Protect Me Not

Chapter 3

Mary adjusted her head and put her armrest in an upward position for a more comfortable placement in her seat on the aircraft. Thinking back to the Richard days, as Mary often referred that part of her life as; made her fidget and become uncomfortable in her own skin. Richard's affair with Anna had been culminating for nearly half a year. That much he told her. Richard loved Mary but the temptation of beautiful women and a growing desire for wild sex seemed to overrule his logical thinking and commitment to one woman. His sexual fantasies were becoming too hard to feed and he so much as told Mary that he respected her too much to ask her to fulfill his inner desires and passion for his unusual and aggressive sex demands. Mary would not agree to anal penetration or being mildly strangled while he called her names like bitch, slut and whore. Richard had turned into a monster, an aggressor of sorts. He started to live this secret life that Mary could not and would not be part of. She started to dislike herself for allowing Richard to please himself on a regular basis with whatever means he felt fit. Sometimes Mary would agree to disturbing acts in hopes that he would quit fooling around with other women. Most of the time, Richard would climax quickly and they would carry on with their everyday activities like two civilized citizens. When Richard was not in a sexual rage, he was the most adoring and attentive partner to her. He often brought her gifts of jewelry and perfumes from the top designers. He would promise her more time together and spoiled her with trips to exotic islands. She often thought of calling off their relationship but could never bring herself to do it. Mary felt trapped. She became recluse and concentrated on her work more and more. Oddly enough, the more she allowed herself to be victimized, the more successful she became in her career. Although Richard was abusive to her in the privacy of their home, he treated her like a queen in the general public. He adored her honour and commitment to his needs and valued her gorgeous body. They would often go to the gym together and he would whisper that he was going to give it to her hard in the sauna afterwards. Mary would flash him a smile but she knew she was slowly losing herself internally. Every vile action he forced upon her, Mary felt a piece of her inner strength and structure chip away. Piece by piece, her hollowing soul made room for her body to crumble. Mary hated when he used vulgar words toward her. She knew the scenario all too well. After a torturous work out on her arms and abs, she would have to pretend she was enjoying Richard's cowardly attempts at love making. First he would slam her into the wall face first all while telling her to bend over so he could jam himself hard into her. Mary would scream out in pain which only aroused Richard more. He would then grab her hair and yank her head back while he vigorously forced his erect penis down her throat. He would say things like "suck it hard baby" and "get ready whore because my cock is ready to fuck you something good." As Richard's body quivered rampantly over her, Mary remained still and most importantly quiet. She knew by his uncontrollable shaking he was almost ready to finish his demon attack and the end of his vicious pleasure was nearing. Richard's finale was always the same. He would groan in pleasure and then tell Mary that he loved her. She was always happy to hear that she was loved and equally pleased to know he was fulfilled. Mary was petrified to find out what would happen if she could no longer keep him satisfied.

Mary was always ashamed and held her guilt and lack of innocence to herself. This was not the love making scenarios she envisioned enduring for the rest of her life, nor did she want it to become a familiar part of their everyday life. Love making was never that way in the romance novels she read growing up. Mary didn't have close friends or even family to talk to about her troubling relationship. She was raised by her widow aunt when her parents passed. Mary never knew the real reason of their deaths but the coroner confirmed death by natural gas inhalation. There was speculation as to how and why there was a gas leak in the house but some gossip columns rumoured it to be murder suicide. Mary always felt she was a burden to her aunt so she did what she thought was best and left her Aunt's house at the very tender and impressionable age of fourteen. Mary practically raised herself always cautious not to let anyone get too close to her. She never wanted to relive loosing someone she loved again. Her co-workers were the closest thing she had to friendships and clearly rough sex wasn't something you could casually bring up as dinner conversation with a colleague. Besides, she was Mary Templemead, a little naïve girl from Toronto who continued to work tirelessly in order to build her career, her empire. Mary Templemead, the same naïve girl who wanted to prove her rise to stardom in New York City.