Story of my life

ANOTHER P

I can't say much about this P and Her relationship with him. Why? Because at one moment She decided that we shouldn't stay in touch at all. But to start from the beginning...

We didn't talk or meet much during this time. Just a text message from time to time, maybe a visit at Her home once or twice. I remember that one time we went shopping together, because She wanted to buy P a gift for Valentines Day.

But of course most memorable for me was the situation I mentioned – our 'breakout'.

So one day She wrote to me a message on facebook and asked if I wouldn't help writing or translating something that She needed for Her studies. I agreed and once I saw what it was I just assumed it was for P. I don't know if it was, but as I knew what Her and his major was at the University I didn't need any more information.

So I did what I was told to do, sent it back and, probably unnecessarily told Her to say 'Hi' to P. And this time She snapped. She said that I should stop thinking about Her the way I used to, because it was the end and we were never meant to be together. And I should just accept the situation and remain friends and if not we should stop contacting each other.

Then I wrote something that I probably shouldn't – 'No, this is not the end'. One simple, innocent sentence that changed everything. I didn't see it then but now I hear how it sounds. It sounds like a threat of a psychopath, especially given the circumstances. So now I see that She might have gotten a little scared of me...

Right after that I got a message via facebook, still from Her account, that I need to leave Her alone and not talk to Her ever again. It was supposed to P, but much later She told me it was in fact Her who wrote this. She thought that this way She would scare me away and I would leave Her alone.

And it worked. I just replied 'ok', closed the chat and deleted my facebook account just to not feel the urge to response with anything else.

So this night I went to work (graveyard shift) and the last thing I did this day was texting Her saying that She shouldn't contact me anymore. I don't know why I did it, I knew it was over. It was stupid and unnecessary. But She replied saying that if my feelings towards Her leave me one day, then I could contact Her again.

And at the time being this was the end. It took me about a month to learn how to get to sleep not crying...

I still couldn't let it go. After some time I got new facebook account and of course from time to time I checked Her profile. It only made me feel worse, but
I couldn't help it. One day I checked it and saw that She had a new boyfriend. So goodbye P, welcome S...