The Truth Untold| J.JK ✔️

12: Love Myself

~Why do you keep wanting you hide inside your mask?

You've shown me I have reasons I should love myself

I'm learning how to love myself~

I spent most of the night with you. It was the happiest night of my life. I just can't believe this has happened. All my life I've been told no one will love someone behind a mask, that I'm nothing, but tonight you told you love me. And my love for you was finally told.

The things to said to me made me feel something indescribable. The way you say my name makes my heart jump. I've never loved hearing my name so much. I've never been called my name unless my mum is furious at me. I've always been nameless. And that's the way I have been to you too. But now I have a name you can call me by. And my heart races so much when you say it. My heart races and I think your lying to me when you say I'm gorgeous. That I'm not ugly. That I'm beautiful. I still don't believe that's true. But I will try, for you.

It's the next morning and I don't have school today. At first I think everything that happened last night was a dream. But then I see my broken mask on my bedroom floor and realise it's not. I climb out of bed and pick up my mask and simply stare at it. This is what I've been hiding under my entire life. This is the reason why no one would want me. But still you did. And you always kept telling me to take it off.

I walk outside into the morning sunlight and throw my mask in the rubbish bin. I don't need it anymore. Because you told me I don't need it. And so I believe you.

As I walk back inside I spot something on the doorstep. Curiously I put it up and my eyes widen when I see my name it's addressed to. No one sends me letters cause I don't know anyone. Who would write me a letter? I read who it's from and the letter nearly slips from my hand.

Dad?!

I rush inside to find my mum in the kitchen. I feel like my heart just jumped out of its chest. I feel like my whole world is about to come crashing down. "Eomma what does this mean?" I ask with tears in my eyes and I shove the letter in her hand. She gives me a questioning look but she goes into shock reading the letter. "No...it can't be" She whispers.

"What?" I ask. "What is all this about?"

"Nothing" She reply's quickly.

"Nothing? Then why did I just get a letter from my dad saying that he never knew he had a son and he wants to meet me?!!" I yell completely shocked. I don't understand. I thought my dad left our family because of me. Then why does that letter say he never knew about me?

"It's nothing" My mum says nervously.

"It's not nothing! Tell me what this is about!"

My mum takes a deep breath and puts the letter on the kitchen bench top and faces her back to me. "When I found out I was pregnant with you, your dad and I were dating. I was going to tell him the news one night but that night I caught him with another girl. I was extremely broken so I ran away with you and never told him about you."

I feel like my entire whole just crashed. I feel like a bomb has just exploded on me. I feel like time has stopped and I'm just standing there frozen with tears rolling down my face. All this time I never knew the truth about my father. And now....it's more than I expected and I feel like collapsing. "But...Then...Why..." I feel all these questions for in my mind that I feel it might explode.