Part 1

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The hills and valleys of my popcorn ceiling distract me from my current reality. Waiting for a text from a guy that could care less about me. I know I'm not alone on this, after all it happened to Red and Heidi, but that doesn't stop me from pitying myself. Thinking back on everything, I still don't know how I got here. It's my Junior year at South Park High School and I'm dating the same guy as last year. Well not the same guy I started dating, he changed a lot, at least he changed how he acted around me. He used to be the #1 person I went to but now he's never even there. He's always busy or at sports. The only time I see him is on Friday's or at school. Its not what I really signed up for but I can't find it in myself to leave. Even when I talk to him about it I'm ignored. It's really- 

Oh he texted!

Clyde- Hey so my place at 4?
Y/n- Kk, I'll otw soon.
Clyde- Wear those nice pants I like
Y/n- Okay? See you soon <3
Clyde- see you soon

I force myself to sit up right as I stare at the texts. I get up after a bit and put on the leggings he tells me he loves. I was already ready wearing a cozy sweater, skinny jeans, and a pair of sneakers, but I changed for him. Like always. 

His place is only a five minute walk so I didn't bother with taking my car, just grabbed my house keys and wallet and started walking. It was cold out as the sky was covered with grey clouds. The weather forecast said nothing about rain, so it must be snow. 

After peeling my eyes away from the sky I look down at the notification on my phone, from Red. She texted me a asking my plans for today and when finding out she sent a ':|' text, I glance at it and laughed knowing that she was using her 'if you got nothing nice to say don't say anything' rule. 

Soon enough I arrived at Clyde's. I knock on the door and hear a shuffle then him unlocking the door. He nods at me and I come in. I was expecting a hug or a kiss but as always he just goes back and walks into him room not talking to me. I don't even get why he is with me at this point. I follow him into his room and sit next to him on the bed only to have him scoot away from me. I look down and sigh mouth wanting to move, yell at him, ask him why he doesn't care for me, anything. But I do nothing.

After a while of scrolling on our phone in silence he speaks, "Babe," I look up at him brightly, " look at this meme," my smile fades. I look the the meme and give him a slight smile. After a hour of both of us on phones not talking I got bored so I place my phone done and look at him. He is leaned against his bed frame and his feet laid out in front of him. While I am sitting on the side of his bed next to his feet. I missed the first week of our relationship when he acted like he loved me. The last year I have been dealing with him pushing me off hoping he would fix it tomorrow. Yet it only seems to just get worse. Red tells me it's just for sex and I need to leave, but if that's all it is, I should just give it to him right? I'm his girlfriend after-all, it's my job.

I look at his legs and how they are slightly separated. I look at him and whisper his name to see him look up at me annoyed. With his attention on me I slowly make my way between his legs. He smirks and puts his arms up as I sit on his lap, I take his phone from his hands setting it on the nightstand. Him and me making eye contact the entire time. I look at him biting my lip, he smirks as my finger slowly traces his faint abs outside his shirt. I lean in and kiss him passionately, only for him to take the lead. Sliding his tongue across my lip forcing entry. Squeezing my ass he groans into my mouth. I sigh frustrated into the kiss. Moving past the loss in control, my hand slowly made its way to the tent in his pants. I move from his mouth to his chin, to his neck. After a while I pull off his shirt and kiss down his chest. "Y/n," he chokes out as I began to pull down his boxers. I hear his phone go off so I stop my actions. I go to grab his phone but his tries to reach it before me.

"What don't you want me to see?" I say with a giggle as I look down at his phone to see a text message from Bebe, it's a image. I enter his password and go to her contact. It's nudes. I scroll up to see him flirt with her, saying he loves her, and him begging for pictures. "Clyde," I whisper hurt. He looks confused and I turn the phone to him, him getting it right away saying the classic, 'it's not what you think' and I had enough. "I'm leaving," I get up and walk to leave but he stops me. "I'm not hearing anything you have to say, bye, have fun with your slut," I say and pull my hand away and walk out. I get home and sit on my bed.

I was confused by the fact I wasn't crying. I look at my phone to see a lot of text from Clyde all saying the same thing. I spoke to myself, " 'It's not what you think' please he thinks he can pull that on me." Yes I'm hurt but not as badly as I thought I would be. I pick up my phone and text Clyde 'It's over' and mute his contact, not ready to block him. I look through my camera roll and see a picture of him and I deleted it immediately. I go into messages and text Kenny, 'I need you' and I have never gotten a call so fast in my life.

I pick up the phone to a out of breath Kenny and the sound of running, "Y/N! What happened?! What's wrong?! I'm on my way!" He spoke out of breath I giggled at that. "What's funny, is this not important," I hear his running slow, "Y/n I swear-," I cut him off.

"Clyde cheated on me," I speak softly and I think he heard. As I hear him mumble something pissed off and him picking up his pace to faster than before. He stays on the phone with me saying nothing and him just running. He always does this when I need him. He stays on the phone worried I will get worse if he leaves for just a second. Soon enough I hear someone unlock the door and I already know it's him as he hung up the phone. I hear him running up the stairs to my room. He slams open my door to see my sitting on my bed holding my legs.

"Y/n," he says out of breath as he walks over and sits next to me. Knowing not to touch me yet as of things that happened before when he touched me and I flinched. I slowly lean my head on his shoulder with a sob escaping my mouth. I didn't realize how much Clyde hurt me. As soon as my head hit Kenny's shoulder he wrapped his arm around me holding me close. I wrapped my arms around his waist as well. Trying to hide my sobs. He pulls me into his lap, I put my head and snuggle into his neck. He puts him hand on my head and slowly runs his fingers through my hair, whispering that everything is going to be okay. After I while I calm down and move my face so I can look into his blue eyes.

I smile and move off his lap and got comfortable in my bed patting next to me so he can lay down and get comfy. "Wanna play f/g (favorite game)?"

"Always!" he smiles back at me as I turn on the TV and consul and sit back down. "Hey if your not okay don't act like it, you can show your pain."

I nod, "I know it's just right now I don't want to think about it, I had my suspicions so I'm not that surprised, just going over how I held on for a year of him not talking to me hurts the most. I should of moved on." I give him a sad smile and he does the same and messes up my hair, "Now, let's game boi!" We both laugh and smile the entire time he is over with only few moments of sadness and his anger for Clyde. Soon it got dark outside.

"Fuck!" I turn and look at the boy who just cussed, "it's 10 I can't go home now. You know my parents. Can I stay over?"

" Please," I whisper not wanting him to leave he nods and texts his mom. "Kenny?" he hums a response, "Why are you still wearing your hood?" He looks up confused and shrugs. He pulls down the hood and takes of his parka. He is in a black t-shirt and grey sweatpants. I slide off my bed and go to mess his hair up but he glares so I run to my dresser instead and take out my comfy shorts and big tshirt, which is my dad's, something I stole before he died. I go into the bathroom and change into my pjs. I go back into my rooms to see Kenny making a bed on the floor. I jump past his 'bed' and go to my bed and scoot to the side closest to the wall. "Kenny get your ass up here, you know you never sleep on the floor so come up here!" He laughs at what I say and gets into bed next to me. I mess with his hair and he smiles. With messing with his hair I slowly fall asleep in his arms.

"Goodnight, I'll never let anyone hurt you again," I hear him whisper, "I love you." He kisses the top of my head and my heart melt. Too tired to know if any of this is real, I fall right to sleep.

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