grand | jjk+jhs

thirteen

june 12th 2019

"when you leave me, just remember you won't come back. when you leave behind your family, friends, responsibilities, dreams, goals. keep in mind that you won't come back. and if you do come back, it'll be to have your head chopped off on television." yoongi's voice cracked with anguish.

he knows. everything.

the realization that yoongi knows really did hit hoseok like a fucking truck. he's at a loss of words as he lets the news sink in. yoongi knows about jungkook, yoongi knows about jungkook, yoongi knows about jungkook. no one is supposed to know about jungkook. out of all people, yoongi knows about jungkook.

"yoongi.. i'm.. i'm so sorry," tears pool around the man's eyes and run down his face quickly. he begins to shake and tremble with guilt and fear. "i do-don't want to leave you, hyung. i wish things weren't the way they are.. please understand me,"

yoongi held his breath for a few seconds. the realization that his friend can possibly bring back the epidemic because of a love that he has had no idea about?

a moment of silence passes by. which soon turns into minutes, and feels like hours. silence accompanied with guilt, heartbreak, and sorrow. hoseok tried to open his mouth and let out a voice begging yoongi to understand. instead, he fell to his knees and began to sob.

yoongi sat in his own thoughts as he watched his best friend sob. finding out he was talking to a easterner was hurtful, yes, but his best friend who he's been with since day one crying like this hurts way more.

"hoseok.. do you remember when i told you that you could talk to me about anything?" he breaks the silence for the first time in what felt like forever. his voice was hoarse and dry.

hoseok continued crying but nodded just enough to let yoongi know that he does remember.

"listen, i don't have a crush on you. you're my best friend, nothing more than that. but i do love you and i want the best for you only. but what is best for you is not my decision to make. i admit, i really do hate easterners. but i love you more than i hate easterners. i only want to see you happy," yoongi breaks as he continues with his confessions. tears ran down his own cheeks uncontrollably.

"you found your first love!" he chuckles and brings his hand up to wipe away the tears on his face. "i don't have too much experience with love. but the love i've experienced before is addicting, i must say.

slowly, hoseok's crying declined. tears wiped away from his face and only uneven breathing can be heard from the boy as he sat with his legs crossed and ears out for yoongi. for being so shocked at the unexpected tone of yoongi, hoseok was at peace with his best friend's thoughts.

"i don't believe i have a right to come between you and your first chance at genuine love. it doesn't care about the east or west. it cares about the mind and soul." a calming voice, and even more calming words put hoseok to ease immediately.

for the first time, he speaks.

"yeah.. yeah i agree. i've only been with him for a few years now. i wonder how i kept that up... but i believe in myself. i believe in my decision and i believe in my love with him. i don't care about the east or west either. it's.. it's only a matter of the mind and soul. we work pretty nicely in my opinion."

"well.. that's good to hear from you. i only want you to be happy, even if it means i can lose you." yoongi's voice shattering. he's the one sobbing now, but hoseok continues to listen.

"thank you, hyung. for the first time i feel trusted." hoseok says lowly

"when do you plan to see him? do you need help?"

"i don't know... soon? soon. and i won't go until i know our first meeting will be perfect, amazing, grand."

"i could help you out with that."