sʜᴀᴛᴛᴇʀɪɴɢ [Kingdom of Loathing fanfiction]

Chapter 5

Quite a prententious quest for someone like you.

***

"All my precious art supplies ! All gone ! Who knows for how long...? Oh, my poor babies ! What would happen if we don't find them out !"

The pretentious artist then went on one knee, dramatically bending down on the floor... over-exagetatively dramatic, may I say, this one.

"And... that's it ? All this because your art stuff is gone ?"

"Art... stuff ? My precious supplies, just stuff ?!" he abruptly stood up, placing a finger on my chest in a threatening fashion. "I don't think you got it. I, Penny T. Brœsh, am the greatest artist the Kingdom of Loathing has ever known, but lately I've been unable to grace its population with my works of staggering genius, because all of my painting supplies have been lost or stolen."

"Aww, poor you." I rolled my eyes in the sky, smiling ironically.

"I'm being serious here. Will you help me retrieve them ? I beg you... just for this." Penny looked up to me with pleading eyes. I rolled mine again before saying :

"Sure, sure. I'm always glad to support the arts."

"Great !" he jumped on me and started wraping his arms around me.

"Oi, no time for cuddles now ! Spare me that and go on." we then let go of each other.

"Uh. If I'm going to work, I'll need my paintbrush, my palette, and my paint", he started to explain. "The last time I remember seeing the palette, I was near the Haunted Pantry on the Right Side of the Tracks. My pail of paint -- I probably lost it while I was slumming in the Sleazy Back Alley looking for inspiration. And my brush was stolen by this punk Knob Goblin kid who's always trying to bite my style."

"Mhm... okay. I'll see what I can do."

I then set off to the nearest place first : the Sleazy Back Alley.

***

I went foward, without being aware of what dangers might await here. On the way, nothing too alarming at first. Until I feel a hand lying on my shoulder, that is.

"Heyy, sweetheart. You got some sugar~?"

I turned around, and to my utter disgust, I recognized the face of a hobo. Hold on here, I don't have anything against hobos, it's just that this one... was utterly awful. His dirty hand was grabbing on my shoulder. And I bet it was going to go a bit more to the front. I quickly turned around and swang my club to his chest. He fell to the floor.

"Sorry, perv, but I don't have any time for this !" I hissed to him. "Also, I'm gonna take this."

I approached his knocked out body and grabbed onto the bottle of wine he was grabbing. I examined it closer.

"Might not use it about now... but who knows ?"

I put it in my bag and went ahead.

The exploration went pretty good, asides the one or two spiders that I had to fight on the way. At a dead end, I faced a brick wall, and downwards was placed a single pail labeled "red". Might be the one Pen's looking for, I thought to myself. I approached it. But as I was about to pick it up, a shadowy figure dashed to it and stole it in the blink of an eye. I turned around to it, to recognize the silhouette of a man with long hair tied together. I adjusted my sight. The said man was wearing funky colored clothing, had sunglasses on his face and headphones on his ears. His blue eyes, through the glasses, stared at me, and winked to my direction.