Protect Me Not

Chapter 1

Mary always had a fear of flying so when she heard the engine on the plane stutter she immediately gripped the hand of her beloved husband Victor. Mary was travelling to Chicago for the third time that month. Her work schedule had her travelling to different cities throughout the year. Mary is the owner of a lucrative and well established brokerage firm with a vast clientele and a growing demand for her real estate services. She built the firm from the ground up, a task she was proud of but never bragged about. It could have been that Mary was very pleasing to the eye of most men but rumour had it she owned the best Brokerage firm around town. It was never her shining beauty that allowed her success to flourish, although it helped. Ultimately her business was a success because she was good at what she did.

Mary became very well known in New York. With her face plastered all over billboards, transit and buildings throughout the inner city, it was hard not to notice her. Mary's attempts at expanding her offices in Chicago proved to be harder than anticipated. The clients that have had the pleasure to meet with her in person witnessed her beauty, intelligence and charm firsthand. She didn't dance around any deals but rather cut to the chase and got the job done. Most men were naturally attracted to her looks first, with her business skills coming secondary but Mary always kept her business professional. Her luscious and voluminous black hair accented by her equally beautiful blue eyes was known to draw in her male clientele where as her talent and knowledge of her industry equally attracted female clients. Mary's long and lean legs were always a show stopper with the men especially when she wore her tailored skirt suits but it was her personality, intelligence and professional behaviour that her woman counterparts enjoy the most.

"Hey, not too tight," Victor jokingly said as Mary squeezed his hand tight. Victor was the only one who truly knew Mary inside and out. Next year, they were celebrating their tenth wedding anniversary. Victor already had the celebration planned and set in motion. Mary loved Victor's innate ability to keep everything organized and strategically planned without the slightest onset of stress. She joked about his low stress level being the only reason she married him. Victor knew better. He was the epitome of good looking and charming. Victor easily had a choice of women at any given time of the day. Standing at six feet tall, olive complexion and gleaming white teeth, Victor was pretty confident with himself. Women loved his full head of dark wavy hair and his fat wallet. He was overly generous with his money and most women socializing in his group knew that. When it came time to settle down and start a family, choosing a wife was a no-brainer for him. A woman like Mary was always on his radar so when he first met her, he knew just how to captivate her heart.

"I hate flying," Mary muttered.

"I wasn't aware of that," Victor lied. Clearly Victor thought it was best to use humour to keep the aircraft turbulence off the mind of his beloved. It wasn't unusual for Mary's mood to go from good to bad in a flash, especially if she felt threatened. Keeping with the teasing moment Victor decided to joke about the flight attendant checking him out.

"Oh please, get a grip," Mary said. "She's not checking you out, she's merely doing her job and making sure this plane isn't crashing." She leaned her head back on the plush leather backrest. Mary closed her eyes and pretended the turbulence was of no bother to her. She allowed her thoughts to take her to a darker time in her life. Although her past memories were not kind or meaningful, she tried to convince herself that the constant remembrance would help her emotionally heal. A time long ago before she even knew Victor, Mary's life was something you would only witness in a movie, or rather a horror story. Long before Mary learned the art of being strong willed and how to keep a stone faced facade, she was a delicate flower easily influenced in search for a promise of a happily ever after. She could feel her heart crushing all over again every time she allowed herself to think about him. She thought for sure he was her happily ever after.

Mary let go of Victor's hand abruptly and told him she was tired and wanted to rest. Victor obliged knowing all too well that Mary was allowing herself to be violated by her own inner demons and there was nothing he could do about it. Although they talked about it on a few select occasions, Mary never sought professional help after her breakup with Richard.

It still seemed inconceivable to Mary. How could she have been so blind? How could she have not known? How could she fool herself into thinking they were meant to be together, perfect for one another. How could it be that Mary hadn't noticed Richard had slipped away from her? How very manipulating and abusive he had become. How did it all change so suddenly? Why did she allow herself to be manipulated in such a horrible way? Was it already moving in that direction but she just chose not to notice? Everything seemed to be as it should be...until...until it wasn't...until Anna. The not knowing part made Mary feel like such an idiot, so naive. She'd been so vulnerable flying to New York and Chicago making real estate deals while Richard was making partners in his law firm. Perhaps they were both too busy to keep their relationship solid. Everyone who knew them thought they had a concrete relationship. It was a perfect blend of love, admiration and respect for one another and everyone witnessed it whenever they were together. When they were alone, that's when Mary had to become the person she desperately didn't want to be. She had to climb deep within herself, close the world out and put on her best performance as if her life depended on it, and sometimes it did.

Mary could hear the flight attended asking Victor if he wished to have another drink but Mary chose to ignore both the attendant and Victor's response. All she wanted to do is think back to the days she spent with Richard and try to make sense of it all. Part of her thought that if she figured out all the ways the relationship went wrong, she could ensure never to repeat those mistakes again. If only Anna hadn't come along and destroyed everything that seemed normal in her life then maybe things would have be different. Mary often placed the blame of their soured relationship on herself. If she wasn't so self consumed in building her career and business then maybe she would have seen all the warning signs. Maybe if Mary blamed herself she could try to make sense of it all, possibly figuring out why men seemed to turn to an Anna of sorts.