Daily Interactions

Now

When he was a little boy, he had always thought of perhaps one day he will settle down with the perfect girl with adorable pigtails and pink cheeks as they share the first kiss over ice cream. And how they will then become childhood sweethearts and one day work towards growing old together.

And that was refuted when he turned a teenager.

When he received that first kiss as an awkward teenager from a girl who had a crush on him, he was devastated because he know he was different. He felt nothing. No butterflies in belly, no fast beating of the heart, no sweaty palms. He truly believed that he is broken.

And that was refuted when many years later, he bumped this lean basketball player of a gender he didn't expect to be attracted to.

When he sees the back of his lover leaving him, he did not cry, not even when the dreams of their future together lay shattered around his feet, his well thought plans of how they can go off to college to study together and then graduate before finding for a job to then start a home together. He did not cry because he is numb and he felt that he could never love again.

And that too was refuted when he came into his life.

He was often told that he thought too far ahead into the future, imagining the future or the end of a relationship before it happened, not enjoying the present. He took this to heart and often cautioned himself not to scare the other away, the always smiling younger man who drew all around him close. He will not place pressure on this, not when for some reason the other smiled brighter just for him, he will not scare the other who for some reason fell in love with him too. He will live in the present and enjoy every moment of this.

Because at the end, the future doesn't matter because the other is his right now.