Bloodlust

chapter eight

-8-

I don’t want to be around anyone right now. I just want to be alone. I head to the park. I don’t give a fuck about the dangers of going there alone right now. I don’t care about anything. I just want to be alone and able to think for a while. I head towards the playground and toss my suit under the dome and lay on the slide. I stare at the sky. Part of me wishes that I could be religious so I could say Christopher is in heaven.  He’s gone though. As much as I hate it, Christopher is dead. He’s gone, and he’s never coming back.  

“Hello there,” James says as leans over the side of the slide and he peeks over my head. I jump and smack my forehead on his. He moves back, but only an inch. He’s clad in his usual fashion of all black, making him blend in with the night.

“Ow, fuck,” I say. “What the hell are you doing here?” I rub my forehead. James looks unharmed and he continues to stare at me with a curious expression.

“I was going to ask you the same question,” James says. “But to answer you, I was just wandering around the park. I’m a wanderer,” he shrugs mysteriously. “What are you doing here?” he asks me as he pokes my shoulder. “You always come to this playground. Why?”

“Yes, I know I always come here,” I say growing more irritated as James keeps speaking. I just wanted to be alone. I just wanted to spend some time by myself to try and forget everything.

“Why?” James asks me.

“I don’t know why,” I tell him irritably as I close my eyes and put my arm over my face.

“You have to know why you came here,” James says.

“I don’t fucking know, okay?” I yell as I sit up and glare at him. “Can’t I just go somewhere and be alone to think?”

“So you come here to think,” James says, “That’s interesting,”

“Listen,” I say as I give him a look that I hope tells him to back off, “I’ve got enough going on, and I don’t need something else fucking things up even more.”

James comes around and leans over me, his knee between my legs and his elbows on either side of my head. I feel an urge to just lean up towards him and pull him on top of me, pressing our mouths together in the process. I want us to be closer. I push the feeling aside, freaked out by the thoughts invading my head. I’m not supposed to be in the mood for that right now. My friend just died, my mom left, and I came to the park to think, not have James bother me.

“So we’re something, huh?” James asks, his eyes glittering and his dark eyes taunting and amused as he leans down and presses his lips to mine. My breath hitches and I press into him for a brief second. As much as I crave his touch I come to my senses and push him away.

“No,” I say as I stand up and shake my head. I’m saying ‘no” both to myself and to James. “No, we are not something.” I look at him and his blank expression. It irritates me even more that he’s not showing any emotion. “I barely even know you,” I say, thankful I could come up with a valid reason. I have a feeling that “this is wrong” wouldn’t make him stop. I’m pretty sure he knows that this is wrong.

James shrugs. “Honestly there’s not much to know about me,” he says.

“I’m sure that’s true,” I reply sarcastically.

“It is,” James says. I wish he could just act normal for once, but I’m fairly certain he’s a raving lunatic and acting normal isn’t going to happen.

“Good for you,” I reply and I go and grab my things from under the dome. I turn to leave and James follows me. It must be impossible for him to leave me alone.

“Did you run away from home?” he wonders aloud as he walks next to me and points to the clothing I’m carrying

“Yes,” I reply hesitantly. He nods. He isn’t getting the message that I just want to be left alone.

“Why did you run away?” he inquires, pushing my patience.

“I’m not telling you that.”  

“Why not?”

“Because it’s personal,” I tell James. Why doesn’t he just leave me alone? Can I not make it more obvious that I don’t want him following me?

“Then it has to be something dramatic!” James muses, “Maybe your mom found your dad in bed with another man!” His eyes glint with possibilities.

“Stop! Can you just shut up and leave me alone?” I say, my voice low and close to going over the edge again by yelling at James. I pause and close my eyes, rubbing my face with my hands. I take a deep breath and let it out. I do have a reason to be pissed. I’m going through a lot right now and James seems to enjoy fucking with me.

“No,” James says when I’m done. I groan and his smile returns. “Where are you going to sleep?” he asks me.

“I don’t know,” I say honestly, mentally kicking myself for telling him that I’m basically homeless tonight.

“You can stay with me,” James suggests. I have the strangest feeling he planned this.

“And tell me why I would stay with the random stranger who seeks me out to make out with me?”

“Because he’s offering you a place to stay when you don’t have anywhere else to go,” James says.

“No,” I say, “I am not staying with you,”

“I insist,” James says, his dark eyes glinting.

“No!” I reply more fervently and James grabs me, pressing his mouth to mine, catching me by surprise. He keeps a firm grip on me and I’m assaulted by waves of pleasure as he forces his tongue into my mouth. I’m unable to fight back, frozen to the spot. James pulls away and moves to his favorite place, my neck. The pleasure is so intense I feel like I’m electrically charged and about to explode; nothing will be left of me but pure electricity, sparking in the air like burning embers. He nibbles, sucks and licks at the skin both of us moaning and making small noises of pleasure. I want to push James away and tell him to stop, but I can’t. My breath is coming in sharp gasps. This is so wrong. I shouldn’t be enjoying this, especially with all that’s going on. The waves of pleasure are almost painful; they wipe away my thoughts and my vision swims. I feel like I’m going to pass out. I try to say something but I can only produce unintelligible murmurs. I find it harder and harder to hold myself upright, I feel so heavy. I keep trying to protest before James slaps a hand over my mouth.

  I can’t take much more of this. I just can’t. My vision swims again and I feel my body go numb. My knees give out and I pass out before I hit the ground.