Skywalker Rises

A Goodbye

"This is the last time you will see me," said Leia. 

Rey sat facing her former general, her leader, the only real mother figure she had ever known. She tried not to cry, but gave up after the pressure behind her eyes was too much to bear. She didn't want her last memories of Leia to be shrouded in grief. 

"Oh, dear one, I know this is hard. But it is time."

"What am I going to do?"

She didn't bother to swipe the tears away. They tumbled down her cheeks and dropped onto her shirt.

"You're going to do what you must. The legacy of the Jedi lies in your very capable hands. I know you're worried. None of us are."

"But." She didn't have words for how overwhelmed she felt. 

"Luke and Yoda will not return, either. They send their regards."

"Why aren't you coming back? Are you all fading so fast?"

"We have placed our bets, so to speak. Now we let the chips fall where they may." 

"I don't understand any of you."

"I know. I felt much the same way when I began my journey. The trick is to start walking, even if you can't see the path. Trust those who go before you. They sometimes leave footprints."

"Fine."

"I wanted to talk through something with you. It's important."

"OK. I'm not going to understand it though, am I?"

"Oh, I don't know about that. You're clever. What would have happened if my son had not died on Exegol?"

"I suppose I'd be dead now, and he would be alive."

"Imagine the Resistance searching through the rubble and finding Ben alive."

Goose bumps broke out all over Rey's skin. "That wouldn't have gone well."

"I don't think so, either. I'm not sure if he would have survived. Even if you and he both had. I would like to think that the Resistance would have captured him alive and offered him some kind of trial. But even then. Rey, would any court have dismissed his crimes? Even with proof of his conversion?"

"No," Rey whispered. 

Leia nodded. "I agree. He is a criminal. Regardless of why. Regardless of his conversion. He caused too much damage to be allowed to live. He would have died had he given his life for you or lived to be executed as a war criminal. I don't think that's why he healed you. I don't think it even occurred to him. We've talked at length these past months."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because I want you to think about it. I know you have plenty to think about already, but add this to the bucket."

Rey had known from the start that this conversation wouldn't make any sense. What was the point? She didn't want to spend her last time with Leia being upset with the woman. So she nodded. 

Leia folded her hands together. "You have been the daughter I didn't know I needed. I am proud of you. Always remember that."

Rey wanted to reach out and grab her, but it was pointless. Leia smiled, and vanished. 

Rey thought about screaming. She hadn't learned enough. And she had never been so aware of how alone she was. 

She could return to Coruscant and try to integrate into life there. Again. Last time hadn't been a success, but maybe now that she'd put some space between the last effort, she could succeed. 

She looked at the passage on life essences again. Palpatine had perfected his method, utilizing the accumulated knowledge of countless Sith. She had a passage in a dusty old book, zero practice, and a moral inability to practice even if she did have a subject. 

Leia hadn't said whether or not Ben would come back. She had only mentioned herself and the others. 

She left her hut and went to the Razor Crest. She knocked before she entered. The ship was in good shape for its age. The Mandalorian and Little Yoda were playing a game of Dejarik. It looked like Little Yoda was winning. 

They both looked up as she entered, but she sat down and motioned for them to finish. 

"Something on your mind?" asked the Mandalorian once the game had finished. 

"I wanted to talk you through a situation that happened in the past," said Rey. "I need some help understanding it. And I need some feedback on a crazy idea."

"And my help?" said Little Yoda.

Rey took a deep breath. "Maybe. But only if I can be sure, without any doubt, that it will be safe."

"Impossible," said the Mandalorian. "Even with the best possible plan, things go wrong. Tell us about it. We will do the best we can."

The Mandalorian offered her a huge sheet of paper and a chalk pencil, which was so antiquated it was adorable. And Rey began talking. She drew the entrance to the Sith arena, and the arena itself. Ben had told her his side of the story before, so she had some idea where Palpatine had Force Pushed him into the crevice. The timing wasn't accurate, and the Mandalorian had a lot of questions she couldn't answer. 

She also told them about her strange connection to Ben Solo - Kylo Ren, and how she could go back in time. 

The Mandalorian shook his head when she finished. "Being a Mandalorian is a lot easier than being a Jedi."

"I'm going to be both!" said Little Yoda. 

Rey wasn't sure how much of the conversation he had actually understood. 

"I need more information," said the Mandalorian. "I need to know how long these events take. I need to know EXACTLY when they happen. I need to know where those Sith soldiers you killed came from, and where their bodies landed. Was their Lightning? What happened after your boyfriend came up out of the pit? That kind of thing."

"How am I supposed to do that?" said Rey.

"You just told me you can go back in time," he said. "Go back and find out."

She gaped at him, not quite understanding.

"I don't know how to do that. And I'm pretty sure I would have noticed myself standing in that Sith arena, watching myself."

Little Yoda turned his huge eyes on her. "Not if you were invisible."