30 Day Letter Challenge 2012 - Emily

Day 10 - Someone You Don't Talk Much

Day 10 -Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to

Dear Person,

I miss you. We used to talk so, so much and see each other all the time, pretty much every night. But now I barely speak to you and I hate it.

You used to be like my brother. Our parents were dating, so we would do a lot together, and we instantly formed a strong friendship. It took a while for you to trust me, but finally you did. You opened up to me about all your problems, and there were a lot of them! You had problems with your dad, your brother, your job, your friends and school. On top of that, you were also being bullied. I tried so hard to get you to tell someone about it but you refused. You said you could deal with it. I feel bad for not taking action myself, but you have pulled yourself out of it so well and I am really proud of you.

The first time we met, I was set on hating you. I had only found out a few weeks before that my parents had split up and that my mum was seeing someone. I couldn’t say your dad’s name without crying before I met you guys. Then one day I wanted to get it over with. I wanted to stop the horrible feeling I got whenever your dad’s name was mentioned. So I made Mum organise a meeting, even though she thought it would be best if we waited a little while longer. I’m so glad we didn’t because I think that if that feeling of hatred grew anymore, I would never have been able to even consider enjoying your company.

So one April night, we all went bowling. The first time I saw you, I knew I wouldn’t hate you. I don’t know how I knew, because you are quite shy, but I did.

Bowling was fun, although it was really awkward at times. I didn’t really take a liking to your dad straight away like I did with you and your brother, but somehow I made it through and grew to like him.

I hate to break it to you, but you suck at bowling! Nearly every single ball you got in the gutter!  I also think that you’re my good luck charm. That one time we went was the only time I’ve ever won! And I haven’t since then!

Anyway, what I’m trying to say is, you helped me get through a lot of things and feelings through my parents’ breakup. You don’t know that, but I do appreciate it.

We are such different people, but that could be partly to do with our upbringing. I’ve always had two parents who love and would do anything for me, and a family who means everything to me. You, on the other hand, have had a really hard life. When your parents’ got divorced, your mum had half custody of you and your brother. Then one day, she decided she didn’t want you two anymore and you had no choice but to live with your dad. I think that might have affected your relationship with him as well. I never thought it would be possible to hate a parent, but you hate your mum and I completely understand why. She has done some horrible things to you over the years, which you’ve told me bit by bit, and now you refuse to see her with good reasons.

We’ve had some really good times together. One of my favourite memories was going to see Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 with you. At the cinema, we saw your vice principal with her son. You were hoping that she wasn’t going to the same movie, but we could tell that she was. The funniest thing was we ended up having to sit next to them. We pretty much shared a seat because you didn’t want to sit next to her, it was hilarious!

Another time I will always remember was when we went to that island on a tour thing. We had to get up at about 6 that morning and we were both exhausted all day, not being morning people. Whenever we were in the car, we would both sleep. I literally had numb legs from you sleeping on them! That day was really fun. After the island tour, we went to the shopping center and you bought a nerf gun… I have no idea why! I refused to be seen walking around with you carrying a nerf gun, so we took your dad’s keys to take it to the car… and got majorly lost! We wandered around for about half an hour before we finally found the car, and by that time, our parents and brothers were already in there. After that we went rollerblading, which I fail at! You had to take me around and I kept pulling you down with me. It was so much fun!

A couple of weeks ago we talked again… properly. First time in ages. We had a Skype call for about 2 hours. We planned to catch up again soon, go to the movies or take a train down to the city or whatever. I didn’t mind as long as I could hang out with my friend again! But after that, silence. You didn’t talk to me again.

It’s horrible now. I really want to talk to you as much as I used to. I miss our conversations to no end. It’s crazy how much I miss them. But every time I talk to you now, you barely speak. It’s not like how it was before. I don’t know why! Is it because my mum and your dad split up? I don’t think it is because that side of things never mattered to you. You put our friendship before all of that. We still talk sometimes like how we used to, but they are on your terms only. Why? I have no idea. It’s only once every few months that you start a conversation with me and talk naturally, but whenever I start one with you, it’s like you’re replies are robotic, unnatural.

I hope that one day we can fix our friendship, because I miss you.

Love Em xx