Tattoos And Cigarettes [A Destiel Fanfiction]

I Need No Sympathy

Chapter 7:
A/N: MAY BE SOME TRIGGERS IN HERE TOO IM SO SORRY IM TRYING TO PUT SOME CONFLICT AND HAVE CAS AND DEAN KNOW EACH OTHER JUST BARE WITH ME.

Silence. Dean stared at the strips. He was unsure. He'd never stepped out of line, he'd always done what was wrong. He couldn't... Could he? Dean tugged on the ends of his sweater. Dean bit his lip, and shakily reached a hand out. Castiel smirked. The same one that read 'I've got you right where I want you.' Dean grabbed the tinfoil and looked at it questionably. He chewed on his lip nervously.

He was torn between being a pussy in front of Cas, or doing the wrong thing and messing himself up permanently. Dean quickly set the tinfoil down on the nightstand and Castiel cocked an eyebrow. "What? It won't bite." Castiel grinned.

Dean shook his head, "it's not that. I just.. Didn't know you did that.."

"Well, it's either acid and weed or ice and heroine."

"Why?"

"Dean Winchester, let me show you a thing." Castiel got up from the bed and went over to his dresser. He rummaged through his sock drawer until he pulled out used syringe. He smiled sadly and closed the drawer. "See, this is what you get when you hang out with the wrong people. Ice, heroine, acid, weed, pills, cocaine, I fucking drank NyQuill just to get high, Dean. I have an addiction." Castiel shrugged like it was nothing and put the syringe back in another drawer.

Dean frowned. "I didn't know.." He mumbled and Castiel shushed him.

"We haven't known each other that long, so that's why you don't know. You don't know a lot. And I don't know a lot about you. One thing I do know is; you should loosen up baby." Castiel grinned. "You don't have to take seven, just one little tab. It's not gonna hurt anything."

Dean chewed the bottom of his lip. "Just one?"

"Only one." Castiel smirked again and turned on some music. "Feels better with music." Dean turned his attention back to the foil. He picked it up and tore off a tab. He stuck it on his tongue and felt queasy at first, but slowly started feeling better. He smiled slightly. Come As You Are by Nirvana filled the room. Dean felt amazing. Castiel glided over to him and set him down on the bed. "Now the real fun starts."
~~~~~~

When Dean awoke everything was a blur and his vision was hazy. He saw a mass of jet black bed head beside him. He rubbed his eyes and yawned. He suddenly felt sick. He clenched his stomach and ran to the bathroom.

All the contents of his stomach came back up. Which wasn't much, but the hamburger he had for lunch looked rather disturbing coming back up. It made Dean sick to look at it again, so he quickly flushed the toilet. He stayed next to the toilet for another ten minutes until he was sure he wouldn't barf again.

Castiel appeared at the door and leaned against the frame. He smiled, "you okay, Winchester?" Dean only shook his head. He hardly felt up to talking. "That was fun while it lasted though. You were too jacked up to have sex."

"Wait, you wanted me to take it so you could use me?" Dean clenched his stomach and breathed heavily. He was terrified to puke again. "What? No. You asked, but when we were getting started you said you saw wings on me. Then you claimed you saw monsters. You were pretty fucked up, but it was funny to watch you stab at my wall when you thought it was a shapeshifter." Castiel laughed. Dean tried to as well, but ended up groaning in pain. Castiel smiled. "You'll be okay. My little soldier." Castiel laughed and pet Dean's hair. "You can stay here tonight. Come on, let's get you a shower and brush your teeth and we can watch a film or something." Dean nodded and reluctantly turned on the shower. Castiel left and locked the door for Dean. Just in case Gabriel came bursting through the door.

Dean had undressed and looked himself in the mirror. Scars littered his body and he frowned. Most were from how people used to beat him up. That stopped years ago. He ran his fingers over some scars on his wrists. He hadn't cut since 2 months ago. Dean sighed. He didn't have a reason to do that, he had Castiel. And Castiel would never hurt him. Dean smiled and stepped into the shower.
~~~~~~

"Gabriel, last time you tried to cook you almost burnt the house down. I don't think Crowley will be happy with that. Or Anna.. You know how Anna gets." Castiel put his hands on his hips. Gabriel blew a strand of hair on his face.

"FINE! SEE IF I EVER COOK FOR YOU AGAIN!!"

"I DONT WANT YOU TO COOK FOR ME YOU ASSBUTT!" Castiel flipped Gabriel off. Dean timidly walked into the kitchen and cleared his throat. "Uhm, I can cook?" Castiel turned around and his mouth dropped. The sweatpants Dean was wearing wore loosely and showed his hip bones a little. Dean had borrowed one of Castiel's shirts. Cas is smaller, so the shirt fit tightly on Dean, showing his abs. Castiel could have fainted.

Dean must have noticed because he blushed. Gabriel cleared his throat, "I can feel the tension in the room you guys.."

Castiel averted his eyes quickly. "Dean must make us a hearty meal. Dean!" Castiel grabbed a spatula and threw himself onto one knee, "will you do the honours?" Dean laughed and took the spatula.

"What do you guys want?"

"Pizza!" Gabriel grinned.

"Then why'd you give me a spatula?" Dean cocked an eyebrow and turned his eyes toward Castiel.

"It was the first thing I saw.." Castiel shrugged. Gabriel and Castiel left the room to Dean.

Soon the pizza was made. Gabriel barrelled into the room and took half the pizza, leaving Castiel and Dean 3 pieces. Dean grabbed two and left Cas one. Gabriel ran to his room to eat and Cas and Dean sat at the table. Castiel nibbled at his pizza and shoved the paper plate away. Dean shoved it all into his mouth, and even ate Cas's piece.

Castiel had begun to annoy Dean with how he never ate. But he knew better than to ask. It was Cas's business. Cas had already shared too much for one day. Dean had told him nothing. He kind of secretly hoped he wouldn't have to say much. He hated talking about himself. Dean played with the strings on the sweatpants. He tied it into a neat little bow and smiled.

Castiel cocked an eyebrow. "Dude, why're you smiling at your crotch? Like, are you admiring your dick? Can I admire too?"

Dean rolled his eyes and smiled wider. "No, Cas. You dork." Castiel smirked and got up to clean everything up. Dean got up and walked around the living room. It was a hardwood floor, so his socks slid every once in a while. He slid around and acted like he was ice skating.

Castiel had just finished the dishes when Dean slid in the kitchen from the living room. He had on Castiel favourite pair of sunglasses, and he had a hairbrush in his hand, acting as a microphone. "HE'S MY CHERRY PIE! COOL DRINK OF WATER SUCH A SWEET SURPRISE! TASTED SO GOOD MAKE A GROWN MAN CRY! SWEET CHERRY PIEEEEE!" Dean sang.

Castiel slowly raised his hand. "I'm his cherry pie." He whispered and his eyes were full of determination. Dean kept singing and sliding. He slid once more and-
THUMP!

Dean fell right on his butt. They looked at each other wide eyed for a moment before they broke into a fit of giggles. Castiel laughed so hard that he fell on the floor as well. They laughed even harder and held their sides. Castiel rolled onto his side and so did Dean. They laughed, and laughed, and laughed.. And stopped.

Castiel looked deeply into Dean's eyes. They just stared. Neither of them moved. It felt like all oxygen had been removed from their very spot. Castiel wanted to say something, anything. He wanted to hold Dean, or touch Dean.. Something.. Castiel couldn't find the words. Neither could Dean.

Castiel was the first to break the silence. He slowly lifted himself from the floor and helped Dean, they both sat cross legged. Castiel chewed on his lip. "I think I'm in love with you.." Castiel whispered. He said it like it was a secret, like it was a huge secret. Like it was the secret of the universe, like he'd just discovered how the world was made.

Dean sat for a moment. His stomach leaped and his heart stopped. He looked at Castiel and whispered back, "I am in love with you."