paroxysm | j.jh

16 - Narration

S A V A N N A H

"Did I make you worry?" malambing ang pagkakasabi ko non. A mixture of hope and sadness was all over my eyes. I can feel that my heart is racing just by the thought that Jung Jaehyun is right in front of me. Hindi ko na inalala na medyo nakakunot ang makakapal niyang mga kilay.

Tinitigan ko ang mukha niyang hinding hindi ko pagsasawaan na tingnan. His fair complexion, his messy hair, his red lips and perfectly attractive set of eyes. While staring at him, all I can say is that God was really in a good mood when he created him.

He sighed heavily bago naglakad ng mabagal palapit sakin. Hindi ko iniiwas ang aking tingin sa kanya. I stared at him and can't help but to notice every little things about him. He's annoyed, that's for sure.

Nang medyo makalapit sakin ay nakatingala na ako sa kanya. I'm sitting and he's standing right in front of me. Hindi parin siya umiimik at nakatingin lang sakin na parang iniinspeksyon pa ang mukha ko.

"It's already late." he stated. Kalma ang boses at di ko mahimigan ang kahit na anong inis kahit pa nakakunot ang noo niya.

I smiled unconsciously as I stared at my own feet. Bigla akong kinabahan. Kanina sa chat ay ilang salita na ang natanggap ko kay Jaehyun. I'm a strong willed person, yes, but I'm also just human... napapagod.

"I'm just here to get some fresh air." I reasoned out. Well it's kinda true that I wanted fresh air but also I wanted to clear my mind from all the hurtful words that I got from him and to find courage to face him once again. Nagiipon ng lakas ng loob ulet kung baga.

"It's not safe to wonder around alone this late, Savannah." hindi parin ako makatingin sa kanya. I'm at fault. It is very immature of me to go out without informing Hani.

"I know... did she told you?" Luka talaga 'yon si Hani. Sinumbong pa ako kay Jaehyun oppa.

"Mark did." Natigilan ako ng malaman na si Mark pala ang nagsumbong.

"I bothered you again." malungkot ang boses ko dahil panigurado nadisappoint nanaman siya sakin. He sighed heavily as he sat next to me. He leaned backwards and stared up at the sky.

I took that chance to stare at him. He looked good even if he's just wearing a plain t-shirt and just sweat pants.

"I was a little harsh to you." sabi niya na nakapagpatigil sakin sa pag-admire sa kagwapuhan niya.

Bigla siyang lumingon sakin at nagtagpo mga mata namin. Napakurap kurap naman ako at naramdaman ko ang paginit ng mga pisngi ko. I'm blushing!

"I'm sorry if I hurt you." My mouth went slightly open as I heard those words from his mouth. Ever since I started liking Jaehyun and I started bothering him, hindi naiiwasan na mainis siya sakin at mapikon. I admit I'm a little annoying that sometimes I just go overboard.

Kapag naiinis siya ay nakakapagsalita siya ng mga bagay na masasakit. That didn't bother me actually. It hurts of course but that's nothing compared to how I'm feeling for him right now. Parang kahit masaktan ako, matatabunan 'yon gada nakikita ko siyang ngumingiti. My heart will always beat for him, and to him only.

"Ayon nalang 'yon? Sorry lang? Walang kiss?" I teased him. Nanliit mata niya at tila nainis nanaman. Napatawa nanaman ako.

See? That's how I can easily forgive him.

"How about Ice cream?" he offered. Napa-pout naman ako.

"Ice cream? What do you think I am? A kid?"

"Take it or leave it, Savannah." I pouted as I heard him say that.

"Fine... i guess I can settle for Ice cream for now. Next time nalang yung kiss." I said in a way like as if I'm upset because I didn't get what I want.

He tilted his head at the other side while shaking his head. Tumayo siya at tumapat nanaman sakin. Inilahad niya ang dalawang kamay niya sakin, meaning he wanted to help me get up. I smiled at him and quickly accepted his offer.

Nakakatakot. Kasi ang bilis ng tibok ng puso ko. Sobrang saya niya kahit sa sobrang maliliit na bagay na ginagawa ni Jaehyun para sakin.

"Come on.. let's get you ice cream."

He started walking while I remained staring at his broad shoulders. Diko naiwasang magisip ng napakadaming bagay. Sobrang daming tanong sa utak ko. All the negative things were inside my head. Sometimes I just feel like Jaehyun is too good for me. Well he really is too good for me but since I'm stubborn, I still want him for me.

Kahit di kami, Lord. Ipipilit ko po. Hanggat kaya ko. I won't give up kahit masakit.