Our Broken Pieces

22

"This really isn't necessary Cisco," Caitlin as he dragged her into the car.

"Yes, it is Caitlin," He responded as he started the engine.

"This isn't like last time," Caitlin replied.

"Caitlin, you know Dr. Finkle and I feel like it is important you talk to someone about this if not us. I think it will help, and if not for you or me do it for Mel."

Although, Caitlin never thought she had to pretend to be reliving that period of her life. On one hand, she didn't want her friends to suffer thinking that she was suffering, but on the other hand, she was scared of what would happen if they knew the truth about what happened that night and her past. Caitlin was scared of what they would think of her but especially scared of what Barry might do with Melony if he knew she used to kill.

"Fine," Caitlin sighed.

"Okay, Barry and I will watch Melony at Star Labs today. Then we're all having dinner at Joe's tonight."

......................................

Caitlin the small office and laid down on the couch as Dr. Finkle, her therapist, got her file out.

"Alright, Caitlin Snow," She read off the file. "I haven't seen you since you had couples counseling with Ronnie. How is he doing?"

Caitlin sighed. This was going to be a long session.

.......................................

Barry and Cisco sat across from each other in the Cortex, conversing about all the recent events, Caitlin, new meta-human mission gear, and new movies they were planning to go watch together.

"Uncle Barry, Uncle Cisco, I'm bored," Melony said as she sat up from her play table that Joe had set up for her at Star Labs.

"Mel, we just got back from the park. Why don't you take a nap or play on your tablet?" Barry suggested.

"I'm not tired and I don't want to play on my tablet," she responded.

"Are you hungry?" Cisco asked.

"No," she replied.

"Cisco, why don't we go to the pier. It's warm enough to walk on the beach and I think the carnival is open today," Barry suggested.

"Yay!" Melony exclaimed, "Can I get giant cotton candy!"

"Oh, and they have the best pecan pie stand," Barry joined.

"Of course! just don't tell your mom," Cisco laughed. "Let me just finish some checking some things in my workshop," Cisco said as he got up.

"Alright, let's get ready to leave while Uncle Cisco does that," Barry said grabbing Melony's sweater and helping the six-year-old button it up. "What's this?" Barry asked, holding the silver, snowflake-shaped necklace around her neck.

"It's a necklace mommy gave me," Mel replied. "She says my daddy gave it to her. She also made me promise to never take it off so that daddy is always close to me. It's also pretty, so I like it."

"Yeah, it is pretty," Barry replied, toying with the necklace in his hand. This necklace is from Savitar, he thought.

He knew it shouldn't bother him. He was gone, Savitar literally evaporated into thin air in front of him. Plus, Savitar was technically Mel's daughter and he couldn't change that. But despite that, learning the necklace Mel had around her neck was from one of his greatest enemies did stir him a bit.

"It's so pretty, maybe you should take it off for now. You don't want to get it dirty on the beach or lose it at the carnival," Barry said.

"Oh, okay," Mel replied, as Barry began lifting off the necklace.

..........................

"I see... a lot has happened, huh," Dr. Finkle replied after Caitlin explained her past few years, in vague details and leaving out of superpowers, of course.

"And your daughter, Melony, she's been a great improvement in your life?"

"Yes, definitely. She's the reason I get up every day."

"Good. And her father, you say he died before she was born?"

"Yes," Caitlin replied.

"How was your relationship with him?"

"We fell in love, unexpectedly. But we were both in a very bad place when we did. I was trying to figure out who I was and what I wanted and so was he. We were involved in some very bad things and he ended up dying because of it."

"And how do you feel about that?"

"Sad, I guess. Upset, a little angry."

"Angry. Why is that?"

"I don't know..." Caitlin sighed. "Maybe because we did connect to each other and loved each other and then poof he was gone. Maybe because life just seemed to always take and take and take from me. Or because he died well knowing that he would be leaving behind a daughter and me." Caitlin began to get a little teary.

"Do you feel that it was his fault that he died, and in doing so left you and your daughter behind."

"I guess. He just made it seem like he didn't have a choice to do all those bad things. But in doing so he would leave me, raising our daughter by myself and trying to survive. Doing things that I wish I hadn't done to survive and protect her." Caitlin sniffed, wiping away a tear thinking about what Amunet told her.

"I'm mad at him, things he did, I did, what I became. But I still love him. I still wish every day that he could be with me and help raise Mel. I don't know why."

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