Skywalker Rises

Past and Future

"Why didn't you say something?" 

Rey wasn't yelling at him yet, but he assumed she'd get there. His memories of his parents yelling at each other when he was young were distinct, even after all he had been through since then. She was pacing back and forth in front of him, her arms clasped tight across her chest. He stood there and tried to look as bland as possible. He hadn't expected this severe of a reaction. 

"What would I have said?"

She stared at him, her eyes wide in disbelief. He was having a hard time understanding why this upset her so much. When she didn't speak, he decided he might as well get it all out.

"What would you have done? If you had known."

"I don't know."

"That's the point. If you know your future, how can you be sure that information doesn't alter it? Believe me, I had no interest in losing those memories."

Rey threw up her hands. "You should have told me. You could have told me whilst you were Kylo Ren!"

"That's ridiculous, and you know it. Besides, I didn't have any idea what was going on. After...the night you just had with me, it didn't take long for me to recognize that something was off. But I honestly had no idea. This particular situation is uniquely ours, I think."

She scowled at him. Gods above, even that movement of her mouth was insanely attractive. 

"That was the night before Pasaana, where you tried to kill me. Remember? That is in both of our pasts." 

"You could have told me then."

"Should I have waited until you (and let me just interject, that move was bloody brilliant) brought down my ship? Or should I have taken you aside before you started spouting lightning and asked if you always tried to kill men the day after you fucked them? I don't have a lot of experience with women, but when one tries to kill me, I take that shit seriously. No matter how much I want her in my bed."

Her cheeks turned a beautiful shade of pink, and she stopped pacing. 

"The first time I kissed you was the last time you kissed me. This is very confusing."

The fight had gone out of her, and she looked miserable. 

"I wouldn't change it, Rey. Not for anything. That night was precious. And it started me down a different path. I didn't know you were this Rey, the 'post-Sith destruction, dead Ben' Rey. I just know that after that night, I started thinking of you as something much more than a partner who complimented my power. I wanted you in a different way after that. It scared me. So no. I didn't tell you. Because I couldn't tolerate the idea that if I did, you would change it somehow. Call it selfish. I'll admit that it is. Just don't be too harsh about it. I didn't actually promise, after all."

"A technicality," Rey mumbled, but she uncrossed her arms and stood in front of him. "Was that the last time I go backwards?"

He shrugged, and kept his face blank.

"Can I go backwards at will? I guess if I'm trying now, that's the only direction I could go."

Again, he stood there, unable to answer. Anything he said would effect her decision. Saying nothing might be just as bad. She thought too much about things sometimes.

"Just do what you think is right. That's all you've ever done, and you've been perfect. I think my life would have gone better if I had done the opposite of what I wanted."

"I wish..." She trailed off.

"I wish we could have that again, too." 

He leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers, knowing as he did that it would only make this all the more difficult. He felt nothing. 

He was supposed to be teaching her, but he couldn't bring himself to waste another precious second doing anything of the sort. He would fade soon, and she would be on her own. There wasn't anything more important than just spending time while he still could. Anakin was gone now. The other world had become a lot quieter, even though Anakin hadn't talked much. 

"OK," said Rey. "I'll figure this out."

He frowned at her. "What?"

"This mess we're in. There has to be a solution."

"You'll beat death? Careful, Palpatine's granddaughter."

She snorted. "I obviously can't beat death. But there has to be something. Maybe I could figure out how to go backwards earlier. So we can have more time together."

"Please be careful. You are too willing to place yourself in Kylo Ren's hands. He is more dangerous than you could ever imagine. I can't say what I would have done if you had come earlier. Remember how horribly I behaved the night I came here? It probably would have been worse the earlier you go. I don't want to wake up in the morning with a new set of memories that I regret."

The Mandalorian approached Rey. He glanced right past Ben. 

"Have you seen my son?" 

"No," said Rey. "How long has he been missing? He can't have gone far."

True enough. Ahch-To was tiny. Ben couldn't understand how Luke had lived here for so long. 

"I've been around the island. C-3PO said the Caretakers haven't seen him. He likes those stupid birds, but I don't think he'd try to reach the ones on the cliff faces." 

"I'll help you look," said Rey. She surreptitiously motioned for Ben to follow her. "There are caves below. You don't think he would have gone down there, do you?"

"I told him not to," said the Mandalorian. 

"Would one of the others have done something in training?" she whispered.

The Mandalorian looked back at her. Ben was glad his face was covered. 

"We're not alone," she said to the Mandalorian, and passed a hand through Ben's shoulder.

The Mandalorian grunted.

Little Yoda came running around the top of the hill. "Papa! I'm here!"

Luke and Yoda followed behind him, watching him return to his father. Ben didn't trust either of them. What were they teaching this overpowered terror now?