meeting today?" I asked. I knew. But the silence in the car was getting tense for me and the music just wasn't helping.

"Well there's Aaron, he plays bass and sings, Alan plays the guitar and so does Phil and then finally Tino plays some mean drums." I wrung my hands together shaking a bit. Nervous was an understatement at this point. I was probably dying.

"There's no need to be nervous." He soothed as we pulled into the parking lot. He put the car in park and took off his seatbelt. I sat there frozen. I couldn't move even if my body tried. "Erika look at me." I stayed frozen and kept my gaze ahead of me. Which wasn't much, just a couple of bushes.

"Erika Carlile!" I snapped my head towards him. Not because of the way he exclaimed my name. But because of the name. Carlile. I mean yeah it was my last name now. But...it felt...weird. It made my stomach flutter, in a good way. I felt it. I felt happy.

"What's on your mind?" He asked as he moved some hair out of my face. I shrugged. I'm pretty sure he didn't wanna hear the bs coming out of my mouth.

"That shrug was bullshit and you know it. Just tell me everything. Let it all out." I looked at him and sighed. The look on his face just screamed pure concern and I couldn't just leave him thinking the worst.

"I'm scared...I-I I'm terrified. I have all these what ifs running through my head and all of these bad thoughts. I've literally been to hell and have only just started my journey back..." This was as good as time as any. "I have no body. My mom is dead. My grandparents are dead. For gods sake my dad doesn't even want me. Walked out a while ago. I have no friends.." I pulled up my sleeves and his eyes filled with tears

"do you see these! I was sick of feeling nothing I JUST WANTED TO FEEL SOMETHING!! I didn't care if it was pain. I didn't know how to feel happy and all I felt was numb. I felt like no one wanted me. I knew no one wanted me." By this point I was crying profusely in a restaurant parking lot spilling my story to my adoptive father. I'm pretty sure I ruined dinner for tonight. But he stayed quiet while I continued my rant.

"I had no hope left. And the one potential friend that I had a chance of making killed herself! Farrah! Yeah she couldn't take this world either. And while she says it's because her mind was messed up its really because this worlds a shit storm waiting to happen. And do you notice how I'm putting all of this in past tense! It's because I'm ready. To start a new life. To become a new person. And although I can't shed my skin and get rid of my scars, I can certainly try to and experience happy. And after this rant that went off on a huge unnecessary tangent I have to say that I'm ready. I don't want to be Erika tanner anymore! I wanna be Erika Carlile and embrace it. So thank you....dad." I pulled down my sleeves and looked up at him.

His eyes had tears. And more tears kept streaming down his face. I don't think he was expecting to be crying in a restaurant parking lot anyway. I rubbed my bare eyes and hugged him. He held out his pinky and I smiled and wrapped my pinky around his.

"I promise to love you and care for you and shoot boys with a shot gun I have to get and help you through everything. I just wanna end your suffering. I can't end it completely but I wanna end some of it. I'm so glad you told me this. It'll be ok Erika. It'll all work out."

He unwrapped his pinky and we sat there calming down. "We're still sitting in a restaurant parking lot waiting for my friends." He said full of realization and laughed. "Thanks for figuring it out Sherlock. I was stumped." He just pushed my shoulder and smiled. We had both calmed down significantly and were just fooling around while we waited for his friends.

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Pretty soon all of the guys were here and we stepped out of the car. "I think that's a record for you guys! An hour and a half!!" Austin said while clapping slowly. "I fell asleep in my defense!" A man with long black brown hair exclaimed.

"Sorry man I just got done fu-." Austin slapped over the mouth of a ginger haired man. "Not here Alan we have a 13 year old here!" He removed his hand and the man..Alan blushed. "Well we have two excuses what about you guys." They all looked away meaning they didn't have one and whistled awkwardly.

"That's what I thought." He said and crossed his arms. "Are you gonna introduce us to this beauty right here?" A man with a slight beard asked.

"Yes Tino I was getting there. Guys this is my daughter Erika. Erika this is Alan the ginger princess, Phil the long hair one, Aaron the pretty one and Tino the one with great eyelashes." He finished. I held my hand out and they looked at me like I was crazy.

Did I do something wrong already!? Alan pushed my hand away and before I could argue my polite gesture over his rude one he crushed me into a hug. "We don't shake hands here. We hug."

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"Aaaawwwwwwhhhhh is it really time to go!" Alan whined as we walked out of the restaurant. I had two full boxes in my hand filled with my food as we walked out. I didn't eat at all and I could just tell that Austin wasn't happy about it. But he played it off as nothing.

"Oh stop your whining we're literally gonna be seeing you tomorrow in the studio ginger princess." He rolled his eyes and stopped as Alan stopped.

"But I'm gonna miss you so much baby!" He yelled and wrapped his arms around Austin's neck. I was extremely confused by this and I'm pretty sure my face showed it to as Austin played along running his hand up and down his back.

"I'll miss you go honey bear i'll see you tomorrow." I just walked to the car and got in while I waiting for Austin to come. He got in the car sooner then I thought and we started out journey home. "Why didn't you eat tonight?" I knew this conversation was coming. But I didn't answer because I didn't want to have this conversation.

But he took my silence as something else. "Erika...are you anore-.." "NO!! Why do you have to jump to conclusions! I'm not anorexic." He didn't answer my question, but I knew this discussion wasn't over, but instead going to be replaced with an argument or fight as we pulled into the driveway to see a man sitting on our steps.

Austin turned towards me and warned me to stay in the car and then handed me his phone.

"Call the police if something bad happens." And then got out. He walked towards the guy but the guy was looking right passed him and straight at me. He avoided Austin and ran towards me.

"HEY HANDS OFF MY DAUGHTER!!" He yelled. But the man came closer and before I knew it he was at my window. "Is it really you Erika?" He didn't look good at all. I didn't know this person but yet he knew me.

His nicely tailored suit harbored a smell of beer and mixed cologne the bags under his eyes were scarily there. "Do I know you?" I asked as I leant more towards the drivers side to try to avoid him. He looked surprised at first and then sorrowful.

"You don't know me?" He asked. Was I supposed to? I shook my head and he sighed while I looked at Austin who was frozen. Standing straight like a soldier and ready to strike if anything happened. "Erika....I'm your father."