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𝙤𝙗𝙖𝙣𝙖𝙞 𝙞𝙜𝙪𝙧𝙤 | 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙩𝙝𝙡𝙚𝙨𝙨

Angst + Fluff~♡
1394 words

hate is strong, but love is stronger

[Y/N POV]
I know he hates me. I know he was just forced to train me. He seems to not care for me at all. I get why though. I'm annoying, and could never follow his instructions correctly. I'm also clumsy, and get flustered a lot.

Obanai: I told you to do it properly!
Y/N: I'm sorry! It won't happen again!
Obanai: It better not. I never knew why I accepted to train you in the first place. You're worthless!
Y/N: I- I understand.
Obanai: Now go, and do it again! Properly this time.
Y/N: Understood.

I trained night and day to meet his expectations, but it never seems to be enough. I don't know why, and I'm angry with myself that I did, but I fell in love with him. I hate this feeling of being in love with someone who does nothing but make you feel worthless. I don't hate him, I'm just hurt with his words. He doesn't seem to care for me as a person. I kept up with it though, for my future as well, and so that I can help more people after this training. His words, they brought me down, but they somehow encouraged me to do better. Nonetheless, they still pierce through my soul and ego. I always try my best, but he never really seems to notice. He's always focused on something else, her perhaps. Mitsuri-chan is a good person, and she's nice to me. But I can't help but feel sad when I see him so flustered, soft, and caring with her. It's like he's a whole different person compared when he's with me. He goes from cold to kind just like that. He does hate me, doesn't he? I'm just extra baggage to him who does nothing but pull him down. I accept that.

[Obanai POV]
I may never seem to show it, but I do care for Y/N. Sure, she's clumsy and such, but I always thought it was cute. She tripped while bringing my water once, and she got so flustered. It was cute, but I could never be soft in front of her. I can't show it. She must think I'm heartless and cold for shouting at her all the time, and it's alright if she does. I understand. But, she's my subordinate after all. Coaching her, training her to be tough is my responsibility. She needs to grow. Grow to be a powerful demon slayer, that could help so much people. That's what she aims to be, what I aim to make her be. I'm honestly so proud of where she's came and how she developed from being inexperienced to someone who knows her will, strengths, and weaknesses. I'm proud. I'm happy. She trained hard for this, and she's strong, caring, and determined. Which is most probably why I made myself fall for her. Again, I could never tell her that, neither could I show it. We always need to be professional, and she most probably would never like me. The way I treat her, the way I talk to her, the words that I describe her with, must've destroyed her inside. I feel bad, but that's what made her tougher. I care for her well-being at all times, and her safety is my priority. I just hope she forgives me for the way I treated her.

[Days Later - A/N POV]

Obanai: You're sick?!
Y/N: Y-yes sir.
Obanai: How did this happen?
Y/N: I-I trained i-in the rain.
Obanai: Are you stupid? Do you want yourself to get sick? Look at you! You're burning hot, and you can't even stand up properly! Do you not care for your health? Your well-being?
Y/N: I-I do sir.
Obanai: Then why did you do that? You don't seem to care for yourself at all!
Y/N: I just wanted to train harder, s-sir.
Obanai: You could have trained another day! You may not care for yourself, but I do! I care for you! Cancel your mission, you're not going.

Y/N couldn't seem to process what she heard. He cared for her? Before Y/N could even interrupt, Obanai stormed off the room angrily. He was disappointed at her, and was scared for her state. She was bedridden, and had an awful fever. She was weak.

[Y/N POV]
Look what you did! You made him mad, and it's more than usual. I've never seen him this mad before. He also told me he cared for me. That warmed heart, it truly did. But I just wanted to meet his expectations, so I trained, even in the rain. I never thought I'd catch a fever, and a really bad one too. I couldn't cancel my mission! This was the one I trained extra hard for. I just can't let all that training go to waste. Besides, it's also a chance to prove myself to him. I weakly packed my stuff, and of course, my sword. I was weak, yes, but I could still do it. I slowly stood up, and exited the estate.

[Obanai POV]
Am I stupid? I told her I cared for her, which is what I was trying to avoid doing. I just hope she gets herself healed. I can't look at her right now. I feel like I might cry and sob when I do. I'm busy for the rest of the week anyways. The next time I can visit her is probably next week.

[One Week Later - A/N POV]

Obanai: She's gone?! She's been gone for a whole week and nobody even cared to tell me?!
Shinobu: Calm down. She went on her mission, isn't that her job?
Obanai: She was sick, Shinobu! Is she stupid or something? I told her not to go. She had a horrible fever, and she was incredibly weak! She didn't even tell me that she was going!
Shinobu: You should've checked on her. You do know she wants to make you proud, right? You've been doing nothing but hurt her with your words, and only wanted to satisfy you.
Obanai: She should do that if she wasn't sick! It's exactly like how she got sick in the first place!
Shinobu: Maybe if you cared for her, and showed her support, maybe she wouldn't have to feel the need to meet your expectations.
Obanai: I do care for her! I-I just... can't show it.
Shinobu: Why not?
Obanai: It's none of your business.
Shinobu: Well, is it because you're embarrassed about falling in love with your subordinate?
Obanai: N-no.
Shinobu: No need to hide it. She's in the butterfly estate, in a critical state. She returned yesterday. We didn't want to let you know yet.
Obanai: Damn it, Shinobu! You could've told me earlier! I got worried!
Shinobu: Well, hurry there then.

He quickly ran to the butterfly estate, into the infirmary. There he saw Y/N, bedridden once again, looking weak and pale, filled with bruises and cuts all over her body.

Obanai: Y/N! Are you ok? I was worried! You could've at least told me you were going!

He couldn't help but feel tears form in his eyes. He quickly ran to hug her.

Y/N: I'm sorry I disobeyed your orders. I-I just wanted to make you proud.
Obanai: I already am proud! I always have been. Your safety and health are my priorities! Please, don't ever do that again.
Y/N: U-understood, sir.
Obanai: Can you stop calling me that, dumbass? You don't always have to talk so formally with me.
Y/N: Right, of course.
Obanai: I love you, you dumbass. Don't hurt yourself again. I care for you.
Y/N: I-

Before Y/N could continue, she was cut by another tight hug. Tears fell down on her shoulder, as she felt him cry.

Obanai: Don't scare me like that ever again, ok? I'm sorry i hurt you, just don't do that again.

She hugged him back. Obanai was surprised with her actions, causing him to blush in the middle of his tears.

Y/N: I'm sorry. It won't happen again. I love you too.

[End]

Wooh! That was sad :") But here is another fluff-angst! Hope you enjoyed!