My Cracking Heart

Ex 1

Ex number one

Well dating someone is like taking one long course in who that person is. Then when you break breakup all that information becomes absolute. Having a very good memory is a burden in this right. That's why this deserves all of the last 10 chapters to conclude my cracking heart. Each individual represents a crack on my heart. Without any further ado here's what happened with Ex1 and onward. It's not precisely what happened it's how I felt about her/ them.

Ex1
I think about you.
To be honest i worry about you all the time. I care about what you think so much because of course you're my girl and mostly because i love you. I wake up every morning wondering what you're going through. I can't make a single prayer without saying your name. I can't do anything fun or good without thinking about how you have spent your day. I'm constantly grateful in the trust you have in me. I'm constantly grateful in the love you show me. I'm constantly thanking God for giving you a long life and a huge heart. To be honest i worry so much. I can't bare the thought of what trials you've faced during the day. I'm a little broken when i assume something has happened to you. I have so many dreams about you my love. I have so many things I'd love to do with you my love.  I see nothing but Greatness within your name. I feel all the love when you send a simple text message but we all know it's not as good as having you around. I wanna bother you and frustrate you and get away with it because I'm your lover. I want those rules and simple instructions that are hard to follow and I'll do them even with a frown because you're my love. I'd love to hear those words of wisdom and be asked "kuti wakakwana here haunyare kuita kunge mwana muduki" and i look down and we start laughing seven seconds later because we are lovers. I miss you so much I love you so much... After all this you managed to crack my heart. I didn't realize the trials you had during the day were that massive. I should've paid more attention to you. But instead I was too blind and it broke me. I was too blind to notice another. I was too insecure about what we were to consider how we could've ended up. But no matter my dear I'll be okay. I'll be happy again. I'll try my best to not let this change me. It's just a crack it'll heal.

My tears are not worthless