Trying Not To Love You ~ JHTBY Book II

17. Don't Feel

Numb.

The only thing I could feel..or not feel. I'm not sure which one. I couldn't comprehend the amount of time that had passed. I could faintly hear Gaige calling my name in the background, but I didn't have it in my means to respond.

"Aria, baby look at me please! I'm right here, baby please! Look at me. Aria, PLEASE!"

I could feel his hands on me, but even the mating sparks felt muted.

"Baby..please..."

Baby. My baby. Our baby. I could feel his tears drip onto my shoulder as he rocked me back and forth.

Pain.

Don't feel.

Eventually, Gaige gave up. The rocking stopped. I could feel his lips press lightly against the top of my head, and his presence slowly leave the room.

If it was possible, it hurt me more.

I felt like he had given up on me. Like I was in this alone, even though I knew better. I knew that Gaige would never leave me. I knew that I was being selfish. She was his daughter, too.

More tears slipped down my cheeks, and then, everything went black.

I knew what was happening this time, in the darkness. It didn't take long before I heard the melodic voice of the Moon Goddess calling my name.

"Aria... My sweet child," she called to me. I looked out into the darkness and spotted her hazy glow. Her arms were outstretched towards me, and I wasted no time running into them.

"Why, Goddess, why," I sobbed into her. By this point, she was supporting almost all of my weight. "She was my baby, our baby," I whimpered quietly, but she heard me.

"It was not time, my child. The war is looming close. I could not guarantee her safety, or her life if she was born."

"But I could have protected her! You took her away from me," I yelled in anguish.