Bloodlust

chapter six

-6-

The next morning Alex wakes me up. “Morning,” he says as he hands me a mug of coffee.

“Thanks,” I say as I get up and head to the bathroom to shower and get dressed. When I step in the shower I let the hot water relax me. I just want to stay protected under the spray of the shower all day, I never to leave the warmth and calm. I wish I could just get away from the world, but that’s impossible. I sigh as I turn off the shower, dry off and put on a pair of black jeans and a red shirt, slipping a black sweatshirt over it. I grab my coffee which has cooled down and I head to the kitchen. I put the coffee in the microwave and Alex hands me a plate of bacon and eggs. Becky is at the table eating and she stares at me.

“Sleep well?” he asks me as I sit down at the table.

“Yeah,” I say. “You?”

“Really well.”

“What about you Becks?” I ask her.

“I dreamed I had a unicorn and her name was Sparkles and she chewed bubblegum.” Becky says. “And we went to the beach together and we made sandcastles and we swam in the ocean and it was fun!” She smiles at me.

“Sounds really fun.” I say, “What color was Sparkles’ horn?”

“It was a rainbow,” Becky says wistfully. “And her mane was a purple rainbow too.”

“I wish I dreamed about unicorns,” I tell Becky and Alex snickers.

Becky smiles and puts her little hand on mine. “You can if you try,” she tells me.

“Okay,” Alex says, “we have to get you to the day care center.”

“Yay!” Becky says. She hops down from her chair and grabs her backpack.

“Christopher’s parents called me this morning,” Alex says, “He went over to someone’s house and never came back. They were really worried about him.”

“Weird,” I say quietly. I know what we’re both thinking. A murderer is loose and Christopher is missing. It doesn’t take long to put two and two together.

“Yeah,” Alex says quietly. “Are you good to head to school on your own?” Alex has to drive Becky to day care but walk to school. His parents don’t want someone at the school to hit his car and they think it’s a waste of gas. It’s a stupid argument but Alex does what his parents want.

“Yeah,” I say as I finish my breakfast.

“Cool. Well, I’ll see you at school then,” he says as he picks up Becky and takes her out to his car. I still have time before I have to head to school. Alex somehow goes back and forth from driving to walking. He doesn’t tell anyone and no one asks him.

I feel bad for staying here. Alex has to take care of Becky and manage his own life. He needs good grades so he can get into college and go somewhere.

I get up and I grab my stuff so I can head to school. The October air is getting colder every day, thank God, because I’m still stuck wearing a sweatshirt everyday because of my arm. I’m probably stuck wearing long sleeves for a while.

I wonder if I’m ever going to get married, or go to college, or have kids. I can’t see myself finding someone I truly love and getting married, let alone having kids. I can’t even see myself going to college. As hard as I try to imagine myself in a dorm and attending classes, I just can’t see it. It’s not me. I wonder what I’ll do. I can’t see myself as an adult. Will I make something of myself or will I just off myself when I realize I’m a lost cause? I shake away the depressing thoughts as I get to school.