Never Thought

Chapter 34

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I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles. Best Tomorrow Believe -Audrey Hepburn
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A few minutes later Aiden barged into my room looking angry. "What's your problem?" He shouted as he held me by my shoulders pushing me into a nearby wall. I was fuming as I took his hands off my shoulders roughly. "I don't have a problem! I just don't like to see her face." I hissed up at him, and he scoffed at my response. "You don't like to see her face, or her face with mine?" And I broke my eye contact with him. I Tried to walk away as he put one hand on my right side and I turned towards my left, and he placed his other hand on the left side.  Sandwiching me between himself and the wall. "Let me go" I looked up at him as he glared at me. "Admit it" he said quietly and I just shook my head. "Let me go," I said again more weakly this time. I didn't want to play this game again. "Just admit it Bella, you're just as much in love with me" he shouted at the end. And I suddenly wanted to get away from him. "I don't" I spoke with as much confidence as I could. And he looked me in the eye. "Tell me you don't feel anything, look into my eyes and tell me your heart doesn't beat faster when I am near you" he muttered bringing me closer to him taking my hand in his and putting it on his chest."tell me, your heart isn't beating as fast as mine at the moment. Tell me you don't feel a jolt of electricity when I touch you" he carried on, gliding his hand up my arm, to my face caressing it. "Tell me, you didn't even feel slightly jealous when I hugged Melissa. When I spent the entire day with her." "Tell me you don't get lost into my eyes when I look at you" he was staring into my eyes, daring me to look away. "Tell me you don't love me! Look into my eyes and say that you feel absolutely nothing. say that there is nothing between us." He finished, and I mustered up my energy to snap my head away from him. Looking the other way, closing my eyes shut. "Look at me Bella" he spoke softly wiping the tears that had managed to escape. "You cant hide from the truth just by closing your eyes." He mumbled softly, bring his hands to my chin turning my head back towards him. "Open your eyes and atleast let them speak, let them tell me how much you love me" he wiped another tear from the back of his hand, and I slowly opened my eyes staring into his deep blue intense ones. The love that they held, the intense gaze that he gave me. Anger suddenly bubbled inside of me, probably because of how well he knew me, from the fact that no one has ever understood me as well as he has or maybe because of how well I could see his love for me and it scared the shit out of me. Whatever it was, It made me snap, I couldn't take it anymore and I gave him what he wanted, what he wanted to hear, as much as I wanted to deny it. It was the truth. "YES I FREAKING LOVE YOU, IS THAT WHAT YOU WANTED TO HEAR" I suddenly shouted catching him off guard and pushing him away. "YES I CAN'T SEE YOU WITH MELISSA, YES I GET LOST IN YOUR EYES. YES EVERY TIME YOU LOOK AT ME MY HEART SKIPS A BEAT AND YES I FEEL FIREWORKS EXPLODE WHEN YOUR HAND EVEN BRUSHES AGAINST MINE. AND YES I CAN'T BEAR TO SEE YOU WITH ANYONE ELSE! ARE YOU HAPPY?" Tears rolled down my cheek, but he didn't interrupt me. His glimmered with happiness and suddenly I felt tired. All energy draining from me as my tone got lighter and weaker. "But why don't you understand? You can't love me. I am a curse. This whatever we have" I signalled between him and I. "Finishes the moment we say the word love to each other. This word takes everyone away from me. And now you're next. I don't want to lose you. I don't want you to go too." I begged him, and he came closer to me hugging me to his chest "I'm not going anywhere, I'm here with you. I will never leave you" he hushed me calming me down. It took him a good while too, before I got out of his arms and sat in front of him holding his hands in mine. He was about to talk and I shushed him with my finger. Before taking a deep breath, knowing very well that this was it, everything was going to change after this. After all these years, I couldn't believe I was about to do this now "3 years ago, my mom died because of me. I was at a party and asked her to come pick me up. When she did a drunk driver ran the red light causing our car to flip. I somehow managed to get out and got my mum out too. But a lot. of her blood had been lost, and she asked me to go get help. I called 911 but they were too late. I shouted and screamed for people but no one was there to help. Her last words to me were I love you. And once she passed away. The night after her funeral, before my dad turned into an abusive monster he had sat me down hugged me and said he loved me. The next morning, I was greeted with my first punch." I said, taking a deep breath in. Aiden clenched his hands in anger and I rubbed his knuckles with my thumb. He didn't interrupt me. He let me say everything I want. He did however, come closer to me. And wrapped his arms around my waist. "My brother before he left. That night he came in my room and told me how strong I was and that he loved me, the next morning there was no sign of him, other than a note saying he will miss me." I said, wiping away my tears in the most unlady like way possible "Every time someone has said I love you to me. They leave me. I don't want that from you. I don't want you to leave me. I don't want to lose you. Which is why I cut myself today, I thought you left me too." I muttered holding onto him stronger than before as if he'll disappear. "I'm not going anywhere Bella. I'm staying right here. Even if you tell me to leave I won't" he assured me, and I just nodded hugging him tight. "I want to kiss you" Aiden mumbled, and I looked up at him through my lashes, shyly. He rubbed his thumb over my lips licking his own. "You can-" And he didn't let me speak anymore. His lips were pressed against mine. The kiss was soft yet urgent. He was kissing me so softly like I'd break if he went any harder. His hands went behind my neck and mine went into his hair tugging it. A moan escaped my lips as he asked for entrance. And I let him dominate. He pulled me into his lap and carried on caressing my neck with his thumb. He pulled away pressing his forehead against mine both of us panting heavily. "Oh my" I said as he chuckled at my response. He moved his face down kissing my jaw, and then down to my neck. "You have to stop" I told him but it soon turned into moan when he found my sweet spot, biting it and then sucking on it. "Mine" he growled as he moved his face up pecking me on my lips. And I just smiled in return. "Yours" I whispered up to him kissing his nose.
"What about Melissa?" I questioned him suddenly remembering her, he pecked my lips once more. "The truth?" He asked, and I nodded, biting my lip anxiously waiting for his reply, "Melissa and I were never together, I did that just to make you jealous" "I was never jealous of her" I said rather confidently surprising myself. He scoffed at my answer "please! You just slapped her for hugging me. And when I told you that I was with her all day, you were boiling with anger" he laughed slightly, and I hit his shoulder in response. "Where were you then?" I asked him, and he raised his eyebrow followed by a secretive smirk. "You admitted you loved me within 24hours!" And I gasped at him. "You're did all this just, so I would accept? What a terrible person" And he just laughed as he hugged me by my waist. Bringing me closer to him. "I'm really sorry though, I didn't think it would get out of hand and you would end up doing this" he grabbed my wrist which was now neatly bandaged, running his thumb over it. "It's not your fault, I shouldn't have been so stupid" I assured him and then I gasped covering my mouth with my hands "wait a minute! did the bad boy just apologise to me?" I teased him, trying to lighten the mood. Thankfully it worked since he pecked my nose before standing up, pulling me up with him. "Seems like the bad boy is not so bad anymore." He smirked. "Lets get dinner ready, you're starving" he said, and I shook my head "I'm not!" I said confused. "I know you didn't eat all day because I wasn't there to keep you in check" blushing I just looked down at his comment. He knew me so well. "Who knew the scary bad boy would be so caring" I teased him again, and he did a fake scoff "never!" He replied followed by a smile. A full smile. That made him look even more handsome than he already is. "You're so hot" I mumbled up at him and immediately regretting that even came out of my mouth. I said my thoughts out aloud. "I meant you're warm! Are you ok?" I made a futile attempt of covering up my stupidness. And he just full on laughed at my statement. Throwing his head back for a cute hearty laugh. "It's ok! Your hotter than me" he winked at me, kissing the top of my head. My cheeks instantly went red and I turned my face away in embarrassment. "Lets just go" I mumbled walking out of the room with him chuckling behind me.