21 FEBRUARY 2020
To feel nothing at all has been a torment for my soul but today, you helped me feel again.
Who knew the last meal we had would be on a lovely Friday afternoon, the sun peaking through the glass.
Who knew the last time we held each other would be on a warm Friday afternoon with the sunflowers blooming under the sun's radiance.
What a fucking irony.
To see you type a "last", that ripped me apart.
If only I knew 21 February 2020 was going to be our happily not ever after, I would have held you tighter. If only I knew you were going to call this cyclone upon me, I would have wanted to have a taste of you before it was all torn to ashes.
So this was how it worked, I am in my room typing and feeling my throat go dry as I watched the screen fade into oblivion.
Fucking hell.
I deleted a chapter about us because I did not want that beautiful memory of yours to be tarnished in my head. Even if these stories were partially factual and thinly veiled with rose coloured glasses, I would gladly take it.
Two hundred and sixty-six days of knowing each other.
Two hundred and sixty-six days of pushing and pulling and we halt.
today.
Where has our time went?
Why did you stop pushing?
If someone else had barged into our picture, I would have chased you out but I still made my heart your loft.
Can this not be the end?
I thought we told each other we would always be writing our stories together. I thought we promised to always be there and never leave.
I was happier with you in the fog but now you have completely vanished.
Why does it feel so empty?
The rose you gave me, the petals have begun to wrinkle and its lustrous green leaves slowly withering.
You and it died the same day you finally packed your bags and moved out of me.
To experience such profound loss that was not scripted made me feel the lingering darkness on my chest. No menthol cigarettes or nasty burns at the tip of my tongue, just the taste of raw saltiness streaming down the edge of my face.
Oh what a misfortune to have the ticking seconds formulate the end game.
Chapter eighteen:
star-crossed lovers without any time to spare,
let this chapter not be our end.
I love you and I hope we have a chance to properly love in our next life time.
YOU ARE READING
Friends with Benefits
Short StoryC A S U A L The only 6 letter word you ever destroyed for me. Down to the very bottom of my heart, you knew what we could be and you knew what my heart bore. Friends with benefits: it never worked out because we end up falling love and falling out...
