j* movie reviews 2020

The Farewell (2019)

An interesting snapshot of a family moment.

Gosh Awkwafina is good, isn't she? And here she's our main character, Billie, dutiful daughter, loving grand daughter. The gist of this story is the Chinese grandma, Nai Nai, has cancer. But family etiquette dictates that they won't tell her she has it and she's going to die. It's to be their secret to bear. Instead they get the whole family back together in China for what may or may not be a sham wedding as an excuse to see her one last time. Kind of almost as a wake for the living, under pretence of a wedding.

In someways I felt it is sort of Tower of Babel story. There are a lot of moments that hinge on language, and it's really open to showing the impact of language and cultural barriers. As the family returns we have those who have stayed and lived in China, those who moved to Japan and those who went to America. When re-united, there are conversations that take place in different languages, thus excluding certain listeners. All that can be understood is the emotion.

And yet, the different cultures also speak through different emotions or understandings of expression of these. It raises a lot of interesting ideas around cultural relativism and how in an inter-connected world we're still at the whimsy of our own experiences. Because here you're never sure of the middle ground in the push-me-pull-you of ideas. Is the law of the land the right one? Does tradition always triumph over change? Is lobster better than crab?

So it's mostly a slow burn drama. At the start there is so much tension around the idea that wild-card American Billie might let slip to Nai Nai that she has the cancer. But this kind of evaporates. It becomes more a kind of sketch of a family grieving whilst not being allowed to. A portrait of a Nai Nai as they want to remember her. If you have a family, then this is an interesting film to watch, and kind of try to imagine who is who in your own family dramas.

J* gives it 3 stars