Bloodlust

chapter fifteen

Part Two

-15-

  I wake up in James’ apartment and my body snaps to attention. I feel more alert and aware of my surroundings. I open my eyes and the room looks different. It may be dark but it doesn’t matter, because I can see perfectly. I can see everything with a lot more detail. I can hear everything too. I hear the humming of the kitchen appliances and the sounds of cars outside. I sit up and I feel different. My movements feel more accurate and effortless. I take a breath out of habit and I can smell everything. The remnants of food and a scent that I know is James. I smell something else. Something good, but it’s faint and I know I can’t get it. Blood, and I want it.

  I look in the hallway mirror and I see my reflection. I guess that’s a vampire myth that’s now busted. My skin is pale and my black hair just makes my skin look paler. I flex my arm and I have more muscle. I don’t look perfect but I look pretty damn close.

  Unfortunately, I’m a monster now. A bloodthirsty monster that needs to be killed. I’m a killer. I need to feed on blood and kill humans to survive. I know I’m going to end up killing people. I’m no longer human. My humanity died when I did.

The thought of blood makes me want to kill. I need to listen as a heartbeat slows to a stop under my strength. I need the kill. I need to be the killer that I really am, no matter how ashamed I am of it.

  I hate myself! I hate myself for wanting to kill and take the life from an innocent person. I hate myself for needing blood. I hate myself for not being a human anymore. I hate myself because I’m a monster. I hate James even more for making me a monster.

  I hear a rattling by the door and I shoot up. I stand up so fast I startle myself. I go over to the door, my body tense and ready to fight whatever it is outside. The door opens and James comes in holding a coffee cup. I smell what’s in the cup and I immediately move closer to James to get to it and get to the scent wafting from it. I need the blood that’s in that cup. I feel my canines elongate and become fangs. It’s a little painful, but if I get blood from it, it’s worth it.

“You’re up,” James says as he smiles at me. “Want something to drink?” He holds the cup under my nose. It takes everything inside me to not snatch the cup out of James’ hand. He hands me the cup, and as much as I don’t want to drink it, an instinct deep inside me takes over and I start gulping down the blood. The cup is empty too soon and I remove the top, licking all the blood I can out of the cup and off the top. I know the blood is from a human, and I feel horrible about drinking it, but part of me just doesn’t care. There was something wrong with the blood that I just drank though. It wasn’t fresh enough. I want more. I want fresher blood, and being trapped in James’ apartment is keeping me from getting it.

I rush towards the door and slam into it as hard as I can. The door doesn’t budge. I grab at the knob with all my strength and I’m surprised when that doesn’t even move. James grabs at me and tries to yank me back. I fight against him and I notice him grimacing as he struggles to keep a grip on me. I make sure I writhe and twitch in his grip to try and get him to let go, but he still maintains his hold. I kick at the door and James lifts me up. I keep kicking at the door. James must have it barricaded somehow. “Let me out!” I yell as I continue to fight him.

“Calm down!” James shouts.

“Let me out!” I shout back at him as he attempts to pin me and fails. I stand up and run at the door again, ramming it with my shoulder, making the walls shake. The door doesn’t even buckle.

“Get a hold of yourself,” James yells at me as he grabs my waist and slams me into the ground. I roll on top of him and bare my fangs at him. He bares his fangs back at me as he shoves me off of him. “Do you want to kill your family and friends?” he shouts. I stop fighting him and he glares at me. He goes to the kitchen and throws a blood packet at me. The packet is cold and as tempting as the blood is, it kind of disgusts me.

“Well?” James asks. “You wanted blood, aren’t you going to drink it?”

“It…it doesn’t seem right,” I say as I sit down on the couch. Staring at the blood is so tempting and I finally give into my instincts and poke a hole in the packet. I instantly feel calmer. I start sucking the cold blood out of the packet and my instincts are screaming that it isn’t right. I finish the packet and toss it on the table. “It felt wrong,” I tell James. I can tell he’s slightly relieved that I’m no longer desperately trying to escape the house.

“Of course it feels wrong,” James explains. “It’s not fresh!”

“I want something fresh,” I say.

“You need to wait.”

“But you drink from humans,” I fire back.

“I’ve also been a vampire for a long time,” James says like he’s explaining it to a three year old. “You’re a new vampire,” he tells me.

“But it feels wrong.”

“I know,” James says. “I know that it feels wrong but I can’t have you going on a hungry rampage through town.”

He hands me another packet and sits down on the couch next to me. I finish the packet and toss the plastic on the table.

“I have a trash can, you know.” He looks disdainfully at the packets.

“Fine.” I get up and grab the empty packets off the table. I go to the kitchen and toss them in the trash. I go back to the couch as far away from James as I can.